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Original poster

Please help me to make a decision for my son's name

139 replies

ByLovingRoseSloth · 25/03/2024 14:22

I named my son Oscar, but I regretted shortly after learning the people's opinions of this name online as some people associate it with Oscar Mayer Wieners, Oscar the Grouch, the fish breed and the award, I am in UK and my son is 4 months old now, will my son be teased at school on any of this associations? I am very worried about this, if I change his name before he turns 1, does he need to declare his original name in future? Any problems for him to use the amended birth certificate? I am so depressed. Do you think do a name change is the best solution? If So, any name you could recommend? I am afraid I would make another mistake, please help:

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Original poster
ByLovingRoseSloth · 27/03/2024 01:30

Bluepandasp · 26/03/2024 16:47

I’ve just looked on Reddit out of interest. Those with ‘negative’ associations eg ‘the grouch’ (I wouldn’t even say that’s negative though) all seem to be based in the US. That will be because it’s not very common in the US, so when they hear the name that might be the first thing that comes to mind. To use pp’s example, it’s a bit like if someone in the uk named their child Chandler, all we think is friends. Whereas Joey, you wouldn’t think that because most people probably know a Joseph.
In the UK though Oscar is super common and I can guarantee that almost everyone will know someone by the name of Oscar. So when they hear the name, thats what they will think of. E.g my first thought when I hear Oscar is the nice boy in my dc’s class. Having a more common name stops negative associations in a good way!

Thanks, a lot of people here have also said it is a solid human name in UK, this makes me feel relieved.

OP posts:
mathanxiety · 27/03/2024 01:42

ByLovingRoseSloth · 25/03/2024 14:29

How about the fish breed, will he be teased about this?

I'd like to gently suggest that you may have a case of PND.

You have an abnormal anxiety over the perfectly lovely name you chose for your baby.

mathanxiety · 27/03/2024 01:44

ByLovingRoseSloth · 25/03/2024 15:02

I learnt those associations in Reddit, maybe Sesame Street is still popular in the US, but no longer popular in the UK, it is my problem that I think too much.

So you went to Reddit to look up associations of the name?

Please go to your doctor to have a chat. You can also contact the midwives who saw you during pregnancy/ delivery.

mathanxiety · 27/03/2024 01:49

ByLovingRoseSloth · 25/03/2024 18:23

Love to hear this, you mean I got nothing to do😂so I think about these? honestly do you think these are unnecessary to think about? I have been in a bad mood for 3 months. I will be working from home from next week, hope this will distract myself from these thoughts...

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Bad mood for three months?
You have been having thoughts like this for a while and clearly have had trouble dismissing them, or you wouldn't have posted here. You've even gone on Reddit and worry that people would know there's a fish called an oscar.

Please talk to an hcp - you have nothing to lose by having the possibulity of PND investigated, and everything to gain.

mathanxiety · 27/03/2024 01:51

ByLovingRoseSloth · 26/03/2024 10:41

I only like old fashioned names, I am worried that if I find another name I like but it is outdated or my son will not love it, or that name have some negative associations which I don't know, or many people don't like it, so I am afraid I will make another mistake, I wished that I have another name which I am confident to change to, all boy names have more or less negative comments, I think all mums will feel heartbreaking to know those negative comments, but it is the best name they think they can give to their sons. People are crucial when typing comments online.

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This kind of rumination is a sign you need to reach out for help.

Please talk to your HV or your midwives or your GP.

Original poster
ByLovingRoseSloth · 27/03/2024 13:38

mathanxiety · 27/03/2024 01:42

I'd like to gently suggest that you may have a case of PND.

You have an abnormal anxiety over the perfectly lovely name you chose for your baby.

Show quote history

I probably have PND, but after reading all of your opinions, I think these make sense, so I feel I don't need medications. I don't get depressed easily.

OP posts:
TheOriginalEmu · 27/03/2024 14:31

i know plenty of Oscars, none are teased because of their name. So please don’t worry x

mathanxiety · 27/03/2024 15:10

@ByLovingRoseSloth
Do you have any fears about medication?

PND is an illness like any other illness - and can be treated like any other illness.

QuaintPearlCritic · 27/03/2024 16:32

Oscar is a good, solid, run-of-the-mill name. Don't be swayed by associations; every single name comes with some baggage. People will always have differing opinions on names, so you can either cave to the pressure or stand firm in your choice.

If you suspect PND is influencing your feelings about your baby's name, it's crucial to address the PND first. Otherwise, you may find fault with the name no matter how many times you change it. Prioritise taking care of your mental health.

Original poster
ByLovingRoseSloth · 27/03/2024 20:09

mathanxiety · 27/03/2024 15:10

@ByLovingRoseSloth
Do you have any fears about medication?

PND is an illness like any other illness - and can be treated like any other illness.

I don't fear, but just don't think the medications are necessary. I will try to speak to HV and see what she will do

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Original poster
ByLovingRoseSloth · 27/03/2024 20:14

TheOriginalEmu · 27/03/2024 14:31

i know plenty of Oscars, none are teased because of their name. So please don’t worry x

Thank you for the reassurance, I think I can have a good night's sleep.

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Original poster
ByLovingRoseSloth · 27/03/2024 20:20

ByLovingRoseSloth · 27/03/2024 20:09

I don't fear, but just don't think the medications are necessary. I will try to speak to HV and see what she will do

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I don't have any fear about medications.

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Original poster
ByLovingRoseSloth · 27/03/2024 20:24

mathanxiety · 27/03/2024 01:49

Bad mood for three months?
You have been having thoughts like this for a while and clearly have had trouble dismissing them, or you wouldn't have posted here. You've even gone on Reddit and worry that people would know there's a fish called an oscar.

Please talk to an hcp - you have nothing to lose by having the possibulity of PND investigated, and everything to gain.

Show quote history

Thank you, I will speak to the health visitor.

OP posts:
Oranesandlemons · 19/08/2024 08:26

Other than the Oscars I’ve never even heard of any of the other Oscar references you’ve
mentioned! I love the name and would have happily named by DS Oscar. It’s a popular boy’s name and so I think you’re very unlikely to get any of these references or for him to be teased. It’s a lovely name x

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