My brother was murdered last night.

[MetallicHighlights]

That's it, really. He was stabbed to death on his doorstep. Just been staring at the photo of his house with the forensic tent outside on the BBC website.

I've been spamming FB with maudlin photos but reckon my friends there have probably had enough by now, so have come here to rant instead.

DD (14) adored him. She is being very brave. DS doesn't know yet as it's his 5th birthday today and I wanted him to have one more day of fun before he learns that life is shit.

So how do we get through this?

Honey, my heart goes out to you and your family. What a terrible loss. I can't imagine how you feel but I expect you might be hurting very badly. My arms are reaching out to hug you ((())))...xx

I'm really sorry about your brother. I hope you take this in the spirit it is given, but having lost someone who died in a manner that attracted press intrusion, be aware that this thread may be used in a way you don't want it to be. I'm so sorry :(

Still awake. Thanks again for hugs and kind words, and for everyone who has suffered losses.

ZeeTeam, thanks for your concern. I'm aware this is a possibility so am carefully not mentioning any details of the attack not already in the press. If they want to report that my pillows are dusty or Jon had a castle fetish then so be it.

They could also report that ice packs have no effect on puffy eyes, and that food just gets vomited back up.

Hey, I'm sorry you're not getting a rest. Would you want to try lying down with a hot damp washcloth folded over your eyes? Warm things always make us feel cared-for so it may help you relax enough to sleep. I hope so.

Goodness, I always get the time difference wrong -- I really hope by now you have fallen asleep.

Thanks KeatsiePie, I managed almost an hour then woke up with the wind rattling the tiles. Was convinced for a moment that something had happened to DS and I had to go and tell Jon! Small boy will be awake soon so no point trying to sleep again.

Aaaaand he's awake. Deep breath.

Just keep swimming metallic. You're in shock as well as grieving. Be kind to yourself. Maybe your GP would be able to help with sleeping?

Oh no! Sorry you didn't get more rest. I hope you'll see your parents today? I imagine it will be a really, really hard day but good for you to be with them, and good for your kids too.

Thinking of you this morning Metallic x

So sorry for your loss. Be strong x

How unbelievably dreadful. I'm so sorry for your loss.

Small boy has tried to get his head round the never seeing again bit and is most concerned that Santa won't be able to find Uncle Jon to deliver his presents. Followed by panic that me and his sister are going to die as well. Followed by a request for sugar puffs for breakfast "to help with the sad". Loving his logic. DD being fantastic. Packing now.

Oh metallic I am so so sorry to hear this. How utterly awful for you all. I am sending some hugs and strength to you all xx

so sorry for your loss x

I'm so so sorry.

What an awful thing to happen - so sorry for you and your family.

Metallic, young children tend to dip in and out of grief, so your DS being upset and then wanting Sugar Puffs is what you'd expect, bless him.

Thinking of you today x.

What a terrible heartbreaking thing to happen. It is just awful.

OP I cannot offer much in the terms of practical advice as have obviously never been through the same but please know that I am thinking of you. Xx

I am so s sorry op. you're doing a great job with your ds.

X

Im so so sorry for your loss x

I'm so very sorry for your loss...he sounds like a truely lovely guy. Just be very gentle with yourself going forwards, survival mode til things settle a bit. Thinking of & praying for you & all your family.