Support thread for women who are pregnant or TTC following a termination for abnormalities. Thread 7

[Kiki275]

Welcome to the newest thread of support for those ladies who are pregnant or trying to conceive after terminating for abnormalities. Since this thread first began (almost ten years ago!) there have been stories of heart break, sadness and fear, but from these stories there have also been stories of happiness, success and most importantly, hope.

How wonderful @Redhead43 -
Congratulations on your healthy pregnancy and baby 💕 hope it continues in the same way.
Are you beginning to enjoy the pregnancy now?

I haven't told any friends or family...can't even say it out loud between ourselves and this time we haven't rushed out to get hcg tested nor early scans so far. We are way too frightened.

Thanks @Dia12 I’m starting to settle down - I think I’ll be happy once we’ve had our next scan when our consultant has had a proper look at baby’s heart. We didn’t have any extra scans than what fetal med called us for which was 8 and 12 week scan. We only told our parents at 13 weeks and haven’t told anyone else still so I know that feeling - it’s been nice to keep it to ourselves to be honest. How are you doing? xx

I bet it was lovely sharing with your parents. I feel so bad not telling my DM and alleviating some of her worry for us but that's the thing, it wouldn't alleviate worry...
Strangely enough she called me the day we got our BFP and said she'd had a strange dream that signalled some good news for us!
But right now, I can only really deal with my own head at the moment. Still checking my underwear for bleeding...and trying to be hopeful and optimistic but very quietly. I'm scared out of my mind for when I have to step foot back in that hospital for a scan.
May have a chat with SANDS/ARC again as they've previously been so helpful.

@Redhead43 this is such lovely news!! Congratulations xxx

Thank you @Kiki275 ❤️

@Dia12 by not telling anyone you tend to find you don’t have to even talk about it and I have to say it was easier to almost forget because no one was asking how you’re feeling etc. Me and my husband haven’t even spoken about it really because both of us were scared of being too attached. I cried at both my scans and with my consultant a mixture of anxiety before being told anything and then happiness that all seemed okay. Its a naivety we’ve all been stolen of which is so sad xx

@Redhead43 that is wonderful news, congratulations! 💕 xx

@Redhead43 we aren’t telling anyone either, working from home and people not allowed in your home will make this easier lol I want to wait as long as possible to tell family and friends. My parents will worry too much and I just want to avoid questions until we are sure.

The upside about TFMRs is you know exactly who is there for you, who isn't and who is just there for the gossip. We will probably wait until new year to tell those who were supported us. From 12 weeks on it'll be need to know as and when we see them. Everyone else will be after 20 weeks. I'm tired of my uterus and my decisions being the focus of so many conversations, from people who couldn't even be arsed sending so much as a thinking of you text message x

redhead that is wonderful news!

Hoping everyone is having a good day. This thread, the hope and positivity and understanding has been a godsend.

I've started my first PP period. Which I'm genuinely pleased by, it feels like I'm having a factory reset (if that makes sense).

@AlexaPlayWhiteNoise that's good to hear.x

@CorkViaDublin, @LittleLottieChaos, @SlipperTripper @JustStuck hope the Xmas miracles are happening to you too?x

@Coffeeoverload how are you managing with your grief? We're still here for you x

@1stbabs keeping everything crossed for you this week xx

Hey @Kiki275 I’m doing OPKs but they said I ovulated Saturday but I don’t think that’s possible and I’m very confused about what my body is doing :( we dtd Friday and Saturday and today so who knows

@CorkViaDublin why is that not possible do you think? Your body has been through a lot and may just be taking time to get back to normal xx

Just seems to have come out of the blue with no build up a week before it was due? I missed the opk window yesterday

@CorkViaDublin there's nearly 20 hours between those two tests. It you still need to do OPKs next cycle (hoping you don't) then try doing two a day, 12 hours apart from say CD10(ish). Then even more when you see a ride. 24 hours can be the difference between low and peak. I've attached an example of mine x

I think we will still keep trying for a few days now because my other apps are saying I’m not due to ovulate for another 6 days. It’s all so confusing

@CorkViaDublin for the time being I'd ignore your other app. Keep the info in mind but it's working off previous patterns which will have changed with pregnancy. Mine certainly did, my previous app was Flo which I can update with +ve OPK data x

I’ll check my bbt in the morning too and see what that reveals

@Kiki275 hey! I’m sorry I’ve not be on here so much. But hectic with a new job (which has been a great distraction...) AMAZING to hear your fab news, what a great Christmas present for you!

No luck for us as of yet but we shall be continuing trying... I do hope everyone else is getting on well and also taking time to enjoy Christmas! I’ll be honest - whilst I am keen, I also quite want to enjoy some Bailey’s and am looking forward to seeing the the back of 2020! It can do one.

I’ve had my letter through today for my 12 week scan and it just doesn’t mean anything to me like it usually would. Usually there would be excitement and I’d be counting down. But I’m not excited at all and I hate that that’s been taken away from me. I hope at some point I get to enjoy this 😭

@Mummabear40, Yes, this experience just sucks the joy of the entire process.
I’m feeling very depressed now! I was so looking forward to being in my second trimester this Christmas! Now I feel it has all been snatched away from me! I’m also still bleeding although it is more like spotting now. Is it normal to bleed for 2 weeks? Also I’m having nightmares every night these days, so am not able to sleep well ! Hope there is some light at the end of this tunnel!

@AlexaPlayWhiteNoise Glad you are on your first period, I think I shall feel better once I have had mine too.
Great to hear all the BFP stories, fills me with a bit of hope! All the very best!

@Alice40p I bled for 2-3 after before my first proper period. From memory quite a few people on here have had long bleeds too. It really does suck. Sorry for you going through this. x

@Alice40p I bled for nearly 6 weeks on and off. It was extremely frustrating x

@Alice40p I bled for 2-3 weeks with a brief stop before my 1st period which was much heavier than before pregnancy. Those early days and weeks were the worst ever so I really feel for you. I can assure you that there is light and you will feel better than this. It never goes away completely but you will feel okay again and be yourself again xx

@AlexaPlayWhiteNoise I felt physically better after my first period and it gave me that reassurance that my body still knew what to do xx

@Mummabear40 congrats on your 12 week letter. I hope that scan gives you some reassurance so you can start to settle. I didn’t enjoy the scan I worried the whole time especially at measurement time. My husband said he felt better after and was reassured as they told us nothing but good things. I felt a small weight lift but I am on the count down to the next scan like it’s another milestone we have to pass xx

Hi,
has anyone with BFPs experienced continued spotting over several days. Mine was confirmed on a digital this morning but I'm still getting continued brown spotting, only tiny amounts, but enough to unnerve me a little. My booking in isn't for another month yet so not sure where to turn 😩 x

Just thought I'd pop on to say congratulations to all you ladies who got your BFPS and fingers crossed 🤞🏼 all goes well this time and good luck to all you still TTC hope this thread gives you luck as this month seems to be a lucky month!! My little rainbow is keeping me busy!! Don't lose hope I had her after 2 TFMRs and had a 50% of her having one type of abnormality and a 1% chance of T21 but she was ok!! Xxx