It's my daughters birthday today

[naynayisay]

She should be three. She died unexpectedly in her sleep last November from misdiagnosed bronchiolitis.

I don't know what to do with myself. We're going up to her grave to put up a little fence and lay down some flowers later. I don't know how to honour her without crying all day. I don't feel like I can face anyone or anything.

I miss her so much. The older children have been fine in the run up to her birthday (10 and 13) and DH is being strong. I feel like I'm the only one who's screaming inside.

Oh I am so so so sorry. I wish her a happy birthday and send you big hugs. Poor wee thing - she was clearly much loved. Am sure the whole family is struggling but trying each in their way to hold it together. Sometimes you just can’t afford to let your feelings go, and maybe they feel like that.

I would love to hear about her. What did she like? What did you especially love about her?

I'm so sorry. Sending much love today.

Your plans to mark your daughters birthday sound lovely and I hope that it can help you to get through today. You may have already visited this site it a charity run by bereaved parents www.TCF.org.Uk (the compassionate friends) where there are lots of free helpful leaflets to view online and one in particular is a larger downloadable handbook called RememberingYour Child.

So sorry

I am so sorry.

I am so sorry for your loss. I cannot imagine having to live with such pain: your love for your daughter shines out from your words. If there is a space where you can safely express some of those overwhelming emotions, I hope you can access it. If not, are there small ways that you can let some of it out safely, surrounded people who will lovingly but discreetly watch over you?
I don't know you and never knew your daughter but I will remember her, and you, in that tomorrow may bring.

Oh, OP. My heart breaks reading this. I’m so sorry. What was your daughter’s name? I’d also love to hear more about her. Your plans sound lovely for her. I’m sending love and prayers and wishing you all the strength in the world. Xxx

Her name was Wyatt Rose but we always just called her Woo or Bug. Her grandfather called her Rosie. She was the brightest, zaniest little thing and she loved animals. She'd take any food she'd have and slip it down the side of her for the dog or feed him in the hall when she was out of sight. She'd beg to watch Frozen 2 over and over and so many nights we were up at 3am watching one of the Frozen films or the short films they made. At her funeral we played the soundtrack from Frozen and I haven't been able to listen to the songs or even look at the characters on merchandise since. She was just an all around lovely kid and we were so excited to see who she'd become.

We're so incomplete without her. Every day is hard but as the months roll on with her absence it seems to be getting harder rather than easier. I feel like I pushed it all down and away in the early days just to survive and now it's coming back and making me feel it.

Everyone misses her dearly, I know that. My husband is very stoic and they were the best of friends so I think the pain is too much for him to feel right now. But it comes in waves, heavier and heavier each time, and I just want people to know she existed and she is so very loved.

I'm so sorry.

I remember her. I think you posted around the time she passed. Maybe I saw something about her on Facebook too?

She’s a gorgeous little thing. Your pain is clear from your posts. I’m so sorry this terrible thing happened to your family. I think if you want to wail and cry all day, if that’s what you need, then just do that.

Yes, I name changed after. She was taken into hospital via ambulance for breathing difficult but the doctor in A&E sent her home with antibiotics for tonsillitis. A day and a half later we woke up to find her passed away in her cot.

It's been hell. I wish she was here.

I also remember her ❤️ And have thought of you often

Thank you for sharing these precious words and photos of your very beautiful daughter. She sounds like an absolutely wonderful and funny, sweet girl and she clearly brought the world a ton of personality in the short time she could.

I can’t begin to imagine your unbearable pain and suffering. My parents lost their son, my brother, in adulthood & I would do anything to take the pain away from a parent suffering a cruel loss of this kind.

Your darling girl will always be remembered by you & others. She made her own unique mark on the world which will always remain true. Sending you hope & light & strength for the future.

Beautiful girl. I'm so sorry.

I remember you and Wyatt Rose both. I often think about you and your family.
Sending so much love on her special day 💐❤️

She is absolutely beautiful. It hurts me to even imagine your pain. You and your husband are absolute fucking warriors.
Sending you all the love in the world. I'll keep you in my prayers xx

I am so very sorry. She looks the most sparky, intelligent, vibrant little girl in those beautiful photos - you can so clearly see what a strong and endearing character is shining from them. Thank you for sharing them with us.

I remember your thread about Wyatt Rose at the time. She looks like an amazing little girl, the world must feel all wrong without her in it .

I saw a BBC video pop up on facebook today about grief. It was saying how people used to think that grief got smaller over time. But now we know it stays the same size, it's just that very gradually our lives stretch out further than the grief so that there is some space to survive in outside of the pain and loss. There will always be anniversaries, birthdays etc where your life shrinks back to the size of the grief and that is all you can think about. It sounded like it made sense.

Sorry if this sounds insensitive or not the right thing, but would it help you to get/make a little birthday cake for her and sing her happy birthday. Maybe just by yourself if our can't face anyone else?

I remember your post about her too last year. What a beautiful child. Please stay strong. I'm sure she wouldn't want you to be upset. I really believe all our lost children are watching over us and playing together...waiting for us with God. It's okay to grieve...grieve as much as you want but please know that she'd want her mummy and daddy to be happy.

Did anything happen to the doctor who misdiagnosed it?

I remember reading about her after she passed and feeling so desperately sad for you and your family. She was such a beautiful wee soul and I can’t imagine how you must miss her.

I’m so very, very sorry. I’ll be thinking of you on her special day

@naynayisay

Yes, I name changed after. She was taken into hospital via ambulance for breathing difficult but the doctor in A&E sent her home with antibiotics for tonsillitis. A day and a half later we woke up to find her passed away in her cot.

It's been hell. I wish she was here.

Oh I remember that post.

It occassionally comes to my mind

I'm really really so sorry.

I've just shed a tear for her, and for you, and I'm a stranger. I can't imagine how painful it must be for you. Wishing you strength to get through the day.

I remember you and your little girl too and those heartbreaking posts.
I'm so sorry for what happened and love those photos, her personality shines right out of them.
Hope you're able to do something nice for her birthday

What a gorgeous little girl. I’m so, so sorry for your loss. I will be thinking about your beautiful, sparky Wyatt Rose and your family today.