''Even the smallest of footprints have the power to leave an everlasting imprint on the Earth'' Remembering with love our darling children

[Whatevertheweather]

Remembering not only what we have lost but what our darling children have given to us.

A new 'safe haven' thread. Thank you Chip for our last one which filled up in just a month. A sure sign of lots of tears, smiles and wonderful support.

All our children have taught us something whether they were born sleeping, lived just a little while, weeks, months or years. Here are mine:

Never ever take anything for granted, life can change very quickly.
Listen to yourself; your instincts will nearly always be right.
That it is possible to function seemingly normally with a broken heart.
That I have a wonderful relationship that can withstand the hardest of times.
That love and support can come from the most unexpected sources.
That I have a lot of very lovely friends, new and old.
That my family is amazing.
That no matter what it is impossible not to smile and laugh with my beautiful Katie around.
That a rainbow can provide hope in the darkest of times.
That there will be good days and bad days
That I love my children more than I ever thought possible.

For all our darling children xxx

Lavandes....this time I will not be keeping my mouth closed when I have questions - you have been warned LOL

Waves to Shabs from behind the settee x

FM I'm still here but have been mainly lurking on S&B. I've had a lot of 6 month anniversaries recently, which hit me hard, but they're all over now. Can't believe that it's been over half-a-year.

Chip The laptop is all fixed, was the same week, but haven't wanted to come here (see above). Thank you btw xx

MrsY I've not even considered a gravestone yet. There were none in the baby section, where Tamsin is buried, until a couple of weeks ago. I guess I need to think about it now.

Hi to everyone. I've taken DD1 out loads this week (in this lovely sunshine). It is her second birthday soon, and I don't know how to celebrate it tbh. I ^know we should have a party, and maybe invite some toddler group friends, but my heart isn't in it. Last year she had a big birthday, and I was so looking forward to this one, and having another little one crawling around :(

Hey Shabs who you calling old????

I am here .. I agree there is something odd about this thread.. not sure I can put my finger on it.. but there is something odd..

however to walk away would be soo wrong

I had nowhere to talk about my lovely first born son till feedmenow very bravely posted about her little Eris

I would hate to see the thread implode or just die a natural death.. to me this this is Eris's legacy

I am sure feedmenow would rather Eris's legacy was the cure for cancer or something equally bold but at least something nice came out of feedmenow's heartache and I think it would be a tragedy if we walked away

so here I am ..

Agree with every word of your post FM....there was nowhere before on MN that was as special as this thread. We are not just 'oldies' but I reckon we are 'mouldy oldies' well you are

This thread saved my sanity when we lost Richard. I had no-one who really understood. I will never forget the love and support I have had from all the lovely mums here. So I will be here to help if I can. ccc

didnt take you long to feel comfortable again did it ???

Room for a wee one ?

I have been hiding too but I have been reading and worrying and thinking of you all x

I agree about the weirdness but now we can all get back to doing what we do best .

Sometimes being a hand to good and sometimes being the hand that passes the wine x

Speaking of which! and I'm so very glad to see you all back!

Finally got the lap top back bloody Tom has an amazing Mac PC in his bedroom but he takes over this crappy lap top every night and sits downstairs with me - scared of missing anything my Mum used to say. Its sooooo hot here tonight...got a sweaty moustache and everything x

Fetching image, there shabs!

Did you all know that most babies survive being born prem? Pearl of wisdom today from a dhac. Oh, and that it's the parents' choice when a baby is being discharged. Funny, didn't feel like it was my choice when I was being bundled out the door with my tiny little girl.

whats a dhac???

and how does that statistic tie in with 17 kids being stillborn or dying within the first few moments of birth every day in the uk alone???

Sorry to trot that stat out again but I think it should be headline news..

Don't Have a Clue, frasers. Just a client in work and I'm not sure if she thought she was being helpful!

chip little 'pearls of wisdom' like that, should be kept in the mind of the dhac, I'm so sorry you encountered that (((hugs))) xx

FM dhac = 'don't have a clue', people we've all (unfortunately) encountered.

chip even if she was trying to help, she didn't, maybe she would be wise to learn this -

?It is better to be thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt? xx

the thing is, she is actually very nice! A very sweet person who, from what I know, goes out of her way to help others. Just don't think tact is her thing!

People said stuff to me like 'if your DS3 had survived that accident he would have had no quality of life' and 'your DTwinS has no more suffering to go through.' At least those people voiced their feelings to me. At least they had thought about it. People who have not lost a child are both very lucky and blessed AND obviously clueless. Why would they know what to say? I know that to us it is annoying but at least they have thought about it. I think that is a time to nod and smile at them.

shabs, someone said that to me about Sylvie-Rose, that had she survived she would have been a "vegetable". This was the same lady that "understood" because her dog died! I think she may have been one of the ones who hadn't thought about it! Thing is, I would take whatever form of Sylvie-Rose there was. I have a cousin with a severely disabled child. Taking care of him takes up her whole life. But she dreads, dreads, dreads that he might be taken from her. Your child is your child.

9 months today since our world fell apart. Feels like yesterday. Think today is going to be one of those days where it hurts a lot. We love you and miss you every day baby Erin xxxx

Whatever Huge (((hugs))). Thinking of you & beautiful Erin xx

Whatever xx Remembering Erin

Afternoon.

Whatever - thinking about you today. x

whatever I hope you're okay. Thinking about you and Erin today.

ladies, I had a very surreal experience last night.
I was at a friends house and she was having a pamper party. I had my nails done and as the beautician was doing them we were talking about how small our city is and how everyone knows everyone else. She start to tell me this story of how she was giving a lady a massage one day after the funeral of a wee boy who lived around here and she found out later that her sister in law was at the same funeral. She even looked up at me and said "you probably heard about it, his parents were teachers."
I held it together but my heart was racing. I didn't tell her and I went into the next room and whispered that nobody should mention it was me if she brought it up with them.

Hi ladies x

Thinking of you and your family today whatever these anniversary days are so difficult xx