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Original poster

Where are my fucking hell shoes, and other delightful phrases from my 3 year old, HEEELP!!

300 replies

gaelicsheep · 02/02/2010 23:41

What have I done? I have been known to swear out loud, in front of him, on occasion but FGS my 3 year old has a mouth like a sewer all of a sudden. I've done all the advising, telling people to ignore, don't rise to it etc. etc. But what if he blurts this out in Tesco, or god forbid at nursery?!

I have to get to bed so I'll leave you lovely ladies to ponder this one and will bump tomorrow if necessary. But someone please reply and tell me he'll forget these words if I ignore him. Please!

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MarineIguana · 03/02/2010 16:36

But "Mummy that dog meat smells like fanny" isn't actually swearing, it's just shocking as a sentence. Fanny isn't a swear word surely!

DS went through a stage of saying " 'sake!" under his breath when about 4. Wasn't swearing either, technically speaking, but sounded terribly rude.

MarineIguana · 03/02/2010 16:37

Although he could have got that from us saying "For goodness' sake!"

He didn't though

2old4thislark · 03/02/2010 17:06

I can't believe that some people think it's ok and only words ! Age 2 my DD said 'silly cow' and I was mortifed. Did think it was funny for a second but very quickly realised we needed to 'edit' in front of her. I do swear a bit but think it's best saved for special occasions and then people know you're really angry! I think it's never acceptable to swear in public or to any staff anywhere!

For the people who think it's only words........what would you think if your child's teacher swore? It may be funny if one child at school/nursery swears but if every child was swearing, would it be funny then? I think not!

It's never to early to teach children that swear words are naughty words that we shouldn't really say!

Alicetheinvisible · 03/02/2010 17:14

I think there is a big difference swearing in front of your kids and swearing at your kids.

I am careful about what i say in front of DD but admit i do sometimes let rude words slip out (especially when driving) but i can't imagine how anyone could possibly swear at their children. I have heard someone shout at their toddler (who was crying) in the street "Shut the fuck up, or i will smack your fucking face in" never excusable

MarineIguana · 03/02/2010 17:18

Totally agree Alice - any swearing DS has heard from us is just us getting annoyed with ourselves or general situations - not at him. That would be completely different and I'd feel dreadful if I did that.

ChocFudgeCake · 03/02/2010 17:20

I don't see what's wrong with what Goblinchild said.

aokay · 03/02/2010 17:20

my beautiful, blonde daughter approached some smiling old ladies on a bench and said "Mummy can I s*it here? - she did have a speech impediment and was only 2 but the looks we got!.......
oh, and youngest daughter recently demander her "bloody milk" from her church going granny the other day - I have never described it so and can imagine she's playing with linguistics (unless she's quoting granny obviously!)

SweetGrapes · 03/02/2010 17:33

Ds learnt shit at about 2 years old. It was one of his first few words. I tried to change it to something else so now when he is busy concentrating on something and it doesn't go right, he says 'soup' under his breath.

Turniphead1 · 03/02/2010 17:39

DD1 (aged 2 at the time) sighing "for f*cks sake" very loudly but in a very familar fashion at Church was a particular highlight in our house. Can't think where she picked that up

MudandRoses · 03/02/2010 18:06

DS used to say 'fuck's sake' (yes, guilty) but we managed to divert him by saying "foxes? Where?" Worked for a year or so! Now he knows there are words which are unacceptable (even if mum and dad occasionally say them) and lead to punishment - I know it's not fair, but life's not fair! Things are different for kids and grown-ups, and there are some words which grown-ups oughtn't say, and kids musn't say.

Skimty · 03/02/2010 18:16

I agree with goblin child.

I can just imagine the uproar if a teacher swore in front of a group of children. I think it's about setting an example.

In the case of the OP I would probably (with my 3 year old) explain words are wrong and we could both try together to stop, even with a mummy and ds sticker chart? So the attention goes on not saying the words...

carocaro · 03/02/2010 18:45

DS2 who is 3 just said in the car 'traffic fuckin shit' DS1 7 throught this was the funniest thing.

We had been in the car for over 2 hours and I had said this when he was asleep and DS1 was engrossed in his DS.

The power of the sub-concious mind!

moonbells · 03/02/2010 18:46

I've got a good one. ds is not swearing, but what he says sounds like he is!

"What sound does a duck make?"

"Fack!"

(and giggle)

independiente · 03/02/2010 18:47

I'm another one who doesn't understand why it's apparently so hard not to swear in front of your children.
Going by many of these posts, I must be nothing short of a genius or paragon of self-control (though I've never ever thought of myself as either before now).
I swear in front of: my husband, friends, close relations in my own generation. I don't swear in front of: my children, other children, my parents, older people, those in a professional environment, and people I don't know very well.
If you don't mind your children swearing, that's your call -swear away and don't pretend to 'worry' about it on an internet forum. Ridiculous.

Paolosgirl · 03/02/2010 18:59

Well said, Inde

nickytwotimes · 03/02/2010 19:03

Oh, ffs inde, get of your high horse.

Has a swear word never escaped when you have dropped something on your foot? Seriously?

I do my very best to not swear in front of my wee boy, but I have very occassionally said 'shit!' when I have hurt myself or fallen over.

MoreCrackThanHarlem · 03/02/2010 19:04

indepediente that's exactly the point I was trying to make when I asked if those that admit to swearing in front of their children do the same in front of other people's children.

I am, apparently, a troll, and lonely on my 'pedestal of perfection' because I manage to control my language around my children.
Those that contend that children should be aware of when it is appropriate to swear are clearly asking too much of their children since they can't manage it themselves.

Bessie123 · 03/02/2010 19:06

Where are my fucking hell shoes? That is hilarious, I shall be saying that (not in front of my dd) regularly from now on.

MrsGuyofGisbourne · 03/02/2010 19:08

Lighten up! OP - very funny - its not like they have heard you swearing AT them , which I agree would be terrible - but they know their parent are human, get frustrated sometmes, say rude things but then calm down.

I was mortified when I picked up DS2 from art club one day - he was about 6, and the teacher a kindly gentle woman said she had to have a word with me as there had been an incident when the water had been knocked over, and DS2 said 'Who spilt the fucking water?'. . I quickly explained that we had been listening in the car to james Blunt cd and he must have picked it up from 'You're Beautiful' Later explained to DS2 that it as a situational thing - we would not be unduly upset if he said that at home in a monent of frustration - he is free at home to express whatever he thinks - but he had to modify his behaviour to relate to the context he was in. And since then he has - perfectly !

mehdismummy · 03/02/2010 19:11

ds just said that bloody plaster has fallen off again!

gorionine · 03/02/2010 19:12

I really do not like swearing myself or hearing people swear but even I have to admit I was in fits of laughter after reading Soupdragon's first post!

TulipsInTheRain · 03/02/2010 19:16

ds1 told me to 'Open the bloody stairgate mommy' last week and dd referred to her homework yesterday by asking me 'Where is that bloody stupid book?'

they're 3 and 5 respectively

although tbh, i'm kind of impressed that that was practically a first for each of them (not counting dd's 'fucks sake' phase when she was 2) considering how bad dp and i are for forgetting the kids are in the room and swearing!

GaGaOohLaLa · 03/02/2010 19:27

Nickytwotimes - funnily enough, no, I don't swear when I drop something on my foot. Partly because I don't find foul language appealing in other people (and, therefore, I wouldn't want to be a sewer-mouth myself), and partly because I don't want the DCs to copy foul language.

I don't see what's wrong with Goblinchild's views. So flame me.

I wonder if you will all find it so funny when your cute toddler are 16-y-old heavers and are telling you to f* off?

DS (nearly eight) has started to learn swear words at school. I have told him that he is not to use them in front of other people, and particularly not in front of younger siblings. If he does, he will be in Big Trouble (and he knows it).

DH would be a sewer-mouth left to his own devices. However, even he manages not to do it in front of the DCs (he saves it up for later).

MudandRoses · 03/02/2010 19:35

Is being told by your 16 yr old to fuck off really so much worse than them saying "I hate you" or "you make me sick?"
You don;t have to be swearing to hurt people.

And secondly, aren't kids who've been taught that swearing is totally taboo (and mummy NEVER does it) more likely to BECOME the 16 yr old who tells mummy to fuck off? All teenagers rebel, in whatever way is likley to be most shocking.

Bicnod · 03/02/2010 19:40

My best mate phoned me up earlier to berate me for buying her a mug years ago with 'Queen of fucking everything' printed on it. Her 5 year old DD has now learnt to read and read the naughty word out to her today