Support thread for women who are pregnant or TTC following a termination for abnormalities. Thread 7

[Kiki275]

Welcome to the newest thread of support for those ladies who are pregnant or trying to conceive after terminating for abnormalities. Since this thread first began (almost ten years ago!) there have been stories of heart break, sadness and fear, but from these stories there have also been stories of happiness, success and most importantly, hope.

[quote Dia12]@Balajake you have your name and details on the scan....[/quote]
It’s fine. Just my name and DOB. Nothing anyone can’t see on FB

@Balajake I am absolutely heartbroken for you. I'm so so sorry. I'm keeping everything crossed that the scan shows a miracle ❤️

@Mummabear40 stay positive. Right now your baby's heart is beating and they are right in saying it can be very inaccurate this early. Different sonographers measure differently and at this stage a fraction of a millimetre can make days of a difference.

@CorkViaDublin I'm so sorry. I've been there so many times and it's heartbreaking every damn time.

Just not sure how much more I can’t take. Had to hobble through cooking and cleaning yesterday in pain and bleeding and just feel like nobody cares at all. I just want to scream. Currently lay alone in bed crying.

balajake I'm so so sorry, how utterly shit. Thinking of you and sending love.

Also thinking of you mummabear

In fact I've been thinking of all of us 🕯️💙🌷

@Balajake I’m so sorry that really is so shit. 💔

@Balajake I'm so, so sorry you're going through this, it's so unfair. Sending love ❤️

@Mummabear40 try and stay positive, my first scan in this pregnancy was at 8 weeks and I was measured at 7, but caught up by my 12 week scan x

It's been a whirlwind week for me, contractions started on Sunday night and my gorgeous little boy was delivered safe and sound at 4pm on Monday. There were a few scary moments and he was born in theatre by forceps, but all is well. I cannot quite believe I got to bring a healthy baby home with me.

Thinking of you all, and hope you have managed to enjoy Christmas. Wishing you all rainbow babies soon 💕

How wonderful @1stbabs - congratulations on your healthy baby boy 💕 how are you doing?

I'm sorry for what you're having to go through. It does feel very very lonely. Do you have anyone you can speak to? Have been thinking of you. xx

@Balajake I'm so sorry to hear you're going through this. I wish I could do something to help xx

@1stbabs wonderful news! I'm so pleased that the year has finished on a high for you xx

@1stbabs congratulations, absolutely brilliant news x

Thank you so much ladies... @Dia12 I'm sore and tired but so happy ❤️ x

So many congratulations 1stbabs on your beautiful baby boy. What a wonderful Christmas gift 💙🌟 xxx

Congratulations @1stbabs !! It must be such a relief to have a healthy baby!
@Balajake, it is so unfair that you have to go through this! Could you possibly contact your bereavement midwife or your GP for some advice ? I am so sorry for you!

Congratulations on your rainbow 🌈 @1stbabs xxx

Thank you all ❤️

Hello I am hoping someone can help or offer advice. I am just over 9 weeks post TFMR due to T21. The devastation has been overwhelming and me and my husband have decided we want to start trying again ASAP, not replacing our angel we lost but to bring us hope again.

I had retained placenta and blood loss so had surgery post delivery and I was never advised to take a pregnancy test after. Anyway I have had one period and since we have had unprotected sex (not a lot though) and I have no idea when I ovulate so it was more just to start not being careful.

Anyway second period hasn’t shown up and I did a FRER today and there was a very faint line. Is the likely to be the prev pregnancy? And HCG still not back to normal? Or is there a chance I’m pregnant. I don’t want to get my hopes up.

Sorry for long msg. Any advice or stories on anyone conceiving again so soon? I’m confused now xxxx

@Bbf25010320

Hello I am hoping someone can help or offer advice. I am just over 9 weeks post TFMR due to T21. The devastation has been overwhelming and me and my husband have decided we want to start trying again ASAP, not replacing our angel we lost but to bring us hope again.

I had retained placenta and blood loss so had surgery post delivery and I was never advised to take a pregnancy test after. Anyway I have had one period and since we have had unprotected sex (not a lot though) and I have no idea when I ovulate so it was more just to start not being careful.

Anyway second period hasn’t shown up and I did a FRER today and there was a very faint line. Is the likely to be the prev pregnancy? And HCG still not back to normal? Or is there a chance I’m pregnant. I don’t want to get my hopes up.

Sorry for long msg. Any advice or stories on anyone conceiving again so soon? I’m confused now xxxx

Im so sorry for your loss bbf. I understand what you mean, it will never replace, but to find hope in a dark situation. Offering hugs.

I started taking the 5mg dose of folic acid two days after losing our boy (six weeks post TfMR at 21+4 for spina bifida) with the intention to start ttc again after my cycle settles. I just needed to make sure i was doing something positive if you know what I mean.

In your situation, with a positive test (tentative congratulations!) Then I think I'd phone my bereavement midwife or community MW and see what they advise. I'm not sure if it differs area to area but you might be sent for a scan at the EPU to check it was old HCG still in your system or a new pregnancy. Really, hoping for you. Will keepy fingers crossed xx

@Bbf25010320 sorry you find yourself here abs sorry for your loss.

My personal experience is that my HCG returned to normal after my first proper period. But I would definitely call someone to discuss and check with as @AlexaPlayWhiteNoise advises. Hoping it’s good news for you.

How are you doing balajake? Thinking of you xx

And you mumma How's everything going?

How is everyone? Xx

Thank you so much for replying ladies it helps so much to share the anxieties.

@AlexaPlayWhiteNoise I have also been taking folic acid, DHA and CoQ10 since my first period as I knew we would eventually try again and wanted to be confident it was all in my system and a chance to help my body with nice healthy eggs. Sadly I was never put in touch with a bereavement midwife but I will call the hospital and see what they say. I might wait a few days to see if the line gets darker as it’s VERY faint and I did it late in the day.

@Mummabear40 thank you for sharing your experience, it’s such a whirlwind going through all these possibilities, worries and not knowing your body. I’m almost nervous to be pregnant so soon and worry if my body isn’t ready. I would like to think my HCG is normal again after having the surgery to clear my uterus and having had a period since, but I would hate to let myself believe anything at the moment either way.

Sending love to all the women on her who need it and thank you for helping me x

I’m still bleeding and losing clots. Had an exam today and cervix is closed whatever that means. Having a scan in 2 days to make sure nothing is retained, they didn’t want to scan today because I only got scanned on the 24th and fetal pole was present then

My tests are getting lighter so I know this baby is gone 😞

@Bbf25010320 sorry you find yourself here. I too had a tfmr 5 weeks ago. Yes, it seems it is common to have this strong urge to become pregnant again. My consultant said you start ovulating as soon as your bleeding from tfmr stops. Different doctors/midwives seem to have different opinion on when you can start TTC again. Some say you can start straight away while others suggest waiting for 3-6 months. One midwife explained to me that these waiting times are more for historical reasons as before scanning days, they used LMP for dating. So, yes you can potentially be pregnant 😊.
I would suggest contacting your GP or midwife too. They can check if it is HCG from previous pregnancy or this one by doing some blood draws for some consecutive days. If it is from previous pregnancy, the HCG level does not go up whereas if it is from this one it will go up.
We haven’t started TTC yet as I am still waiting for my first period. I am taking multivitamins and concentrating on getting to a healthy place now and that is keeping me going 🙂.

@Balajake I’m very sorry ! Now that your cervix is closed, hopefully all the tissues are out and you don’t have problems with retained tissues etc. Once you get coffee coloured discharge, the bleeding will stop. Are you still in pain. Hugs x

@Balajake - I am new to this forum conversation but I want to say how sorry I am to read your latest post. I am sending you so much love and hugs xxxx

@Mummabear40 how are you? The first few weeks go very slowly, isn’t it? Hopefully once you are past 12 and 16 weeks early anomaly scan, you can relax a little into this pregnancy.

Hi @Alice40p thanks so much for your reply. I might contact my GP and ask if they can do that, I am assuming if I took another test in 2-3 days and it’s darker line that’s a sign it’s a new pregnancy? Or can that happen with old HCG xx