Support thread for women who are pregnant or TTC following a termination for abnormalities. Thread 7

[Kiki275]

Welcome to the newest thread of support for those ladies who are pregnant or trying to conceive after terminating for abnormalities. Since this thread first began (almost ten years ago!) there have been stories of heart break, sadness and fear, but from these stories there have also been stories of happiness, success and most importantly, hope.

@Alice40p I hate how dismissive your hospitals or GPS are being. I was very lucky with my GAU as as soon as I felt there was a problem they got me in immediately, started me on abx and organised some repeat scans. I was having pain which I put down to what I’d been through but apparently after the first couple of days you should have no pain. I had tissues blocking the neck of my womb which the consultant removed with forceps so although my bleeding appeared to have stopped it actually hadn’t. If you have any doubts at all be pushy! The last thing you want is retained products left behind for too long. I’m sorry you’re going through this worry when you’ve already been through enough. I did a pregnancy test 3 weeks after as advised but it was still positive I was negative by 4 weeks post tho xxx

@Dia12 we have a private scan booked at 11 weeks when we have our NIPT and they spend more time looking at things so hopefully this will help this time around.
The NT fluid was 2.5 on our 12 week scan also and the sonography guy said that it was on the very top of ‘ok’ @Alice40p but required looking into further. Our screening results then came back high so we were sent to a consultant. Scanned again at 13 weeks and the fluid was 3.5 at this point. Went back at 14 weeks after the results of our NIPT came back 99% chance of abnormalities and by this scan the fluid was 5.5 and surrounding our little boy with him having very little chance of survival past this point. It’s actually incredible how quickly it went from fine to the opposite of fine. Hopefully all the extra checks this time around will help.

I did a cheap internet HPT at 5/6 weeks after I had finally stopped bleeding and it was negative by then @Alice40p. Give it a couple of weeks and test then. Keeping fingers crossed you're all clear soon.

I'm also thinking we should perhaps book a private scan and test. It's at least a quicker way than waiting for hospital appointment, doing the biochemical bloods then opting for NIPT.
I'm expecting the biochemical tests to be high considering age and I'm heavier than I was before as I didn't manage to lose weight after termination. 🤦🏻‍♀️

On a lighter note, i ordered some prenatal vitamins - Naturelo. Sounded very wholesome and natural......wonderful, if only they didn't absolutely reek of stale putrid fish. And there are THREE to take in a day. I honestly have to hold my nose and it gives me fishy burps 🤢🤢🤢
I think of the I'm a celeb jungle trials each time I have one.
Gross!

@Alice40p my hpt test was positive until about 4 weeks after my TFMR, it went negative just before my period arrived.

I’ve opted to go straight for the NIPT @Dia12 as they said I would screen high risk anyway due to being 40 🙄

@Mummabear40 and @Dia12, yes, the FMU said the blood test will flag me as high risk anyway next time because of my age. I think if I get pregnant again, I shall do a NIPT first.
You must be feeling more anxious this time around, isn’t it? Hopefully you will breeze through this pregnancy!
@Dia12 I had no pregnancy symptoms in my first normal healthy pregnancy but with my tfmr pregnancy I had all symptoms. So I guess it doesn’t mean much.
@Redhead43 thanks for sharing hpt info. I might do a test perhaps at the end of this month.

FMU also said they will automatically offer me a CVS next time.

I've turned all targeted advertising off on my FB and for some reason I'm getting pro-life videos in my Watch feed. There aren't enough sweary report buttons ☹️ x

Jumping in on this thread and hope that’s ok. I don’t know the rules of these things! I had a TFMR in October at 16 weeks for T21 and am starting to feel ready to try again but am so full of anxiety. I am taking so many supplements I’m rattling and have been reading that ‘it starts with the egg’ book and doing a few things from there to try and help. But worrying myself silly that every time I have a bit of alcohol or go near cleaning products etc that I’m going to cause something to go wrong again! I know it’s irrational! I had two miscarriages prior to the TFMR pregnancy and beginning to think I should just give up to save myself the worry and sadness of things going wrong! I’m nearly 39 and have an older child and we are all happy and healthy but would love another child. Just scared! Hospital seem to think it was all just one of those sad things and it’s fine to go for it again. How have you managed the worry?!

Guys. I think I just got a vvvvvv fp on a frer. I’m 9dpo

@corkviadublin that's amazing news. Will you retest in a few days?
I have my non invasive test today. Really nervous but kind of glad the results won't be in before Christmas

@crispmonster12 sorry you find yourself here but it's good you feel ready to try again. It's so hard to stop the worry, just taking it in little milestones helps. Have you been offered any support from the hospital for when you do get a positive test again? I was offered a few reassurance scans which has helped. X

crisps bbf and alice I'm so sorry you find yourselves here.

Cork !! I will keep all my fingers crossed for you!! Really really hope you get a Christmas bfp!

How is everyone? Thinking of you all this week xx

@CrispMonster12 I'm sorry you're in this boat with us. It's hard when there's no one to blame, as you pin it all on yourself. It's a giant lottery, in which I'm trying not to worry too much about things I cannot control. One day at a time x

Lovely news @CorkViaDublin x

Good luck @mrsof20118 x

I’ll test again on Wednesday and see what happens:) I’m terrified

Sorry to hear what you have been through @CrispMonster12. I've read "it's starts with the egg" and followed the advice....some of it does make you super paranoid (especially when I now handle till receipts) but is generally very helpful.
Sounds like you are doing all the right things, now you just need to relax and look after your mental health.
The journey is fraught with worry and some women here have had wonderful support from their hospitals and bereavement midwives.
I, unfortunately haven't been so lucky at birmingham women's, who have just left me to it.
I would really suggest to get a plan in place now of what to expect from your hospital when you do (🤞🏼) fall pregnant again. That way you know what help to expect and who to lean on for support.

Wonderful news @CorkViaDublin !
Did you have any symptoms that made you check early?
Keeping everything crossed for you.

Ohh thanks @Balajake how are?

@CorkViaDublin ohhhh that's amazing! 🤞🏼

I've had my first biopsy this morning and am now waiting for the results for the next 3-4 weeks. Husbands karyotyping has come back fine but they forgot to do mine so I'm in for another few weeks wait on that. I'm trying to be positive although there's obviously a lot of what ifs. My other bloods have come back perfect.

Sorry guys I've really not kept up well on here but I really hope you're all doing ok in the lead up to this for many reasons difficult Christmas 😘

@Dia12 are you still under Birmingham? Could you change to Coventry?

@NoCallerID

Ohh thanks *@Balajake* how are?

@CorkViaDublin ohhhh that's amazing! 🤞🏼

I've had my first biopsy this morning and am now waiting for the results for the next 3-4 weeks. Husbands karyotyping has come back fine but they forgot to do mine so I'm in for another few weeks wait on that. I'm trying to be positive although there's obviously a lot of what ifs. My other bloods have come back perfect.

Sorry guys I've really not kept up well on here but I really hope you're all doing ok in the lead up to this for many reasons difficult Christmas 😘

Glad to hear you’re getting tests done and will hopefully get some answers. It must be such a worrying time xx ❤️

I’m doing ok thanks. My scan on the 30th was cancelled and moved to Saturday the 2nd when I’ll be 8 weeks 4 days. Have to say I was both anxious but relieved. I’m really scared of having the scan I must say. I’m going to break down when I go in there I know it

Hey guys.
I don’t know why I don’t get email notifications anymore when people reply @Dia12 I had sore boobs and just a really weird feeling that I was

Glad you've had your biopsy and your bloods have come back normal @NoCallerID. Hopefully the next month or so will pass by quickly and the study can provide you with some insight...and perhaps a bit of a break to recharge?

I really am considering moving my care over to warwick but right now I don't know what I'm facing with this pregnancy and I may need to remain at BWH due to their fetal medicine unit. Dare not think that far ahead.
In the meanwhile I've booked scan and NIPT with MUMs for when I'm 10w.

Scared of getting scanned like you @Balajake - hope you're keeping well otherwise.

@Balajake glad to hear you're doing ok. I get that, I'd be scared too. Probably even more so now... I guess we all just know too many things now. I'm certain you'll see a heartbeat and a little happy nugget ❤️ and your husband can thankfully come now!

@Dia12 I was at Warwick and only went to BWH for my CVS. The care I've had at Warwick, especially from the screening midwife has been amazing and still continues to be if I call with any odd questions, I really can't fault them.

@Balajake @Dia12 I gave my first scan on Christmas Eve, I’ll be 7 weeks and I’ve already started having weird scan dreams. I’m absolutely dreading it and I hate that I feel like that.

Hey guys. I did a CB today and got a negative. The FRER was faint but definitely there yesterday
I’m worried now that it’s still hcg from the miscarriage Oct 30. Is that possible?
I did loads of cheapie ones today and they were neg. I’ll try again tomorrow with FMU. I won’t use a frer in case I’m only picking up old hcg ?? Anyone had similar experience

@CorkViaDublin I thought FRER were more sensitive than CB. I'm afraid all you can do is watch, wait and retest as awful as that sounds. When is AF due & how many DPO are you?x