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Original poster

Sick of my greedy daughter

243 replies

Orangeanddemons · 29/12/2013 18:56

Dd is 7. She has always been greedy, but she is just intolerable now. We don't have any crap or junk in the house, as she was unmanageable around it.

She has eaten a large roast dinner 2 hours ago followed by yoghurt. She is now mithering and screaming that she is hungry. We try to ignore, but eventually you have to take a stand. She is like this every single day. Obsessed with food, nagging for food all the time.

I have had endless conversations about mouth versus tummy hunger, but it makes no difference. Nothing does. She just wants to eat all the time. I have tried to bring her up with a healthy attitude to food, but she is just obsessed with eating, so I have to restrict her.

We have 3 ds's too. None of them are like this. I am at my wits end

OP posts:
claraschu · 29/12/2013 19:31

My daughter would have eaten more than that at her age. That is not very much really. I would offer lots of healthy snacks like raw vegetables with humous, popcorn with a little salt, different fruits. Also, offer things that are fun and a bit time consuming, (so since she likes nuts, buy them in their shells and get her a nut cracker).

With meals, I would serve big portions of vegetables and salads, also lots of vegetable soups with a small bit of bread. If your daughter loves food, you can experiment with big piles of healthy, fun to eat, vegetables, and instead of just a yoghurt (quick to eat and not very bulky, often with added sugar), offer plain yoghurt with lots of pieces of fruit to dip into it.

I think you could come up with more fun, healthy ways to enjoy eating, and you could give her more food that takes longer to eat and is a bit bulky without being fatty.

SavoyCabbage · 29/12/2013 19:32

I would tell her she can have porridge whenever she is hungry. With no deviation.

I remember reading that the more choices there are, the more you eat. So if you buy a box of biscuits with 10 types in, you will get through them far quicker than an equal amount of biscuits of the same type.

Dollydishus · 29/12/2013 19:33

Normal day for my DS2.
Breakfast...2 small pancakes, juice, a piece of fruit and some cucumber slices. Possibly a sausage too. Fruit snack mid morning and glass of milk. Lunch...cooked school dinner and pudding, glass of milk. After school...toast, milk, possibly teacake or flapjack, fruit. Dinner...cooked meal, plus yoghurt or fruit. Bedtime...milk, bread and butter and an apple.

On 25th centile for both height and weight. On the go constantly.

JakeBullet · 29/12/2013 19:35

it sounds like she has issues around food. Tbh your description of her as "greedy" sounds very vritical and makes me wonder if these battles over the amount she eats has given her a bit of an issue. Not a criticism of you as it is hard but I do wonder if she has picked up on your feelings about this,

Her intake sounds good and I wonder what she is substituting food for. Also agree about ensuring fluid intake is good,

Tinkertaylor1 · 29/12/2013 19:36

I don't think it's a lot either op.

toast AND cereal .... I had thar before I got out of bed on holiday , then went own stairs for full English Grin I'm not over weight!

My dd is a gannet always have been. She could climb through the letter box!

Your dd might be having growth spurt or fast metabolism . Just have healthy snacks available so she dosnt start to go for sugary carby stuff

Artandco · 29/12/2013 19:38

It doesn't seem too much if she isn't overweight. It's mainly empty carbs though -toast, shreddies for breakfast would leave most people hungry and hour after . You need to add more protein

In comparison today my slim, prob underweight 4 year old has eaten:

Breakfast : glass of milk, 2 scrambled eggs with mushrooms.

Lunch: roast beef, new pototoes, leeks and green beans

Snack: tangerine, kiwi and walnuts chopped up

Dinner: smoked haddock and creamed spinach

He will prob have a Xmas choc of some sort before bed and another glass of milk

stickysausages · 29/12/2013 19:38

And by making it such an issue, you're storing up issues for her future :(

TidyDancer · 29/12/2013 19:39

Not to scare the OP, but I can't believe some of you think that's not a big amount of food! It's not bad food, these just lots of it! I'm a 30-year-old woman and I don't eat that much.

I would say the "so hungry she's screaming for more food" is the bit I'd be most concerned about though.

TippiShagpile · 29/12/2013 19:39

Ds2 (8) has had 1 piece of toast with marmite.

Half a chicken roll. Houmous with carrots.

Steak (small) and cucumber and tomatoes and sweetcorn and sweet potato chips.

And that's a good day.

Hmm
TidyDancer · 29/12/2013 19:40

stickysausages is absolutely right though, you need to not make an issue out of this as much as possible. I would consult with a GP though, just in case there is an underlying issue.

Mellowandfruitful · 29/12/2013 19:42

I assume when you say 'a large roast dinner' the OP means large for a 7 yo, not large in the way you would expect for an adult.

My DS's food intake varies enormously - he has phases of eating like a sparrow and then devouring everything in sight. But as he is slim I tend to assume he is regulating his own intake effectively. As other posters have said, to make any headway on this it would be helpful to know a) whether your DD is overweight and b) whether she drinks enough.

Gileswithachainsaw · 29/12/2013 19:46

I'd take her to the drs tbh. There may be an underlying condition that's making her do hungry all the time. There's no way my dd would eat all that food. She's never finish a whole jacket potato and eat tea on top.

FishfingersAreOK · 29/12/2013 19:46

It sounds OK to me too - though it depends on the portion size. And depends on if she is overweight.

Is it possible her diet is actually too low in fat. Children need fat as part of their diet to give them enough calories. If the yoghurts/butter etc are all low-fat she may actually be hungry.

DH and I went on a low fat diet when the DCs were 3/5yo. I mentioned to a HCP that they seemed to be hungry all the time (ie not just a 2-3 week growth spurt) and HCP asked the same thing of me - are we eating low-fat - and do DCs do the same - if so the DCs actually need more fat. So full fat custard, a few stodgier puddings (crumbles, that sort of thing) were actually "good" for them. So started re-introducing the full fat to their diet and sure enough they calmed down.

If you are worried about her weight/BMI though I would say, like PP, a trip to the GP would be in order.

AwfulMaureen · 29/12/2013 19:49

It's not a massive amount that she has eaten.....my 9 year old DD is the same and I just give her an apple or a carrot!

MostWicked · 29/12/2013 19:49

Sick of her? Intolerable? It sounds like you are taking her large appetite as a personal insult.
Find some foods that you are happy for her to snack on and stop turning this into a battle.

24again · 29/12/2013 19:51

That is a normal amount of food. is she overweight? It sounds more like you are the one with food issues?

MaddAddam · 29/12/2013 19:51

It doesn't sound that much to me for an active growing child, my 9yo dd is very skinny (well under the 25th centile, can still wear clothes for 5 year olds width-wise) and eats more than that - we call her 6 dinner Sid, she often has 3 portions of porridge/cereal/toast for breakfast, and 2 or 3 meals in the evening (she visits local friends and relatives, eats there, comes home and eats more). Then she'll snack before bed. She tends to like low calorie foods and she is active, she must burn it all off.

curlew · 29/12/2013 19:51

Why can't she have something to eat if she's hungry?

NigellasDealer · 29/12/2013 19:53

if OP will not come back and tell us if her daughter is overweight or how active she is then it is not much good.
although along with other posters I did notice that OP doesn't seem to like her daughter v much...'sick of her' 'greedy' 'mithering' 'screaming' 'intolerable'

Gileswithachainsaw · 29/12/2013 19:54

For those saying it's a normal amount of food. Do you also feel asking for food all day on top is also normal?

That's the most worrying part. That after a roast which let's face it is carb protein and fat heavy and a yogurt, screaming with hunger is normal?

Winterbluessummersoonish · 29/12/2013 19:54

My toddler 2 eats what feels like constantly and he has consumed a similar list to your list today. We have started to say no in between meals and offer a drink as children (and adults) mistake hunger for thirst. As well as offering drinks we have also added structure such as breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, tea, then a supper of cereal offered before bed. Then when we say no it's more inline with no it's only 20 mins till it's snack time or you just had lunch you can have a snack soon. We have seen this make a difference.

Our oldest who is 4 does not eat as much at one sitting but also gets very hungry- we took him to the GP who encouraged us to give him low GI foods such as bananas, wholemeal bread, digestives etc as snacks to maintain sugar levels. He is having bloods done as he gets so hungry he becomes evil if he has not eaten every two hours.

Under active thyroid, diabetes are worth looking into if it is genuine hunger. It may be, if you take the school of thought all behaviour is communication something she is trying to communicate - boredom, attention etc? And as my GP told me it may be genuine hunger and your child's metabolism.

I read a great book about feeding children, which I can go and find the title if you are interested and it gives good tips about offering food family style - as in, serve it in the middle of the table and let all children/adults take the amount they want. Also always offer bread for children to fill up on.

Last thing that I was told or read is that you should monitor children's intake over a week not 24 hours as they self regulate over a longer time then adults do.

What is her weight like? Does she like food/cooking interacting with it? Or is she just eating to fill up?

ljny · 29/12/2013 19:55

What *MostWicked" said makes sense.

It's her body. Metabolisms differ. Offer her some fruit. And a drink. Or boring toast.

Let her learn to recognise when she's hungry and when she's full. Provided she's not stuffing herself with junk food - which you wisely removed - then she shouldn't need to scream for food if she's hungry. She doesn't sound greedy to me.

koTinkaBell · 29/12/2013 19:56

could it be boredom or attention seeking. I think that list is quite a lot of food and quite carb heavy.

NigellasDealer · 29/12/2013 19:56

screaming with hunger is normal?
i doubt she is actually 'screaming' tbh

Liara · 29/12/2013 19:56

Doesn't sound like an insane amount.

My 7yo today has had:

Yoghurt with pear
Orange
Bread with egg and ham
Chocolate truffle
Tangerine
Banana cake (big slice)
Large bowl of pasta with fish and tomato sauce
Piece of quince paste

He has a cold and so not much of an appetite at the moment. He is incredibly skinny and his BMI is at the low end for his age.