Terrible Twos!!! Feel like calling in Supper Nanny????!!

[Reece]

Ds (2.8) has been difficult since DS2 came along 16 months ago but in the last month his tantrums,tears and stubborness have esculated big time.

Typical morning before 9am - Jumps out cot (refuses to sleep in bed)refuses to use potty, refuses to take off pull-up and PJ's. When downstairs asks for weetabix, serve him with warm milk as asked and then refuses to eat it saying that he wants Special K instead. I say no because he had asked for Weetabix. He then proceeds to throw entire bowl of Weetabix on the floor and rant about Special K. I don't give in and try hard to ignore his tantrum. Still won't use potty, demands TV, I refuse until he uses potty and helps to get dressed and washed etc. He continues to rant and rave for 20 + mins. At this stage we are running late for playschool and DS2 is not washed and dressed etc etc.

I expect there are many of you out there that think this is just intermediate stuff but I just need some guidance on how to deal with it.. I feel myself raging inside but know that will make things worse. He is pushing and pushing me and I know I will burst at some stage.

Last night he refused to stay in his room, kept jumping out of the cot for about 2 hours screaming. He was running all over the house upstairs going through my room etc. I tried the quietly placing him back in bed again and again method (don't know what it's called) but he kept waking DS2. DH and I ended up giving up and going downstairs to leave him to it. i feel like locking him in his room.

How long does the terrible 2's last for? Do they have terrible 3's as well??? Parenting is extremely tiring and frustrating at the moment. I am not enjoying him and can't see any light at the end of the tunnel. Help!!

DS went to bed after his bath and story and we have never heard a word from him.
He also said that he wouldn't hit his baby brother again and said sorry ' for downstairs' as this is where is crimes are committed!! It will be interesting to see tomorrow if he remembers what he said.

Thanks reece! I feel a bit better, I think I have pre-holiday nerves.

I should be looking forward to our holidays, but it is always stressful, just getting everything ready for 5 people! we arn't taking the caravan cause we can't afford it so we are staying with in-laws, but that is very stressful, without going through the whole story - they are a high maintenance family, mixed with our disfunctional family, you feel you are walking on eggshells! (not really a holiday, but what do you do)!

I went to my karate class tonight, I could have punched the instructors lights out, he was being really tough, but I got through it, came home and it was lovely to see the twins. Just 1 hour break is all I need and it worked, but I still feel really knotted up and stressed, very tearful and out of control.

But hey ho, get a grip, keep taking the tablets sooz! everything will be ok!

When is your holiday sleepysooz?
I always get really stressed with all the packing and everything. It will be worth it though.
Sorry to hear you have to walk on eggshells. A holiday to me is not necessarily where you are but being around the people you love and feel comfortable with so you can relax. Hope you get some of that. Hope your kids enjoy it and are on their best behaviour. They can save their tantrums for the in-laws

Hey everyone. Having a good morning?
Ds was in our room at 1am wide awake and wanted a wee. I took him to the potty and all was fine but then he kept coming back in until 2am! Yes, I am tired now.
He was back in our room again at 7am sharp! I thought he would have been so tired he would have slept til about 9 but no such luck.
He was raring to go at 7 and really hyper. Don't know what thats all about. At least I know it wasn't anything I was feeding him! If he is going to be a morning person he sure hasn't inherited it from me

I've been following that thread closely too. I so don't want MN to be closed down. What a depressing thought
It is so great to have MN to turn to. I sometimes don't know what I'd do without it and Iv'e only been a user for 2 months.
2 things I can't bear- Greed and selfishness.

Sorry to hear DD was up twice in the night. Our kids must be telepathically sending each other messages to wake us up!
Glad you enjoyed your shopping trip.

DS has had 'one push DS2' episode so far this morning.

Oh FOM I feel so angry with what is going on.
You hit the nail on the head as to what MN can do for us all. I only wish I had known about MN long before now. It would have made many struggles a lot easier. So happy to have it now.

I live away from home as moved to be with who is now DH I didn't really suffer any lonely feeling etc until I had kids. Weird I know,
having a loving husband and some great friends but being away from mum and family is hard. MN is an extended family in a way. Great to know that just a few clicks away you can get some sound advice and have a natter to.

Hia, I'll probably join you all tomorrow night, as I have a 101 things to do, have to tidy the house throughout before I go away as we have a house rabbit called fifi (yes fifi and the flowertots) although we have just discovered after 10 months that she is a he, has lots of extra bits and bobs!

So I have to tidy up, because I will have a stream of people coming to the house just to look after the rabbit! something seems odd though.... hmmmm.. I know what it is! these people are quite happy to look after the rabbit, but not my kids, does that tell me something, little do they know the rabbit will be chasing them round the house, trying to hump their legs! hehehehe

So I'll post you tomorrow night, I go to work 2 evenings a week til 10pm tonights one of them, so stay sane and keep the good work up in the potty department (mini reece and mini fotm) well done! apart from middle of the night visits!

Hello everyone. I have never done this chat-thing before so bear with me. My son will be three in October. He's our only child so obviously quite indulged. But over the past few weeks he's been driving us mad with his moody, unreasonable behaviour (tears and tantrums) and he's even more jealous over me than usual - won't even let me and hubby have a conversation without doing something like tipping his food on the table or throwing it across the room, or trashing his bedroom. Now he's decided he can't go to sleep without one of us being there - usually me - so we don't even get our evenings in peace! I have read some of your previous posts and I can see that a lot of you have similar experiences. It's just such a shock. Where has my baby gone? I don't know what to do to discipline him as I don't want to curb his developing personality - I'm not one for naughty steps or time outs, so right now it is a battle of wills - and he's winning.

Hi mummyluvsyoo.
Not great on giving advice tbh as I am having my own struggles with DS's tantrums etc as well. All I have learnt is try not to give in and stay as calm as you can. If you let them win once they will keep coming back for more and wear you down. Of course its so much easier said than done.
Just stick with us when things get tough and we can at least let off our steam to each other

DS has left a huge bump on DS2's head. He threw a large toy at him.
I ignored DS1 this time and cudled DS2 instead. I'm hoping DS1 will learn that he won't get my attention by bullying DS2. It is soooo upsetting as DS2 is having such a hard time. It's times like these that you need MN to keep you on the right track and not lose it.

Thanks for that Reece.

I just spent some time reading the messages on this thread. I wish I'd come to Mumsnet before - particularly at the point where you feel like your head is exploding 'cos of being stressed out. My little darling is in nursery today - which is good because yesterday was the day from hell!
I hope your day gets better.

Thanks mummyluvsyoo.
Ds took a nap in the car this afternoon for half an hour that that helped but he was still getting out of control later on around tea time.

Attacked DS2 a few more times. I was having to keep them both in my sight which is not the most practical way when you have a lot to do.

Dinner was thrown upside down on the table and he jumped out of cot once at bedtime. umm....

HELP!

DS twin1 is driving me crazy this morning, I definitely think the kiddies telepathically link up when us mums are on mumsnet! (lets play up more)

DS so far this morning has threw his breakfast across the room because he asked for 1 thing then changed his mind and I wouldn't get him what he wanted! then he threw a wobbly because I was hanging washing outside, made himself sick screaming, then I went for a shower got dressed and he's still going (tantrum) so I am now here cause I will go mad if I have to panda to his screams anylonger! (he must have got out of his bed the wrong way)

DD twin2 is as good as gold, had shower with me, had her breakfast lovely, played with toys whilst I hung washing out, generaly a beautiful dd that she is,

DS still screaming, I just want to shout 'shut up' but no I will not lower myself (liar) its impossible.

Have to go, now sounds like world war 3 has broken out in lounge, speak to you all soon!

Oh No sleepysooz how its going now?
Only just read your post. Souns like you havwe been having a tough start to the day.
My DS does that thing over the cereal although not very often any more. I refused to give him another type once he had chosen his 1st. he soon realised I meant business.

Shocked that kids can make themselves sick with a tantrum. Mine have never done that but theres plenty of time yet.

Thank goodness your DD has been an angel. Have they swapped moods yet???!

DS1 has been jumping on top of DS2 quite a bit toay. DS2 hates it as he is obviously smaller and is getting squashed. The poor thing gets really upset. DS2 is doing it to get my attention but its still so hard to ignore it.
The last time he did it (about 30 mins ago) DS2's head landed about 2" away from the edge of our kitchen floor. It's solid marble and in the doorway the edge is like a little step. I am cringeing at what could have happened.

I tried to explain to DS1 how dangerous it is to do what he is doing but there's no resoning with him yet. Too young. Just hoping something sinks in.

At this moment in time the twins have found a boppit game of my eldest son, they are in tucks of laughter, its fantastic! plus I have been on some more threads, and you always here of someone suffering more than yourself so, at THIS moment today we are all BRILLIANT (gosh I can't believe I just said that)

Your kiddies wrestling or eldest jumping on younger one seems hard to disipline! like you say they are so young, but 2 yo's do understand 'no' , but its like everything else 'easier said than done'

Ooops I think I spoke too soon, ds just bopped dd on head with boppit game! now we have a scrap! I'll have to fly, break them up, time for a walk in the fresh air me thinks!

Speak to you later

p.s ooooh thats a turn up for the books, my dd thats so inocent and beautifully well behaved has just retaliated and hit ds on head aswell (was very gently though, although thats a start for sticking up for herself) not the sort of behaviour I want though - tara for now

wrong spelling of here, should be hear

DS2 asleep in cot. DS1 in cot trying to nap

Hello everyone - isn't it great when you have a good day for a change. My little boy has been angelic today. Took him to the library, then read him some books in the garden, played snap, watched TV - not a single tantrum, all while potty training him too. Enjoying it while I can. Sorry to be ignorant but can I just check what DS1 and DS2 and DD etc mean? I'm a chat room virgin. Sleepsooz, I hope things have settled down in your household today! God, don't you just hate the food-throwing thing?

above the threads (posts) is a section 'acronyms' 'threads you're watching' etc press 'acronyms'

DD Darling daughter
DS Darling son
if number after it I presume its 1st or 2nd child

Any help?

I am new to this aswell (1 week) but you'll soon crack the codes, just!

I reckon I'm still classed as a 'newbie' as well girls so don't worry about not knowing all the codes etc yet. Just enjoy.
I have only been on MN for 2 months and it has been fantastic.

Oh btw - DS1 went to bed for 2 hours!!!! DS 2 was in bed for 3 hours!!!! Both at the same time!!!!!
That rarely happens but DS1 is in great form. There has been no bullying this afternoon, no food throwing, no accidents (apart from poo in pants which is normal).
He also ate Cottage pie (with carrot+peas in it) for the first time ever, asked me if I had made it and when I said yes he told me it was lovely!!! He then ate half a banabas mashed with some cream. HE NEVER EATS FRUIT!!!
Shocker - did the aliens take my son and replace him with a angelic clone?
We have been having a disco for the last hour. Thats me and the boys and now we have dragged DH into it. DS's have loved it. Great for using up that energy as I