My husband has died

[peachgreen]

He died today. He was 42. He had recently been diagnosed with a heart condition and spent a month in hospital but we believed he was going to be okay. He went upstairs for a rest and they think he had a heart attack. He didn't cry out, they think it would have been fairly instant. I found him when I went to check on him a few hours later and I knew he had gone, I did CPR but I knew it was too late.

He was my soul mate, my other half, the true love of my life. We have a little girl who is almost 3. If it wasn't for her I would kill myself. I can't imagine life ever having any meaning without him.

I’m so sorry op.
Please let your family take care of you and your little girl.

This has made my heart ache. I'm so so sorry. X

I am so sorry Peach. He was clearly such a special man and the way you speak about him on your other thread says so much about how much you mean and meant to each other. He will live on through your little girl. Just take it 10 minutes at a time, don't think further ahead for now.

Sincere condolences to you, your daughter and the rest of the family.

I'm so sorry for you loss x

So sorry for you, it must have been such an awful shock. Feel for you during such a terribly difficult time. Sending you strength and love.

Oh, peachgreen. I remember your other threads about his illness. I’m so, so very sorry for your loss. Life is shit sometimes. Sending love 💔

I am so so sorry, Mike was a truly special man and will be forever in your heart. There is so much great advice on here. Please keep talking when you need to xxxx

I'm so sorry for your loss. Nothing can be said that will make this better for you at the moment but please know that at some point this won't feel so overwhelming. Please reach out for help if you need it.

I'm so sorry, we're also 42 and are young and it shouldn't have happened to your lovely husband. Sometimes life is very unfair and my heart aches for you.
I imagine having a three year old will be both helpful and really hard right now.
Lots of love and as others have said just take it in very short bursts and let people look after you too.

I am so very very sorry. I too am widowed, nearly three years now. It is a club none of us wanted to join.
Huge hugs to you and your daughter. Again I am so incredibly sorry and I really wish I could hug you in person xxx

@peachgreen I'm so so sorry for your loss. We will light a candle for Mike and you, your daughter and family tonight. We are all here and listening any time you need it.

I didn't want to read and run. I know it doesn't feel like it now op but this will get easier. You just need to keep going any way you can. I lost someone too, 22 years ago. I thought my world had ended. Time doesn't make us forget but it does dull the pain. I had some great friends and family who helped me through and it sounds like you do too. Lean on them. Talk to them. Let them carry you. This is raw and you need to grieve, however works for you. There is no right or wrong way.

Op - heartfelt condolences. You won’t even imagine this now but you will get through.
Support absolutely as much as is possible from an unknown mnetter. Please please use boards as much as you want to/find useful. I had tremendous support going through two recent bereavements. I’ll never be able to thank some on here enough for that.

I’m so very sorry for your loss Peach I hope you have people with you to look after you and your DD

I am so so sorry.

I am so sorry for your loss and for that of your child, it's far too young. My OH died in similar circumstances at the start of lockdown and it's dreadful to walk into that room and know what you're looking at. I hope that you and your child have lots of people who can comfort and help you, keep strong for your daughter.

So sorry for your sad loss. I followed your other post about your wonderful husband and your love for him shone through in every post you wrote. I cannot imagine how you must be feeling right now, but we are here all thinking of you. Take care of yourself and your DD. I wish I could say something to help but no words will ease your pain at the moment. You are in my thoughts OP. Sending love to you and DD.

Will it really ever become bearable? That seems impossible just now. Life without him is utter blackness and bleakness.

I’m really sorry op I’d kept an eye on your original case as you updated and saw he was home
I can’t believe it and can’t understand the pain you must feel but in response your latest message You know you have to go on for your daughter, find strength in her

I hope you have family with you today

So, so sorry for your loss

I remember your ICU thread too and am so sorry to hear about Mike. I have no words of wisdom but I am thinking of you and your little girl and praying for you. Lean on those around you

So sorry for your loss 💐💐

It will become bearable but you won’t even be able to see or understand that at all now op. Don’t worry about that. One day at a time. One minute at a time. Support. Your dh would want nothing more than for you and your dd to be ok. Sometimes that was the only thought that kept me going. It’s a strong thought which might help in a bit.

@peachgreen
Your ability to cope expands but the pain remains the same (sorry). At the moment you will be a huge mixture of pain and emotions. It will be all you can do to survive your next breath, the emotional toll is so huge.
I can vividly recall just trying to get through my next breath for hours on end, and then it would lift and I would have periods where the pain allowed me to function to a degree.
It literally is one moment at a time for quite some time.
I am so very sorry. xxx