Support For Anyone Who Loses A Parent

[Mummylin]

We offer a shoulder and compassion for those that need it.

Hi All, I’m sorry for those that have just joined us and to those that have joined us again. ChristmasLightLover I know how you feel about making the school holidays count. I had such great plans for last summer before my Dad died. I was such a mess for the October half term, struggling with Christmas in December and working in February so this holiday I have been making a special effort.

It would have been / is my Dads birthday on 5th April. I have bought him/me a rose which my children are going to help me plant in our garden. I feel bad that I can’t be with my mum but we live 180 miles away. My son has also suggested that we get my Dad a cake. I’m not sure if it’s too much to sing happy birthday 🎂

Hi Jools . I myself am fine but my dh isn't. He has to go in for an op next week and it has been a troubling few weeks here with one thing and another. But hopefully after next week things will get back to some kind of normality. It has been an awful few weeks with one thing and another.
I am heartened to see you all supporting each other and being so welcoming to new posters. I am sure they all appreciate it. It makes such a difference to be able to chat to others in the same position, who know what you are going through.
Hopefully I will soon be back to posting " normally " again soon.
For everyone 💐💐💐

aah mummylin sorry to read you've had a tough time. I hope DH op goes well and you are soon back with us⚘

alibaba it would have been my dad's birthday next week too, aswell as my parents wedding anniversary.
I've realised that's why I'm so angry and snappy at the moment. I'm dreading those 2 days and I'm not really sure how to deal with it with my mum?

MyGuideJools it was my parents 50th wedding anniversary on 23rd March. It was an odd occasion because they didn’t celebrate their anniversary but I had said this time last year that we’d invite some of their friends over and I’d make a cake. My mum (who has early Alzheimer’s) has forgotten that so I decided to send her some yellow roses instead which she liked. Also because I don’t live near by I was never with my Dad for his birthday so I’m not feeling too bad about the event. We are going to celebrate by having a fun day out with my kids but I’m still going to send a card to my mum to mark the occasion. Xx

It would have been my parents anniversary tomorrow, they got married on Easter Saturday 😕 Another sad occasion to get through

it's tough isn't it time & alibaba I've decided to send mum some flowers on their anniversary just so she knows we havnt forgotten (as if!!)
Not sure what to do on dads birthday,. he loved birthdays and would always have a little family party.
I'm dreading it

One year on from Mum leaving us. Where has the time gone?

I'm approaching the one year anniversary too. I keep dwelling on the fact that this time last year my dad was looking after my children while I was working over the Easter holidays. 2 months late he was gone. It was so sudden :(

Surprised at how upset I am this morning to realise now it’s April so my Dad died ‘last month’ ☹️☹️ The passing of time feels so cruel.

It is cruel isn't it? Only someone who is going through this would really understand.

I miss my Mum so much.

to everyone on this thread for Easter in memory of our loved ones.

I had been told that after the funeral is sometimes harder. Well for me that is definitely the case. Mums funeral was 29th March (my daughter did get to read that poem - She is Gone ☺) but I feel worse now. Its the overwealming loss I am struggling with as well as suddenly appearing to have a bad cold, sweats, eye infection and ulcers- nice!! DH says its the body reacting to stress? for all those strugglig today x

Hello to you all.Sorry to see.some new people on here.Yesterday dh and I went to see Dads daffodils.Mum planted them around the rugby club he followed and was photographer for twenty years.She planted them when he went terminal and was given months to live.Ironically he lived to see them come up!.
For some reason I feel more emotional today.Perhaps as I have a few days off to think.Also seeing Mum alone.with bills still pililing in for things she didn't subscribe to makes me angry...BT were notified dad had passed away yet still send him bills.
Anyone else finding spring a bit sad? Dad loved his garden.love to all on here.x

jools I didn't really know what to do if my mum was the surviving parent I might have bought flowers but somehow didn't see appropriate for my dad - especially with his allergies! His house was busy today with my sister & her children plus us & our teen. He did say you know it's our anniversary today - which of course I did - but it wasn't mentioned again 😕

I hope you all managed to have a good day. Mabellucieattwell I know what you mean about feeling that you lost your Dad last month. I absolutely hated it at new year because it meant that I now had to say that Dad died last year when it had only been 6 months. It felt as though I was leaving him behind in 2017 and I didn’t want to move in to 2018 without him. 😥

whatis yes my dad loved his garden too. mums not really interested in it now which makes me sad as he would be out there now doing all the spring time jobs.
timefor I understand, I don't think I would have bought dad flowers, but he always bought mum some so I'm doing it for him.

I was In floods of tears this morning. Really am missing dad at the moment, I think it's because there's so many reminders in April.
I just feel really down and on the verge of tears when I'm by myself

Oh my guide.I'm sorry.I'm similar in that today seemed.hard.Seeing DM alone all dressed up with no visitors broke my heart.I put her plants in and found a small precious bird feeder the grandkids.gave them.She recalled Dfs last night of pain and thrashing around.So sorry for her going through some mishandlings in his last two months in hospital.Now.to enjoy a few months of summer before the dreaded autumn when he passed away.
I'm going to see.if I can get to see.DM more.
Thinking of you all at this family time.x

thanks whatis Am i right in thinking we lost our dads at around the same time? 7 months ago.
I see mum a lot as she lives close by, and my DC pop in. But I'm struggling with working and making sure I see DM, I feel bogged down by it all but I do want to see her iykwim. I worry constantly about her being alone and I know that's what dad worried about too, so I'm doing it for him aswell as me.
It doesn't help that my sibling lives 4 hours drive away and phones her once a week, but that's a whole new thread!
I just feel really sad today, the worst I've felt since he died I think.

Yes myguide seven months on 11th.I don't want to do 50/55 hour weeks anymore.I'm probably struggling more knowing DM is...is loneliness not eating much.Losing someone AF er 54 years is so hard and df was such a decent bloke he did so much for her and everyone he knew.
Slumps are to be expected I guess.After all we knew them for so long.x

I hope that despite all the upsets and difficulties that the weekend has been bearable for you all. At my end we are gearing ourselves up for my dh to have an op on Wed. Not long and it will soon be over.
Thinking of you all 💐

⚘mummylin I hope DH surgery is a success on Wednesday.

Its about the same time for me too - it will be 8 months in a week or so since I lost my mum - I see my dad regularly & call when I don't see him-he was very down today & I feel bad after I've spoken to him, it's his birthday next week & he said today he wishes it would just be over

oh Time it's heartbreaking isn't it. I've never felt so much pain. I don't know what the answer is

Thanks mummylin hope the op goes smoothly for your dh.Time yes seeing our surviving parent struggle is awful isn't it?.I know my DM isn't mopping around however df was literally her other half.He took her out and listen to her woes generally fixed things and sorted out the bills.
Let's hope some sunshine will lift our spirits.Sometimes I feel alone....my work colleagues are men so after initial sympathies last year that
T is that and my other half never asks if I'm OK.when I asked if he missed my df he didn't answer.He knew him for thirty plus years though and they got on well..x

Dh,s op been cancelled last minute. Blood pressure too high. Has a week for it to go back down !