'The mention of my child's name may bring tears to my eyes, but it never fails to bring music to my ears' - bereaved parents thread.

[DawnOfTheDeementedDead]

'PLEASE SAY THEIR NAMES'

The time of concern is over. No longer are we asked how we're doing. Never are the names of our children mentioned to us. A curtain descends. The moment has passed. Life's slip from frequent recall. There are exceptions: close and compassionate friends, sensitive and loving family. Still look. Still ask. Still listen. Thank God for them. For most, the drama is over. The spotlight is off. Applause is silent.

But for us the play will never end. The effects on us are timeless. What can be said, you ask? Please say "their names" to us. Love does not die. Their names are written on our lives. You may feel that they are dead. We feel that they are of the dead and still they live. They ghost-walk our souls, beckoning in future welcome. You say, "They were our children"; we say "They are". Please say "their names" to us and say "their names" again. It hurts to bury their memory in silence. What they were in flesh is no longer with us. What they are in spirit stays within us always. They were of our past but they are part of our now. They are our hope for the future. Please understand we cannot forget. We would not if we could.

We know that you cannot know, yesterday we were like you. Understand that we dwell in both flesh and spirit. We do not ask you to walk this road. The ascent is steep and the burden heavy. We walk it not by choice. We would rather walk it with them in the flesh, looking not to spirit worlds beyond. We are what we have to be. What we have lost, you cannot feel. What we have gained you may not see. Please say " their names" for they are alive. We will meet them again, although in many ways we've never parted. Their spirits play light songs, appear in sunrises and sunsets. They are real and shadow, they were and they are.

Please say "their names" to us and say "their names" again.
They are our children and we love them as we always did.
More each day.

'PLEASE, SAY THEIR NAMES'

In memory of my darling forever-baby Ciaran. I loved you from the moment i saw those two pink lines, and i'll love you til i draw my last breath as a wizened old woman of 103. You taught me what it was to truly love, and although you could only stay such a short time, you made me a better person and my world a better place. I'm so glad to have known you.

Don't I know it shabba still can't believe how hard it hit me this year.

{{hugs}} all round

Hi ladies xx Husband gone to bed but I am still wide awake. I know if I go to bed now I will be awake for hours xx

Hey, Lavandes!

Hey Chip are you up? x

Morning girls xx

morning, shabba!

Sorry, lavandes, I was up at that time but ended up going to bed very shortly after.

All very quiet today.

I had a dream about Sylvie-Rose last night. She was a little older and I was feeding her purees. (I know, I know BLW is better!) I do find myself reading MN threads about breastfeeding and weaning and then feeling because those threads should be relevant to me and they're not.

Dh is getting a bit worried about me as I am doing a lot of online searching for things spiritual and wondering if there are, in fact, any genuine mediums out there. I would just like to know for sure that she is OK but at the same time think there are a lot of people out there who prey on Mums like us so am afraid to go to anyone.

I do feel that I get little clues from her, like electrical things switching themselves off, I got her scent in the hallway unexpectedly one day and dh and I have both thought we felt a little touch but maybe I'm just losing it?

Chipmonkey, since Oliver passed away I have been going to spiritualist meetings. I have had 2 messages from my grandmother who I was really close to! The medium spoke about things she would never know relating to Oliver, I do find comfort from going but it does get a little frustrating at times because I want a message from Oliver just for him to let me know he is ok!! Try it once and if you don't like it don't go again!! There is defenatly something in it though!! I'm not saying all mediums are "real" but many are!! Xx

Hi just wanted to say thinking of Jacob born on the 28/09/11

I can't sleep or eat, the pain just seems to get worse each day. I also have the butterfly feelings but I know for me they are a syptom of anxiety

Morning girls xx

Welcome to our special thread Moomin - just sorry you had to be part of it. to hear about your little boy xx

Morning.

Welcome Moomin so sorry about Jacob xx

More problems with mil this morning. I posted on facebook a little while back that I was thankful for my family and how they've supported us etc and mil posts on it today saying "yet another dig!!", which baffled me. Then text dh to say he should forget about them he doesn't care about her etc etc. The woman is just deluded I swear. I so don't need this and neither does dh. This is exactly what she did after Scarlett died and I'm so stressed now. I've actually been getting tightenings and all I can put it down to is stress.

She's really stirring things, saying his brothers girlfriend calls her up to tell her what I say on facebook (even when she can see herself and nothing is about her anyway!!) So I've tried to nip that in the bud by texting the girlfriend and telling her that's what she said and that it can't be true as it's so absurd etc.

Mil won't even answer the phone to him, is just texting him and keeps on bringing things back to me. Apparently it's my fault and she wants him to say as much. I'm just confused as I've done nothing at all, not even spoken to the woman in weeks yet somehow I'm to blame. For what, I don't know.

Just what I need on a Monday morning.

I saw that on FB Cheese....was very weird!

Indeed, so odd, just out of seemingly nowhere as well.

As my lovely Nan used to say 'nowt as queer as folk'

cheese - i know it's not ,y place, but really, someone needs to tell her to fuck the fuck off to fucksville. And then fuck off some more.

If you want a willing volunteer, just shout.

LOL LOL 'Hell hath no fury like an angry Dee - you just made me spit my brew out!!!

Lew just said.....'When I was 7 when I used to live here before a lorry knocked me down, I banged my head on the road and had to go to live with Jesus....but then he let me come back born all over again.....Andma why are you looking at me like that?'

He does not know how Matt died....he does not know he was 7....he does not know the story properly. He just knows that Matt got knocked down...but no other details.

I asked him was he called Lewis when he was here the first time....he just tutted and said 'Noooooooo Andma, me was called Jack!!'

Spooky piggin' kid

shabbs how amazing that he said that! must be your Matt telling you something x

Bloody hell fire, Shabbs!!!

I've just read it to manshape and hes got goosepimples, so have i.

Amazing.

dee lol that did make me smile :) Oh if only that wouldn't cause WW3, very odd woman though... She thinks everything is about her, she's extremely childish.

shabs oh wow that gave me goosebumps too , that must have really shaken you! xx

Morning ladies xx

That is spooky Shabs x

It is miserable here today torrential rain, dark and gloomy. I thought I would have a bit of a clear out today. First drawer I started on had a bag of old photos. Lots of Richard and kids. I cannot bear it today. So put it all back and am wasting the morning playing scrabble. My house will never be cleared up, I can't face it.

He's upstairs now pestering Tom (bet Tom is pleased) Nursery has really changed him in just a couple of weeks DH got a bit cross with him this morning and, we thought we were out of earshot! DH said 'Will be glad when he buggers off home today . DH went out and Lew shouted him back to the front door....he shouted 'Go on Andad...bugger off home' LOL

Oh he is so funny, please thank him for making me laugh xx

Hi Lavandes - since my nephew was born very prematurely last month, I have become aware of a charity called Bliss (supporting parents of babies born too soon, too small and too sick). They sell a couple of different bears, and my mum bought the smaller one for my nephew and it is lovely. I've never done a link before, but will try here if you're interested here