Support thread for women who are pregnant or TTC following a termination for abnormalities. Thread 7

[Kiki275]

Welcome to the newest thread of support for those ladies who are pregnant or trying to conceive after terminating for abnormalities. Since this thread first began (almost ten years ago!) there have been stories of heart break, sadness and fear, but from these stories there have also been stories of happiness, success and most importantly, hope.

@SlipperTripper so sorry to hear this. How long did your lochia last? Was there a gap between that and your period starting? My lochia lasted nearly 6 weeks after loosing my boys, so understand how frustrating it is x

@Kiki275 lochia only lasted four weeks, had a gap of a week, then period hit with a vengeance (and joyously, my first ever episode of thrush on the same bloody day)! GP stuck me back on some hefty antibiotics, but it just feels neverending. Have a blood test on Friday to check iron levels, spoke to midwives yesterday who suggested a&e if it doesn't calm down, which didn't do much to help my panic 😫

Hey guys- I just did a pregnancy test and it’s still
Positive. Do any of you remember how long it took your hcg to drop after your TFMR? Mine was at 14 weeks

@CorkViaDublin
I think 3 weeks after the procedure your supposed to get a negative xx

Thanks a mill @JustStuck I’ll test on Thursday so- that’s three weeks.
I’m trying to search online to see if it’s possible to ovulate before hcg comes down because I’m almost certain I ovulated at the weekend

@SlipperTripper I can't imagine antibiotics would help with the thrush. Whenever I've had it, it's because of antibiotics. Have they prescribed canestan or similar?
I did have a few gaps in my lochia but I can't remember any being a week long, more-like a few days. Google says it could be 6-8 weeks. I'd be tempted to try the GP prior to A&E, they could make a gynae referral but I'm glad they're checking your bloods x

@Kiki275 I think the antibiotics were because I had a manual placenta removal, so there was panic in case I had developed an infection. I had cream as well, not canesten, but similar I assume. It's cleared up, hoping it is done and dealt with.

I have my follow up obstetrician appt tomorrow, so will bring it up then, although they have said it's very much to discuss results of amniocentesis and to refer any other issues to midwives. I'm reluctant to rock up at a&e with a period, feels a bit overdramatic 🥴

@SlipperTripper that's good. Do bring it up with your obstetrician. My follow up was brilliant and they quickly acted on any lingering concerns I had. As yours is potentially a problem of any procedures done, you're well within your rights to discuss. Good luck x

@NoCallerID just catching up with things, sorry to hear your tests have faded and also that you feel fobbed off by the midwife. I agree with @Redhead43 that’s it’s good you tested early as you have therefore seen this happen 4 times so can inform them of that. I hope you manage to get on the trial and get more answers.

@CorkViaDublin my pregnancy tests were positive for about 4 weeks after TFMR from memory, certainly long enough for me to wonder whether I’d conceived again.

@SlipperTripper sorry that you find yourself here.

@Mummabear40 is it possible to ovulate while the residual hcg is present from the last pregnancy

@CorkViaDublin I don’t know tbh sorry x

I’ll ask my gp. Thanks @Mummabear40

Hi everyone, I'm mid AF again and ordered some more OPKs (100 this time), I've got a few thermometers knocking around and wondered if it's worth temping as well. Does anyone do this and is there a best time? I figured 1st thing when my alarm clock child wakes up x

@Kiki275 I temp and you have to do it first thing, before you get out of bed, have a drink etc. I find it very helpful as it confirms the day you’ve ovulated and also prepares you for AF as there is always a noticeable drop the day before. It does not predict ovulation though, but you get a temp rise after.

Thanks @Mummabear40, I'm all for stuff that can be done in bed with minimal effort 😂 x

@Kiki275 the thermometer helps but once the temp changes then ovulation has passed so it’s better to track for a few months to learn how long you tend to stay at the same temp before ovulation

Thanks @CorkViaDublin. I'm literally at the point of doing everything, just so I can't feel like we've not caught because I didn't try x, y and z and missed the window. x

I’m in exactly the same place @Kiki275 xx

@Kiki275 I would highly recommend the book taking charge of your fertility by Toni Weschler. I temp too, although with a toddler who doesn't sleep through I find it very challenging, but it's accurate enough to confirm ovulation. Wouldn't use it for avoiding pregnancy at the moment but have done prior to having my son. I have learned a lot about my body.

I've started bleeding yesterday, 3 days after stopping the progesterone.
I've also heard back from the research scientists regarding the trial - I'd have to have one normal cycle before starting the trial so that's another one to add onto the list of not ttc. I've called my screening midwife basically in tears yesterday and she was so sweet and said to try get an urgent referral to the gynaecology consultant who looked after me when I had the TFMR through my gp. I should hear back from the GP today but I doubt that she'll do the referral asking specifically for the biopsy to check for chronic Endometritis. Also enquired to go the private route..... I know I must sound like I've been self diagnosing and am being a "I know it all and I know best" but from the 2nd CP onwards I said I just know that something isn't right with my lining. It's frustrating I can't get the test I want and it's dragging out so much. I appreciate the NHS and all they do but I'm a spoilt German who is used to much better healthcare... so seeing the waiting times for a gynaecologist being 'up to 40 weeks for 9/10 women' at my local hospital is just shocking. In Germany I would call my gynaecologist and would be seen within a week to discuss.

@NoCallerID I can only imagine what you're going through. If you can go private, definitely do. I love the NHS and they were brilliant helping with my boys but any referrals with a waiting list are a nightmare. I hope someone listens to you and soon x

Thanks @Kiki275
I had a call from my GP earlier. She's been doing some reading on the condition and also on the trial. And although she says the trial cannot favour anyone, meaning there's no better or worse treatment (I think there is since one is antibiotics known to treat CE and the other one is probably just sugar or something) she said she'll speak to the consultant at my local hospital who has treated me before to see if she would do the biopsy and if that came back positive, would she do the antibiotics too as apparently it's not something that comes up as being treated or even looked into in this country. She also said even the urgent referral takes 2 months so recommend I should keep going with the option of the trial for now. It's just a lot to take in at the moment. My head is all over the place and I had a full on cry when she asked me how I was holding up throughout this all and if I needed support I can always get in touch. It was really nice of her but it's also made me realise that this is all actually happening.
Sorry, rant over.

I was back in hospital on Wednesday night with pain. They scanned me yesterday and my consultant told me I’m ovulating. We dtd the day before ovulation and the day after, and today - my opks haven’t picked it up but the ultrasound and my bbt seem to suggest it happened. I just hope we caught it. Is it worth continuing to try tomorrow and Sunday

@NoCallerID no need to apologise, rant away!! It is a lot to take in and so many decisions to make, your emotions must be all over the place x

@CorkViaDublin hope you're okay, glad they didn't find anything worrying. Will keep everything crossed for you x

@AlexaPlayWhiteNoise I saw you'd posted on penguin huddle (which I'm also on). Just wanted to tag you in here as well as we've all been through TFMRs here if you needed any extra support x

[quote Kiki275]@AlexaPlayWhiteNoise I saw you'd posted on penguin huddle (which I'm also on). Just wanted to tag you in here as well as we've all been through TFMRs here if you needed any extra support x[/quote]
Thank you kiki I just found you all! And I'm so glad I have! ❤️

I recognize some names from my bereavement thread. I'm 7 days on and feeling slightly brighter this afternoon, although I'm now waiting for the next black hole. The rollercoaster of emotion is so massive.

I'm Alexa, 34, I had a TfMR last Saturday for a diagnosis of severe spina bifida. My beautiful boy was born at 21+4 and lived for an hour and a half. I'm struggling a lot with guilt and all the feelings that go with that too. It's just shit isn't it?

Physically I'm not even nearly ready to TTC, and I've got to be taking the 5g of folic acid for a minimum of a month prior to conceiving anyway. So I've spent the last two days googling every vitamin that could help and deciding to follow a GI diet. I was being investigated for PCOS prior to falling pregnant with my boy so I'm assuming that the uncontrolled insulin/glucose made him poorly.

I'm so sorry to everyone who finds themselves in this position, 🌷🌻🌹

@AlexaPlayWhiteNoise welcome and sorry you find yourself here. So sorry to hear of your little boy, it will still be very raw for you.
I had my TFMR on July 14th at 15 weeks for severe hydrops caused by T21. I delivered a little boy also, Joseph.
Thinking of you and be gentle with yourself xx