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Godmother stole my son's name

322 replies

MagsMaggie · 06/09/2023 11:16

My baby son's Godmother recently had a baby boy and called her son the EXACT same name as my son, her Godson. She did not even ask us before stealing his name. I know that my son does not "own a name" however we did not use another name as she asked us not to. The name we gave our son is unusual. She had not heard of the name until we named our son. What type of Godmother names her newborn son after her baby godson? Our sons are so close in age. She even used the exact same spelling. My partner and I are angry. Are we being unreasonable? I feel like she has ended her relationship with us by doing this

OP posts:
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LylaLee · 10/09/2023 08:50

Lalalalala555 · 10/09/2023 01:38

You've got a right to have emotions.

But also. It is a name. People have the same name. People are allowed to name their children. Yes it may be frustrating to you. But you do not own rights to a name. No one does. (i think?)

But ultimately, if this is a person, that you care about besides this issue. And that you enjoy having in your life. Then I wouldn't end a friendship over a name. Friendships are very valuable if they're are good ones.

But see my post above. This woman is NOT a good friend.

Thelonelygiraffe · 10/09/2023 08:52

Lalalalala555 · 10/09/2023 01:38

You've got a right to have emotions.

But also. It is a name. People have the same name. People are allowed to name their children. Yes it may be frustrating to you. But you do not own rights to a name. No one does. (i think?)

But ultimately, if this is a person, that you care about besides this issue. And that you enjoy having in your life. Then I wouldn't end a friendship over a name. Friendships are very valuable if they're are good ones.

Did you actually read the OP?

Do you think the OP's 'friend' has acted like a good friend? She hasn't.

LadyBird1973 · 10/09/2023 10:31

There are rules to friendship - you can't do whatever you like, no matter how weird and disrespectful and expect a friendship to survive.
Just because she is able to name her baby the same as the OPs, that doesn't mean she should have done it.

It's a bit 'single white female' to me

Harry12345 · 10/09/2023 13:16

This would creep me out, very strange imo

KnobbingtonKnobberson · 10/09/2023 13:16

If the name was Harry it would be a case of 'get a grip' but as it's a very unusual name and she herself asked you not to use a particular name that she was considering, yeah it's odd and I'd be annoyed too.

I know someone who had two girls and gave the daughters the same first and middle names as their friend's daughters. Absolute stalkersville territory.

EmmaGrundyForPM · 11/09/2023 09:02

This. Usually I'd say YABU as nobody owns a name, but if she asked you not to use a certain name, the implication is surely that she was planning to use that name.

I'd speak to her, there may be a particular reason although I think she should have talked to you given that she asked you not to use a different name.

LylaLee · 11/09/2023 10:08

Have you spoken to her, OP?

MagsMaggie · 11/09/2023 15:25

To clarify this involves 3 names a. The original name we considered 2. The first name we went with 3. Our son's middle name. As comments suggest the names are not Harry / Chris / Oliver.

I calmly spoke to GM. She admitted she never considered any of the names until we used or mentioned them. She said she would be furious if this was done to her and said my son should be known by a nickname.

As for changing my son's name, out of the question. The names we went with in the end work well with our surname. Freaky GM did us a favour.

DS is now taking applications for GM. Nutjobs need not apply lol

OP posts:
Wiii · 11/09/2023 15:29

MagsMaggie · 11/09/2023 15:25

To clarify this involves 3 names a. The original name we considered 2. The first name we went with 3. Our son's middle name. As comments suggest the names are not Harry / Chris / Oliver.

I calmly spoke to GM. She admitted she never considered any of the names until we used or mentioned them. She said she would be furious if this was done to her and said my son should be known by a nickname.

As for changing my son's name, out of the question. The names we went with in the end work well with our surname. Freaky GM did us a favour.

DS is now taking applications for GM. Nutjobs need not apply lol

What's the name?

Wiii · 11/09/2023 15:29

Sorry meant the one she asked you not to use, not your sons.

Angrycat2768 · 11/09/2023 15:33

MagsMaggie · 11/09/2023 15:25

To clarify this involves 3 names a. The original name we considered 2. The first name we went with 3. Our son's middle name. As comments suggest the names are not Harry / Chris / Oliver.

I calmly spoke to GM. She admitted she never considered any of the names until we used or mentioned them. She said she would be furious if this was done to her and said my son should be known by a nickname.

As for changing my son's name, out of the question. The names we went with in the end work well with our surname. Freaky GM did us a favour.

DS is now taking applications for GM. Nutjobs need not apply lol

She wants you to use a nickname for your child? And she said she would be annoyed if you had done the same to her but didn't consider your feelings at all? She is winding you up. I would not be using a nickname for my child on that basis. Your mutual friends will know which child came first, and what she has done. She will know they all think she's a jealous loon. Cut her off. All your friends will know why. If they don't, tell them. Everyone who will listen!

KnobbingtonKnobberson · 11/09/2023 15:40

She said she would be furious if this was done to her and said my son should be known by a nickname.

Lol

That's what happens when you befriend the Queen of Sheba.

Teentaxidriver · 11/09/2023 16:53

Good advice above on this page. She is not your friend; she probably has jealousy issues around you. She has trampled on your boundaries and abused your good faith. The suggestion your son is known by a nickname is grotesque. Honestly, jettison her now, although, if you have had a christening it will be awkward, but people will understand/ agree.

Angrycat2768 · 11/09/2023 19:50

My brother has 2 sets of godparents ( long and outing story, also to do with names!) It makes no difference. It's a family talking point and he just got more presents than me in his birthday! Doubt your son will get much from this woman being his godmother, though.

evtheria · 11/09/2023 20:28

“She said she would be furious if this was done to her and said my son should be known by a nickname.”

Genuflecting, backing out of room, "Of course, your excellency..."

BlowDryRat · 11/09/2023 21:50

What an absolute nutter. Your friends must be agog! Suggests your son should go by a nickname - what? 😂

LylaLee · 11/09/2023 22:10

This is someone genuinely a few sandwiches short of a picnic.

MrsElijahMikaelson1 · 11/09/2023 22:13

No-he won’t be known by a nickname. He will be known by the name we gave him. And I would ALWAYS call her son by the nickname she wants you to call your son; but I’m a petty passive aggressive bitch like that.

EmmaGrundyForPM · 12/09/2023 00:21

So, to get this straight

You say you're thinking of using the name Rudolph. She asks you not to as its her favourite ever name and she has been planning to use it if she ever has a son.

You agree not to use the. name Rudolph.

You then have a son whom you call Ludovic Alphonso. Your friend becomes his GM.

Friend then has a son and instead of calling him Rudolph she calls him Ludovic Alphonso.

Is that correct?

If so she is truly bonkers. You really need to block her

LylaLee · 12/09/2023 07:42

EmmaGrundyForPM · 12/09/2023 00:21

So, to get this straight

You say you're thinking of using the name Rudolph. She asks you not to as its her favourite ever name and she has been planning to use it if she ever has a son.

You agree not to use the. name Rudolph.

You then have a son whom you call Ludovic Alphonso. Your friend becomes his GM.

Friend then has a son and instead of calling him Rudolph she calls him Ludovic Alphonso.

Is that correct?

If so she is truly bonkers. You really need to block her

It's like she wants to take over OP's life. It's so creepy.

Mellowautumnmists · 12/09/2023 08:15

DS is now taking applications for GM. Nutjobs need not apply lol

Have you had the christening?

Twelve8Ts · 24/09/2023 21:04

For what it’s worth I don’t think you’re being unreasonable. This would really annoy me.
Some people aren’t bothered about names, but some people are! I think it’s really weird behaviour. I would have to say something.

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