Gareth and Matthews thread for bereaved Mummies - the special thread where the light bulb at the end of the tunnel is always lit xx

[shabbapinkfrog]

So pleased that we are all here helping each other walk the 'crappy' path xxxx

Morning girls xx

tw have a good cry,its better out than in,i always feel better ,believe me i often do it.even at work when someone passes away,i try my hardest but now i cant help it,my eyes flow with tears and i feel so bloody stupid cos im meant to be supporting the family.
shabs are you ok,and hope tom is feeling better ,there is a lot of bugs about at the moment .
its jaydens birthday today ,ive got his balloon ,and a cherub for him,and must make it to cemetry cos i leave his card for him there ,and dd will take it off .

Lighting my candle in honour and respect of your precious Jayden xxxxxxx

Thanks Hazy , I feel bad for moaning about Harrys birthday whenit is Jaydens today , sorry

A candle is lit here in Sussex and I hope the day goes as well as it can xx

woolyjo , it is probably the going back to work thing . Every time I started another step on the getting back to "normal" road (whatever the hell that is) I would cope with it well at first and then have a bit of a meltdown . You are dealing with things you should never have to deal with and it is shitty sometimes .

A good cry does help even though it can be scary too . I have had a good sob myself this morning . I hope you are feeling a wee bit better now xx

I'll be lighting a candle today for Jayden. Happy Birthday love xxx

I hope your cry has released some of the pressure TW {{{hugs}}}

{{{hugs}}} for you too WoolyJo. It constantly feels like two steps forward and one step back doesn't it? But that will change eventually, I promise you.

Hi Hazy, Thinking of you, your DD and Jayden today - much love xx

Hiya WoollyJo, I'm with you with the unpredictable, uncontrollable waves of tears and emotion. I have days where I'm sure I could cope with work and anything else life is going to throw at me then there are days where I just can't cope with doing any of the small crappy stuff, let along deal with the bigger stuff. People tell me that's 'normal' but it sure as hell doesn't feel how i remember normal to be!! And i totally get the DH response - my dh just doesn't know what to do with me lots of days!! Anyway, I'm sending you a HUG xx

I've met a few of my work colleagues over the last few weeks so i'm putting steps in place to try to get back there sometime soon. Have had a slightly better week this week - kind of had to be better than last week!!!

TW - I totally know what you mean about the impending dates/events. DH and I started to talk about christmas and G's anniversary and what we would do [ppm throws expectations and traditions out of her living room window!!] So far I've found the lead up to dates are horrible but the on the day itself I seem to cope. Bizarre! xx

Love to all xx

Hello all , I am feeling a wee bit better now but I have had a very emotional day .
I had to really try and stop myself from sobbing in the street on the way back from pre school this morning . Just about managed it and then got in and had a weep .

Pulled myself together and went to put the heating on and managed to slam my finger in the door and then I sobbed like a baby .

Managed to pull myself together enough to go and collect D from pre school , came home and thought I would watch some shite on tv to take my mind of stuff
Someone then started singing the Eva cassidy version of "Someone over the Rainbow" .We played this at Harrys funeral .

I think someone is trying to tell me something today

I hope everyone is ok xx

PPM , you are right the lead up to these dates is always worse , I think it is the anticipation and then you get to the day and realise bugger all has changed really . I always struggle with what to do on the day . It was a bit easier when the boys were younger but now I can't really spend the day being grumpy and miserable .

thanks girls for all birthday wishes, i put it in local paper that is deliuvered on wedsday night usualy ,didnt come so made dh drive me four miles to pick one up , got home and one had been delivered ,then postman bought one,dh is sure jayden playing tricks.
hope everyone ok,

How you doing Hazy ? I hope your ok and that your dd has been ok today too xx

TW you're right, the anticipation feels so odd and just creeps up on you when you're not expecting it... recommend a nice glass of wine (or three!) and some chocolate - that goes for you too Hazy - can you tell i'm leading by example?! - i'm such a lightweight!!!!!

Shabs you've been quiet this week - I'm thinking you're needing wine and choc too?!

Hey Tink hope your bbq went well and you managed to relax? I dread going out with folk who don't 'get' me but often find that once i'm there i'm ok.

And congratulations to Chegirl - am really pleased for you xx

Yunno, sometimes all it seems like i do is moan, but i'm not doing so good today. I found out a lady that i used to go to school with was killed in a house fire last night. She'd managed to rescue two of her sons, and had gone back in for her four year old daughter. Neither of them made it out. It's just so sad, so tragic, and such a fucking waste. One of her sons is in intensive care at the moment, and it's not looking good for him at all.

For some reason it seems to have hit me really hard.

A link to my thread about it here

Oh Dee - I noticed your thread earlier but didn't know what to say. I saw the news coverage of it on tv earlier today.

I dont understand it, dont want to understand it and never will understand why such awful stuff happens like this.

Sending my love and thoughts xxxx

Hiya Dee Just got in and noticed your thread, love and hugs winging their way to you from me. xxxx

Oh Dee that's tragic.

The saying 'the good die young' is a load of bollocks really, but I try and draw comfort from it.

love and light to us all xxxx

Morning girls xx

G'morning Shabbs, how you feeling today?

I'm still feeling a little delicate, tbh. Just making sure i've got my fire escape plan sorted. Need to go and buy a hammer.

dee thats awful,im so sorryx hope everyone ok .im glad today is here,had busy day at work ,easier todayxx
dd2 is hopefully having granddaughters tonite for dd1 to have a break

about 6 years ago we met a family from Preston while we were on holiday in Faliraki. We have met up again 3 times for our holidays and they come down and visit us. Lyndsey and her friend, Martha, are currently there and sounded like they were having a ball. On Thursday Marthas dad died He cant have been very old because she is only 30. They are due to fly home on Wednesday but she is trying desperatly to get a flight tonight. Takis, the hotel owner, will be so sad for her - Martha is an outgoing, bubbly girl who lights up a room when she walks into it. She sounds distraught - poor girl

Morning xx

Good morning all , how we all doing ?
I hope you are feeling better this morning Shabs x

Morning girls - bit better this morning xx