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Bereavement

Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters. See also your choices after baby loss.

Original poster

My DH has died

218 replies

squidgemum · 20/11/2008 19:31

My beautiful DH died in my arms on Saturday aged 37, after an 18 month battle with cancer. I'm left with a 3 year old and a 1 month old ... and I still can't believe I am writing these words. I know some other MNetters have been through this too as I've been lurking for a while - Martianbishop, retiredgoth, onlyjoking, evenstar ... are you there? I've been reading your posts for months now (ever since he was declared terminal) but never had the courage to post before, but I know that you and others will know what I'm going through - the shock, the fear of the future, and some relief that the cruel disease is no longer a constant shadow in the house .. Tell me - is there any light at the end of the tunnel?

OP posts:
Wezzle · 20/11/2008 22:28

So sorry for your loss

Hassled · 20/11/2008 22:28

I'm so sorry - I lost my mother to cancer but can't begin to imagine what you're going through. What I do know is that you'll have lots and lots of support here - we'll be thinking of you.

sweetkitty · 20/11/2008 22:29

So so so sorry for your loss

Wishing you the strength and courage to get through this toughest of times x

SoupDragon · 20/11/2008 22:30

Oh I'm so sorry to hear this. you'll get good advice and support from here.

x

Pinkchampagne · 20/11/2008 22:31

So sorry to hear of your loss.

Twink · 20/11/2008 22:34

Am so sorry to hear this, am in floods as I type. Dh & I are at the beginning of your battle right now and I just want to hug you cos I know within a short space of time I'll be writing a similar message.

Kxx

solo · 20/11/2008 22:35

Life is very cruel. I'm so sorry for your loss.x

onlyjoking9329 · 20/11/2008 22:37

sorry to hear you are facing the same stuff twink, i have seen you around but don't know your background, do CAT me id you want to chat.

spottyzebrahasthelurgy · 20/11/2008 22:44

oj thanks for that post it really makes you think, i will try to remember the good advice on that.
people tend to think of don't say anything you will upset him/her, but that just hurts them more.

Gingerbear · 20/11/2008 22:47

so sorry for your loss squidgemum. My dad died 4 months ago, and I know how hard it is for my mum, I cannot comprehend how it is for you with a young family. Wishing you love. Please contact WAY and Yorkiegirl when you feel ready. You will gets lots of support here.

MummyDoIt · 20/11/2008 22:49

Squidge, I'm so sorry to hear this. I'm one of the ones who knows exactly what you're going through. I lost my DH to cancer in August. He was only 43. I have two young boys, age 5 and 4. All I can say at the moment is just take each day as it comes and don't try to think too far ahead. CAT me if there's anything you need or I can do for you. If there's any practical advice I can give you or just a shoulder to cry on, I'm here for you.

Tortington · 20/11/2008 22:51

so sorry , thinking of you xxx

sandcastles · 20/11/2008 22:51

So very sorry for your loss.

MrsNormanMaine · 20/11/2008 22:58

I am sorry too.

As time goes on you will find him, sometimes unexpectedly, in your little ones. Take care of yourself.
xx

HeinzSight · 20/11/2008 22:59

Squidge, am so so so so sorry to hear of your loss

twink, sorry to hear you're going through an awful time.

Aitch · 20/11/2008 23:01

oh squidge, how heartbreaking.

ja9 · 20/11/2008 23:04

squidge, so so sorry for you. it seems life is so fragile... praying for you and your dc.

Flaneuse · 20/11/2008 23:10

I'm so sorry for your loss, and wish you and your family strength and peace.

PeachyAndTheSucklingBas · 20/11/2008 23:14

I am so sorry for your loss, especially at a time when you should be celebrating your new baby. You poor soul

MN will be here for you.

giraffescantdancethetango · 20/11/2008 23:16

so sorry x

AbricotsSecs · 20/11/2008 23:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

debzmb62 · 20/11/2008 23:25

squuidge hi i,m debbie i to lost my husband to cancer be it 10 years ago i know how you must be feeling i truely do he also was 37 and he had testacular cancer my heart is with you at the very sad time thinking of you and your family xx
if you need to get in touch feel free to mail me @ [email protected]

Spidermama · 20/11/2008 23:26

So sorry squidgemum.

I'm glad you were holding him when he passed .... I'm also glad he lived to meet his second child .... but oh how terribly hard for you with a one month old.

Love and best wishes. xx

tibni · 20/11/2008 23:30

So sorry for your loss

Evenstar · 20/11/2008 23:30

Squidgemum I am so very sorry for your loss,I hope that you have plenty of RL support, take up every bit that you are offered. Try to eat something and make sure you drink plenty and keep well hydrated especially as your baby is so small. I will CAT you in case you want to talk, there is no time limit on that whenever you feel ready. Sending you love and strength to get through these difficult days to come. We are here for you, keep posting and I will check in on you on here. Take care x

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