DH is dying

[WhereDoAllTheCalculatorsGo]

I don't even know what topic to put this in. My DH had a brain haemorrhage yesterday morning, the doctors have said it's not survivable. He's 60 years old and my best friend as well as my husband, we've been married for 23 years. I was sat at the bedside in ICU yesterday thinking that I wasn't going to post on mumsnet, even though like a lot of us I spend quite a bit of time here and feel like part of the community, but at 3 o'clock in the morning when you're all alone it seems like a good idea.
I got sent home from the hospital 'to try to get some sleep'.

Glad to hear you're eating. Low blood sugar often seems to be a trigger for my migraines which is why I mentioned it.

Take it easy on the G&T's. Do you have a friend that would enjoy a drink with you?

With all the talk of gin on MN, I have to be a bit careful not to drink as much as I'd like! (Especially midweek evenings alone). As an occasional treat, I have taken to having a pint or so of tonic and lots of fruit and cucumber and just a smidgen of gin, and that way I can enjoy it because it's 'good for me'!

Hope that the migraines are easing off. I woke up with one this morning, but it's eased off now. I hate it when I don't know what caused it.

Hope you are feeling (physically) better - problems with migraines are the last thing you need right now

Still thinking of you.

I am so sorry to hear the news. You are in my thoughts.

I am so moved by the woolly hugs thread I have been in bits all morning. (Plus I had a big row with the BIL but I don't want to talk about that as I am so identifiable) Thank you all.
I'm still bad with the migraines. Yesterday's came on at 9pm just when I was about to watch TV for a bit. I'm okay so far today.
DS has been advised by school to stay in sixth form for another year. The plan is to do 2 of his A levels this year and the other two next year. That will give us both time to come to terms with what has happened and be together for longer. We are both very pleased with this.

Talking of tv. Fecking Grey's Anatomy. Why is there always a superstar neurosurgeon who swoops in to save the life when everyone else has said no?
And that new show Critical with their 'major haemorrhage protocol' And Rory Kinnear dying of a brain haemorrhage in The Casual Vacancy.
I think I will stick to the Walking Dead in future. You know where you are with Zombies.

Sorry you've had a bad morning, pesky relatives - try mentally shutting a door on them - it might help to 'park' it until you feel upto conversing with them again.
That's a great suggestion by your DS's school. They sound very caring and thoughtful.

Hope your day is going well. XX

Sending a hug just to say i will be thinking of you and your family. I saw your woolly hugs thread. Tempted to have a go at crocheting a square for your blanket. As I haven't done any crafting for 15 years it may be the slightly dodgy one.... x

olympicsrock that's very kind. I am planning to learn how to crochet so that I can contribute to other people's blankets in the future. I'm not a very crafty person so they might be a bit hit and miss!
I figured that a crochet class would be good for me on a number of levels though.

I haven't posted much in this thread but keep up with the thread and think of you often Calc.

Calc

I'm so very sorry for your loss I've just learnt about it through Woolly Hugs and I will contribute to your blanket.
sending you massive hugs

Hello Calculators, just checking in. Xxxx

Ps, good news about your son's school. Hope you have a migraine free night. Love xx

Calc, hope you're managing to keep on keeping on

Personally, I feel privileged if I can contribute to the Woolly Hugs, even if the sentiment may be tinged with 'There but for the grace of God, go I', I think it IS an expression of how MN is a community.
Don't feel there's is any need for you to do anything at all for them, but do learn to crochet/knit if you want as it can be v therapeutic

Yes, I've signed up for a Crochet for beginners course at the local college. It's not for a couple of months but I will look forward to it.
It's my birthday on Friday :(

Aw, Calc, you'll have so many painful 'firsts' - I am so sorry.
You will get through them because there is no choice and life will carry on.
It is so, so hard. I hope you have support around you and can find a way forward without your DH

Ooh, crochet, or even plain knitting, sounds great Calc. You're inspiring me ....
Thinking of you. Pleased to hear of school's suggestion for your ds - that sounds good x

Another one here who hopes you're managing to keep on keeping on as Pacific says

Yes, very much 'there but for the grace of God go I', my feelings exactly!

I learned crochet to help me through a difficult patch, and it has kept me going through some very troubled waters. I'm still a beginner really, but do.love to see the woolly hugs when they come together. The combination of different styles of crochet and knitting (I can't knit, and know others can't crochet) makes them look so much of a lovely colaboration, even at a glance.

So glad that your DS's school has been helpful and understanding, calculators.

Pic, hope you don't mind

Oh Calcs. I am so so sorry for your loss. If it's any consolation you sound like such a lovely woman and mother - which ony makes my heart ache all the more for you

I am sending you vibes for some dcenet sleep tonight

And thank you for sharing the pic. He looks happy doing something he loved

A picture paints a thousand words.

That really is a great photo. He looks happy.

A really lovely pic

What a great photo - thank you for sharing it with us

Lovely photo, brought tears to my eyes

Thinking of you

I need people to stop expecting me to do something or be somewhere. How can I tell people to leave me alone?
I've got a massive list of things I need to do and deadlines. Tomorrow is timed with military precision so that I can pick people up and go to people's houses. But I'm not even sure I can make it into the shower and down the stairs.
fuckers