Godmother stole my son's name

[MagsMaggie]

My baby son's Godmother recently had a baby boy and called her son the EXACT same name as my son, her Godson. She did not even ask us before stealing his name. I know that my son does not "own a name" however we did not use another name as she asked us not to. The name we gave our son is unusual. She had not heard of the name until we named our son. What type of Godmother names her newborn son after her baby godson? Our sons are so close in age. She even used the exact same spelling. My partner and I are angry. Are we being unreasonable? I feel like she has ended her relationship with us by doing this

Or even better (worse?), "Freddy" and "Freddy two". Since yours is the original and genuine article, and hers is just a copy 😁.

Wouldn't bother me except for the part where she asked you not to use a different name. If she did this because she was planning on using that name, it's very shitty and hypocritical of her.

You’re being ridiculous. She didn’t steal anything. It’s a name. Presumably to be a godparent she’s a pretty close friend. To be this angry and want to cut her off over this is unhinged.

What does a godparent actually do? Take them if the parents die?

Where does this idea come from?!

I'd usually say you cannot steal a name.

But I'd be pissed off at the fact she asked you not to use a particular name you wanted to use.....so you didn't. You chose another name. And then she ditched the first name and copied your name.

Ask her what the hell that was about. You didn't use that name out of consideration for her and then she didn't use it anyway.

That is why I am upset. We had a different name and she asked us not to use that boy's name in case she had a boy as she liked it, then she decided to use the name we used instead without saying anything

I would definitely raise this with her.

She asked you not to use name A because presumably she didn't want them to have the same name. So out of respect, you didn't. You chose name B.

She then chose name B. Despite supposedly not wanting them to have the same name.

I wouldn't let that go unremarked upon. I would asking her what she was playing at, thinking she had the right to veto name A, but then just do what she liked as regards name B.

She sounds nuts.

I could accept it if she had the good grace to explain herself, but to let it go unremarked upon - no, that's bonkers.

At least you won’t have to think of a reason to say no if she asks you to be a godparent!

I'd be tempted to put her to the blush by telling her that now she's picked the exact same name as your child, you're thinking of changing your DS's name back to the original name she wanted and asked you not to use.

I said myself that I do not own a name but it is a rare name that "millions" of people do not have. I have only met 2 people with this name, my son and her son. I am unhappy that she asked me not to name our son our OG choice so she could use it. We respected that and picked this rare name instead because of her. Then she decided to use our son's name instead of the name she asked us not to use as she wanted it.

That is so weird and completely selfish of her to ask you not to use a name and then pick your name after you've already registered your child. Is she jealous of you? Has she even addressed the fact that she has picked the same name? Imagine it was the other way around, how would she have acted if you had picked "her" name? You anbu, she is.

At the very least, your friend sounds severely lacking in imagination. I wouldn't raise your child's hopes too high when it comes to the obligatory godparent birthday gift.

Who asks someone not to use a name in case they want it in the future?!

I'm aware this isn't the main issue here but she was a dick before she used your son's name. You just hadn't seen it.

Personally I think it's all mad! Being asked not to use a name =mad. You agreeing. Then using a name when you have asked someone not to use 'your' name, and the you being upset.
The moral to the story is ' don't tell anyone what you are thinking.'

One of my close relatives has cancer. Get a grip and put this in perspective. It's a very very minor thing to be upset over. Be thankful that you have a healthy son.

however we did not use another name as she asked us not to.

Have you asked her what the duck she was playing at telling you not to use the name you liked and then not using it herself?!

She doesn’t sound like much of a friend.

people here saying 'you don't own a name' ABU. OP isn't saying she owns the name! She picked an unusual name probably so her son would be the only one and someone copied. There are hundreds of thousands of names, the godmother should have picked another. I would cut her off

What is the name!!?? Because if your getting precious over a name like Rory/ Hector... Ugh

That's awful. I'd ask why.

Will the children be together a lot as in same groups, nursery and school? If not I wouldn't worry.

You havent met 'the world'...

Is it 'Bear' 'Apple' 'Teapot' 'Yahweh' ?

I feel sorry for GM's son. The name feels kind of second hand and his mother is very jealous of OP. Huge double standards, GM did not want OP using the same names as her but she can use her godson's name? Unhinged is not even the word

You're going to have to tell us the name .

If the kids become friends they may love that it's something unique to them?

It's weird but is it worth ending a friendship over? That's the question I guess.

She sounds absolutely mad tbh. I'm not sure I'd be angry I'd just think she was batshit crazy and I'd start to reduce contact with her. Bit of a shame since you're clearly close enough for her to be a GM but her behaviour is very odd.