Is this really an issue???

[Sim2]

My brother has a one year old called Eva..I have just called my daughter Eve- both girls have different middle and surnames yet my sister in law has fallen out with us!!!
Is this really an issue?!..surely it doesn't matter at all!!

I agree with tammy. Why else do we NAME people or things? We do so that they can be IDENTIFIED. That to me is the purpose of a name.

And this has nothing with 'being unique' - of course every single person is unique, regardless of what they're called! However, it becomes much easier to IDENTIFY a person if he or she has a name that is as unique as possible to him or her.

And all his "but Eve and Eva are completely different names" is practically a definition of disingenuous!

tammy haha, we actually do have some Big Dannys and Fat Tonys in our extended family! That's the exception though, mostly we use middle names.

I can understand your indignation better now that I know you're a teacher though, you probably deal with this all the time! And not like you can call a kid Fat Harry to his face

I haven't read all the responses but I would be upset if my brother named my niece almost the same as my dd, I really would. I think they will probably both end up as Evies and this will make everyone's life (in the family) more difficult than necessary. Seems a shame as there are indeed lots and lots of beautiful girls' names to choose from.

Have you already registerd her name? Would you be willing to change her name?

heh, I now have a vision of something along the lines of the Nac Mac Feegles from Terry Pratchett's discworld, with their excessive use of similar names, leading to my favourite:
No'-As-Big-As-Medium-Sized-Jock-But-Bigger-than-Wee-Jock Jock

The people exepcting OP to change her daughter's name are being way OTT and unfair on the dd.

She will have to show the documentation for the name change on every offical thing she does forever, because SIL is being a bit precious.

I guess I just don't see your first name as being what identifies you, given so many of us have the same ones. To me you're identified by your name plus surname. That's how we identify all the same-named cousins in my family. Except those that have the same name and surname, of course. That can get a bit complicated. But we get round it!

:) at Thumbwitch. I love those wee men! :)

"I guess I just don't see your first name as being what identifies you, given so many of us have the same ones. To me you're identified by your name plus surname."

But if not so many of us shared the same first name then there'd be no need to add the surname or other modifier. Moreover, I know at least 3 Steve Smiths and several John Smiths.... how do you keep those apart ?

Sim, what the hell were you thinking? I would be furious. Hope (for everyone's sake) that you have changed it.

I used to live in a street with a lot of people who shared my name.

We had Big Pip, Little Pip, Medium Pip and Very Big Pip - all living within a few houses of each other.

Your DD and her cousin will end up being Big Evie and Little Evie. They will love it.

You may end up a little sad that your DD doesn't have a special name of her very own (which if how your SIL is feeling now - unfortunately she has no choice in the matter, unlike you), or you may not care. Ultimately it is quite a small issue in the scheme of things.

I think the whole point around this is not that people can't negotiate their way around people with the same name, nor that being miffed over this is particularly rational.

Basically, it's just Bad Form.

There are more than enough people posting on this thread who'd be, at best, miffed; at worst, really pissed off.

If, as the OP states, it's just a name, then why, out of the myriad of girls names on the planet, choose one which is so similar and then be all faux-shocked when someone takes umbrage? If it's 'just a name', then choose another one. At the very least, just sound the other person out to see where they stand - they may well be fine about it (enough people on ths thread would be) and all the drama could be avoided. And when I say 'sound the other person out', I don't mean by email...

Am happy to go out on a limb and say it's not many who'd care to be known as 'very big Pip'.

Seriously - Big Pip and, err, Very Big Pip laugh along with it, but they're silently seething on the inside.

Very Big Pip was the only adult, the rest of us were under 10yo.

I'm afraid we weren't very thoughtful, or creative with names, as children .

I should add that (years later) when I started dating DH, his two best friends were already dating women called "Pip". They were already know to the group as Big Pip and Little Pip, so I became Middle Pip.

All I can say is that giving your DD a unique name, instead of a popular 1970s one, can avoid a lot of confusion.

(Perhaps I really am a NacMacFeegle)

Absolutely agree with seeker re definition of disingenuous

And yeah the novelty of "big evie" will wear off at about 10 at which point the Evie's will start to be distinguished by their physical attributes. Let's hope your Evie never becomes "Fat Evie" "lanky Evie" "You mean nice Evie? No the other one" etc etc.

I think you might be No'As-Big-As-Medium-Sized-Pip-But-Bigger-Than-Wee-Pip-Pip.

Dreamingbohemain - how do you know who the presents are for under the Christmas tree? What happens if you run into one of the cousins and you want to tell someone? "I ran into Jane today"..."Really which one?"
How does it work?

OP - I'd be really angry at you I'm afraid. All through a pregnancy you spend so much time deliberating and dreaming about your baby's name - I would feel like you had stolen a very special part of the whole expereience from me.

Maybe that's dramatic, but Mum's can be a but dramatic about their children I've noticed!

I wouldn't like this - people put a lot of thought into their name choice, it's generally important to them, so I'd be cross of my sil did this.
My favourite boys name just doesn't work with DP's surname, and he refused to even consider the girl's name I've loved for years - so I picked something else. Lots of people have names that they absolutely love but that just won't work for whatever reason - this is no different. It's disappointing, but choose another name.

She has now been registered as Eve ..
The girls won't see each other that much and won't have Xmas together as both families are mixed religion and go to the in laws each year..
The grandparents don't mind nor do other family members and nobody has called anyone Evie!
I don't appreciate people saying I don't want people disagreeing with my opinion as I have already pointed out numerous people have disagreed but in a useful friendly way...some women on here are just plain rude!

So despite the vast majority of the people whose opinion you asked saying that you were making a mistake, and despite it being really, really easy for you to avoid upsetting your brother and sil, you carried on regardless. Not much point you asking, was it?

It is only an issue if the adults involved make it an issue. It has never bothered my son and his cousin and they have exactly the same name and spent a lot of time together. My sister and I were sensible about it and didn't even think about it.