The PESH Deli - Going MAD for Hallowe'en.

[Scorpette]

Tales from the dark side, from a coven of evil hags obsessed with ghoulies. Hellish talk of FJ and puke will chill you to the marrow. Unspeakable horrors from our uterine crypts do creep - but thankfully, we're also having baybees...

BESH BAYBEES
dontrythisathome, girl born March 25.
Cheggers, twinz girlz, born April.
FannyPriceless, boy, born June 8.
CurlyCasper, girl, born June 24.
CUNextTuesday, boy, born June 29.
AlpinePony, boy, born 1 July.
Carrots, boy, born July.
IggyPiggy, girl, born July.
Cosmosis, boy, born Sept 5.
Backinthebox, boy, born Sept 7.
Skatergrrrl, girl, born Sept 10.
VAG, boy, born Oct 2.

UPDIFFED

silversky, the biggest farter, due 18 October (first baybee).
Honeymoo, 3 wees a night, due October 31 (boy).
okiecokie, self-confessed control freak, due November 6.
SomethingSuitablyWitty, benelux babe, due November 14.
ReginaMonologue, knows when all the sales are, due November 20 (boy).
maswera, jungle hottie, due December 11.
PollyPoo, wants to name her baybee after the dog, The New Messiah is due December 25.
ChoChoSan, "and Lo! The lord did resurrect her petrified womb", due 31 January.
CluckyKate, hatching an egg, due February 2.
Perfect Dromedary, defied medical science, due February 24.
Ginhag, reckless cake-carrier, due 28th Feb
Muser, will she ever stop puking?, due February 27.
Medee, finally over the Haribo craving, due March 12.
Casserole, living on hula hoops, due April 10.
MrsFC, joining whether she wants to or not, due 22 Jan.
Scorpette, now carrying a RL baby in addition to Clothilda and the squid, due 21 May.
Rocketleaf, no longer jealous of morning sickness, due 3 June.
Twinkle Toes, supergluing her fanjo shut, due 23 June.

So come on in and leave your broomsticks and pointy hats by the door!

I am bloody well being induced.

Got a couple of days for things to happen of their own accord as I am booked in.

Feel very emotional about it all.

VE was equally unpleasant and the Dr tried to do another sweep but couldn't really. Said cervix is soft but not ripe and that they would not reco daily monitoring and that she was booking me in for induction regardless.

HI was brill - defended my corner and was good during the VE, stroking my hair (on my head - to clarify) whilst meany Dr tried to pull my bloody intestines out. Well that is what it felt like.

Am off to walk my mutt. Back in a bit. Plz to and me labour vibes as otherwise it's the labour ward for me.

oh Sky, here have some natural labour inducing vibes.

Why would they not recommend daily monitoring? I would honestly hang on until the 42 weeks if you can. I don't know why but they are very good at scaring people.

Can you get to a reflexologist/acpuncture for a session a day for the next few days?

And get HI to do the secks. ALOT.

So first day of real mat leave under the belt and have been able to some quality catch-up time on the esh threads. Productive! I also made up fifty little boxes of sweets traditionally given out to people visiting after the birth here. Key-ute! They have a kind of autumnal theme that ties in with name choice - what can I say, I have time on my hands

silver sending labour vibes your way!!! I really hope that walk does the trick. It does sound like there has been a bit of progress maybe? Cervix softer? Really hoping things move quickly and you can avoid induction. I totally understand your fear of that and would feel the same way, but there are lots of positive induction threads over on childbirth that might be a helpful read? In the meantime, HI should do his duty and help this baby along! Think Okie also had a suggestion about clary sage oil at some stage that also sounded good?

Moo to be honest I didn't really go the whole hog with the hippo stuff despite good intentions, due to the fact that the CDs along are not really the full picture - you need the course etc. With an ante-natal course, yoga, swimming and a full-time job, I kinda gave up on trying to pursue a hippo course too. Now I am on ML I might try and work a bit myself on the visualisations and breathing. I quite fancy the blue ribbons actually.

laurie I am sure it will be great tomorrow. It is emotional (though compared to others here I am apparently a hard-boiled cow - a delighted smile was as far as I went in terms of emotion)but I am sure it will be fine and special.

Silver Why are they being so gung-ho about it? You're not over 42 weeks yet, are you? And it's not like the science of dating conception is accurate to within hours, either. [hangry] on your behalf.

Sending you lots of positive, bouncy, baby-falling-out-of-fanjo vibes.

Scorp Old People's Names are where it's at at the moment, you trendsetter, you. The reporty thing that Okie linked to says:

Changes in the top 100 since 1999 show how there has been a resurgence in the popularity of names which were perhaps once associated with people of the inter-war generation or earlier. Girls? names like Evie (up 157 places to number ten since 1999), Ruby (up 91 to number two) and Lily (up 45 to eight), and boys? names such as Alfie (up 60 to four) and Charlie (up 25 to seven), demonstrate this trend. However, interestingly, it would have been unusual to find any of these names, other than Ruby or Lily, in official records from earlier times, as it was rarely permitted to register shortened or familiar names.

Silver, is it wrong that I'm now visualising your cervix as an avocado? You poor thing, no wonder you're feeling so emotional. Is there any reason why they couldn't give wimminz a local anaesthetic before a VE, as it's what they feel and do, not the laydee, that matters, right? Or am I being clueless?

I have prepared this Natural Birth Cliches Package of Vindaloo (made with birds-eye chillis), raspberry leaf tea, a jack-in-the-box (to surprise you into dropping El Sproggio) and some viagra so HI can shag you day and night [hgrin] Hope one of them works!

Oh, and Silvs. Are you West London based? The fabulous man who did my acupuncture also did inducing acupuncture stuff - might be worth a punt?

Have just had severe back ache come on........ Woss that all about?! Now lying on sofa and shattered.

Clearly Dr was an evil cah. When I suggested daily monitoring her response was hard and she was def not shifting. Giving her reasons as it's my first baby and my cervix has never had to stretch before, if it was my second child then they would give the obs a go, I am well over a week late according to the dating scan and they are not kee for me to leave it much longer ESP as I have had no labour signs.

Dr was also about 9 yrs old. When she left the room at one point HI said she must have gone to get her mum!!
I did chuckle.

The Dr wasn't even going to do a sweep just booked me in. We had to ask and she did oblige but obv didn't see the point. She didn't complete the Bishop score thing either. This wasn't even the scary bitch I saw the previous time. On the positive side of things, the receptionist was luvverly.

I am all for a campaign for pain relief for VEs or that only peeps with small hands are allowed to perform them. I also think complimentary massage or sambuca shots should also be compulsory followin a VE.
Typically toe lady can fit me in at the weekend which is no good. Reflex lady has not called me back.

I have eaten nuvva slice of packet made cake in bid to cheer up.

Loving the vibes from y'all and soaking them up and visualising them reaching the baybee.

I can get to West Lahndan droms depends what part tho!? As would need to drive.

I am maintaining radio silence on FB re any preggo news / updates for obvious reasons and not telling anyone about the scheduled induction as per my reasons stated earlier in this fred.

In fact I am not posting at all as it seems to trigger update requests about the baybee/impending birth and I "vont to be alone!" a la whatever that birds name was.

silver Am sure boxer would know someone your way. Fucking Dougie Howser child-doctors.

Silv you could refuse you know. However, I know that they can be persuasive. I guess it depends on how you feel. Backache is a good sign. Maybe the blighter has been frightened into getting a move on! In the meantime eat as much cake as you can, you need it for energy and get that clary sage on your tum tum and do the sechs in boxy stylie!

I am watching my 23 month old child sitting on the lounge floor doing "yogo" which is the Waybuloo version of yoga - tres funny! Waybuloo is a bit trippy!

Welcome to proper mat leave Wit - are we going to see you round thee parts more now?

that doing the sechs boxy stylie may have sounded a bit wrong... all I mean is I believe it "worked" for her..

Dougie Howser's fricking younger sister. Bet she is a bloody ESH too.

I tried saying no but it fell on deaf ears and like you say I felt persuaded.

HI says if labour kicks off tonight it's clearly the threat of secks that's done it ! I shall be having fresh pineapple for pud later.

Hopefully sproggo is thinking that the Dr was such a bitch too and that decides to head south asap and can flip her the bird once born from the comforts of the Birthing Centre.

Have got used to the idea now the initial shock is over but I am going to refer to that Dr as Poison Dwarf from now on. I may purchase her a personality and ram that up her jaksy. You know in a polite friendly manner. ESH styleee.

I'm not letting any of these young'uns near my foofy. They need to be older than my dad or no go.

Mr Moo is erecting IKEA stools that have languished in the corner of our kitchen for 90 days. I know this, because we have just discovered we can't return them. We are not very good at "getting stuff done" unless I am on maternity leave and there is an impending threat of a baybee arriving it seems.

I am also going to try The Secks tomorrow morning. Maybe a bit of leg waving in the air too to keep it all in there. That's how it all started after all...

honey Is that your motto for life?

Hurrah for cluster-lays!

I don't want to lay just yet. I am not mentally ready. I need more sitting around doing nothing relaxing which I seem to have not done that much of since I started maternity leave. Mr C has agreed to getting up tomorrow morning and sorting mini C and taking him to nursery before he goes to work so I don't have to get up at 7am with him and can have a lie in in the spare room. I hope to wake up naturally around the other side of 10am. Let's see.

Therefore, I will not be having teh sechs this week!

Me neither. At this rate tho I'll be the woman who was pregnant forever.

Yep pony I only let experienced foofy handlers near me usually :) A philosophy that has long served me well.

One IKEA stool erected and it looks FAB. He is finishing other one with kitchen door shut because I keep interfering. Some minor swearing and loud music is disturbing my TV watching I must say.

pony do your dogs watch you doing The Secks? It puts me right off I must say.

Bloody hell deffo no voyeur furries in the room when we iz getting jiggy!

Mutt has developed a bloody limp. Typical. Not sure how that has happened.

Backache has gone.

However I am having reflex late tomorrow arvo!!

I have learnt moomoo to leave menfolk to
it when they are making a mess building flat pack furniture or mucking out. Giving tutorials is never welcomed unless you iz nekkid.

So The Apprentice again tonight. More frustrating viewing!!! Some of these people hold fabulous jobs with fab salaries and lots of responsibilities but can they do a simple task ? Can they feck!!!!!

PESHs - do I keep my third s&s appt on Friday morning?? This is with my community mw at the clinic. I did not mention to The Poison Dwarf. Opinions pls.

I don't have a choice! It's either that or furry friend whining and scratching at the door for the whole of proceedings. And He used to spend the day under Mr Moo's desk in our study. Now he just follows me around everywhere all day long. I wonder if it's cos of the baby...

Our mutt had limp last week and combination of Meloxidyl (doggy ibuprofen) from vet and total rest for a week sorted him out. I was getting worried I'd have to fork out £175 for x rays but luckily he improved. Can you get some meds and let him rest for a week?

Backache sounds good - like baby getting into right position...

I'm not sure how stools would have turned out if I had gone in there nekkid. I look so rough tonight it's not funny.

Don't do S&S until you really are up against it. I would give baby and complementary therapies every chance you can first. Have you got clary sage/sex/nipple tweaking and ball bouncing all on the go? How many days over are you?

Depends when induction is booked in for silv. If Fri appt is before then I would go - you never know the Sooty may be the one to get things going.

I am eating mince pie and ice cream!

oh yum!!! I LOVE mince pie.

Sorry to have posted about acupuncture then run; have been to babyoga. Silv needles man works in Wandsworth at the Vitality Centre - he's called Ian.

I am 40+9 but will be 40+11 on induction day. S&S is Fri am and induction is Fri eve. Reflex is tmw late arvo. Secks and tweaking to commence forthwith. Have been ball bouncing a fair bit. Should have thighs of steel as a result instead I am admiring the cellulite on top of my cellulite and stretch marks. That's the blessing of rapid weight gain. Can't see me achieving rapid weight loss post partum tho.

K9 is sleeping at the mo. Prob just pulled a muscle whilst knobbing about with a puppy whilst out walking earlier. Will see how things are tmw and then go from there.

okie be a luv and share your goodies. We have icecream in the freezer but I cannae be bothered to haul my butt outside to get it.