For Bereaved Mummies. Remembering Jack and our other precious little ones... the sharing of hurt is the beginnning of healing.

[lottiejenkins]

Third time lucky........ Thanks to Shabs and FMN. I hope i can carry the baton as well as you did. I havent made a good start though. Things can only get better.........

Good night girls xxxx

shabster if you are still up can you have a look on the relationships section.

Thank you love. Message posted. Am off to bed. Many thanks

so thanks for responding, hard to know what to do or say in the face of such unbearable pain and I was at a loss.

but take care of yourself in the meantime, xxx

Morning all xxx I was a good girl last night when we went out and didnt drink too much!! My friends will all have monster hangovers but not meeeeeeeeeeeeee!!

Morning x

Good morning all, bright and breezy and happy thoughts today. The sun is shinging in Sheffield.
Much love to everyone and apologies for rambling on yesterday.
Love CM

Never apologise CM xx

Hi ladies! Dd1 gets home today - hooray! I've missed her shed loads! But I bet she'll be driving me potty within a few hours of getting home

Tiasmum, sorry I missed you yesterday. I just wanted to say a bit about how I got through after the funeral. I think, basically, I made myself busy. I went back to work about a week after the funeral, and I did lots of everyday life things - shopping, housework and probably too much getting drunk. I know this is far from how other people "do" things and I know lots of people couldn't even consider work for a long while, but it is what I did and I think it's done me OK. What I'm saying is, just try and take your own path, whatever it may be. Maybe you NEED to spend days or weeks at home sobbing, maybe you NEED to shut yourself away for a while. Or maybe you need to do "normal" things again like I did. For me, I think the hardest part is actually finding what your own way of coping is, cos until then you are still in that horrible limbo. xx

Charleymouse, I think it is lovely that your dh was interested enough about others, particularly "virtual" others. Men generally get a bad press on emotions but sometimes they surprise us!

afternoon girls big hugs to everyonex

Hi Everyone. Hope you are all okay.

Feedmenow - just saw your post for Christmas decorations. I've been wanting to do something for Noah and I thought of having a special bauble with his name on it, (most seems to have babies 1st Christmas on them but have found some that will just put a name) and also getting one for DD so that every christmas she can put them up and he will be there with us. Usually I get really excited about Christmas but I just can't this year as like Eris Noah should have been here too and it just seems so hard at the moment to contemplate just going to visit his grave on the day when he should have been at home with us.

Hope you girls are all okay and have a good weekend. I think we are just going to have a quiet one here.

Tia's Mummy - how are you today? Like others have said it does really help if you can keep busy. It really was the last thing I wanted to do (when I just wanted to curl up in a corner) but it did really help and I have some lovely friends who I saw regulary. I think in the run up to the funeral there is always so much to do and there are so many people around and the phone never stopped ringing but afterwards we found there was nothing to do and people just stopped calling. People expected us to 'get back to normal and move on' But the friends that did stick around really made the difference. Don't worry about next week, Just take on day at the time. Sorry to have waffled on. xxxx

ooh me ??.. thats lovely .. thank you .. cant believe we are heading for 1000 on this thread.. seems like no time since you started this one lottie

tiasmummy I couldnt face going back to work after I lost Fraser... took me a couple of months. For those few months all I thought about was Fraser.. I nearly drove myself mad

the day I went back when I went for lunch I realised I hadnt had time to think about Fraser for a few hours and I actually felt a little better. Of course I went home and broke my heart but at least I had some relief.

At least we will all have each other to help us through xmas this year..

can I ask does everyone else go visit their little one's garden on xmas morning ?

oh and on a brighter note... I gave up serving Ross vegetables a few months ago cos he always refused them. Over the last few days I have served fireman power pods (peas) super duper builder pods of power(sweetcorn)and buzz lightyear laser bolts (carrots)and he has scoffed them all

hi we have gone to cemetry on christmas day as does my dd x i dont like to leave him out if you know what i mean x

I cant remember the last time I went to my boys grave. I dont want to go. They are not there. They are all around me. I am struggling like mad at the moment to stop my smile from sliding off my face, to be honest. x

Eris is at home with us, so I don't need to go anywhere but here. But, like Shabs, I feel her all around me in everything beautiful I see.

Dd1 made it home safe and sound, and seems like she had a wonderful time. I nearly blubbed as the coach pulled in (damn hormones again!) but managed to control myself. Although I just had to stop myself crying at an episode of Hannah Montana - what is wrong with me!!!!!

Anyone got any exciting plans for the weekend? The sun is hsining here so we should make the most of it, but I doubt we'll have time for out-doorsy. Hopefully off to paint some pottery for PIL's anniversary next weekend, then baking them a heart shaped cake to freeze ready for decorating next Saturady. Tomorrow we have the FD's church service - I don't really feel like going now but have PIL's and SIL coming . But think will do as someone suggested - sit at the back so I can escape if I want to.

Hiya girls xx

Morning all xxxxxxxx

Hi all

Shabs I hope you are feeling a bit better today . You sound on a bit of a slide .

I don't go to the cemetry much now at all . I don't feel him there and it just makes me sob to see it written down like that . I used to go every day pretty much for about 18 mths then once a week for a while and now I can't remember the last time I went . I feel wuilty because it is probably a mess but I know I will crash after going so I will keep putting on the smile and pretending for a wee bit longer .

I hope everyone is doing ok today

xx

Hiya TW - I'll be ok love.....not sure when....but I will!!

thanks for the honest answers girls..

This makes me feel better because for the 1st time I just feel I dont want to go xmas morning..

anything in particular shabs??

fmn crying at the safe arrival back of your dd is not hormonal.. its the normal reaction of a loving caring mum. However crying at hannah monta might just be hormonal!!!

tiasmummy are you holding up

hugs to everyone else

hi girls x hope everyone okxx

Been home ages girls....Hazy you made me ROFL with your texts tonight....you should write a book. xxx

i could have illed him last week i was like a zombie at work sunday morningx

Morning girls xx

Everybody ok?