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Support thread for women who are pregnant or TTC after a termination for abnormalities - Thread 6

999 replies

Treaclepie19 · 16/03/2020 10:15

Welcome to the newest thread of support for those ladies who are pregnant or trying to conceive after terminating for abnormalities. Since this thread first began (almost ten years ago!) there have been stories of heart break, sadness and fear, but from these stories there have also been stories of happiness, success and most importantly, hope. Here they are, our thread babies, and may the list continue to grow:

@Mishtabel - Bella 22/01/10
@Linspins – Franklin 22/01/10
@Shangrila – baby boy 01/02/10
@Cantdothisagain – Babycan't 12/04/10
@Katerina100 – baby boy 06/10
@NumptyMum - Josie 28/06/10
@Allstarsprincess – Frank 30/07/10
@Katiecubs - Felix 13/08/10
@GinaFB – Alexander 03/01/11
@LittlePoot - Jacob 02/02/11
@Coffeeandchocolate – Coffeebean 22/02/11
@Rushingrachel – Oliver 02/03/11
@Crazycatlady - Lawrence 08/03/11
@Dramamama - Isabella 13/03/11
@VivClicquot - Phoebe 28/04/11
@LisbethSalander - baby boy 7/11
@Stormbird – George 24/07/11
@Sarahmia – baby girl 25/07/11
@Eavers – Jacob 11/08/11
@Grandj – Eliot 01/09/11
@Babylily – Miles 05/09/11
@NatzCNL - Sienna 26/09/11
@Manitz - Sacha 28/09/11
@Cherrybug – Kade 02/11/11
@Ghislaine - Charles 14/01/12
@Mrsbigz - Callum 19/01/12
@MyangelAva - Isabella 21/1/12
@Bezzyk - Minibez II 2/2/12
@Katerina100 – baby girl 19/04/2012
@flower11 – Hannah 18/10/2012
@Bluecat83 – Noah est 24/10/2012
@katiecubs – Seth 05/02/2013
@Havingkittens – Alfred 14/04/2013
@ghislane – Frederick 22/10/2013
@lostlove – baby boy est 10/04/14
@AliBingo – baby boy est 06/05/14
@LuckyAugust –baby boy 26/01/2015

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otterbaby · 07/04/2020 08:43

@Treaclepie19 we're in a similar boat, our chromosomal abnormality didn't fall in the main 3 either and could only be picked up by a CVS/amnio. I just keep telling myself that the nt was normal so there's no reason to think anything would be amiss...but it is hard not to second guess, isn't it?

From what I've read, if there is anything up you'll more than likely find out at the 20 week scan. So we're just trying to hold out for that one!

Treaclepie19 · 07/04/2020 08:50

@otterbaby I'm so sorry you're in the same position but it is good to have a buddy.
Our 20 week scan with Jesse only showed a potential heart issue. I keep telling myself though that that was 2 warning signs so if we get any at the 20 week scan we should have an amnio then.
Like you say, the nuchal is such a big indicator.

I'm a right wreck today though. My 4yo is struggling with DH working from home because he wants to play with him.
I'm struggling to keep on top of all the worries especially now I'm worried I've got a clot or something.
Then the worries about baby. Trying to deal with my OCD. Trying to keep the house tidy.
Feels a bit like I'm sinking today 😔

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BooMamaBear · 07/04/2020 09:41

The NT on my baby was 1.3mm but my chromosomal abnormality isn't indicated by this -it's chromosome 19 so CVS is the only way to find out unless the baby dies or doesn't move pre-birth! They do check for the 3 trisomy conditions anyway even if the NT is normal coz they may as well as they have a sample! My first TFMR was positive for MD (the genetic chromosomal abnormality) and Down syndrome which makes my risk of have another baby with Downs higher at 1 in 100 but my last two, this one included, were not affected by Down Syndrome! Xx

otterbaby · 07/04/2020 09:42

@Treaclepie19 that does sound really tough 😔 being stuck inside as well just seems to exacerbate everything we're already feeling. Hopefully you can get yourself a nice coffee and your day improves x

Treaclepie19 · 07/04/2020 12:17

We've talked it through and I think we might go for the amnio.
Unknowingly bringing a baby as poorly as our little boy would have been into the world at the moment wouldn't be the best idea and I can't get that out of my head.

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otterbaby · 07/04/2020 13:08

Is the condition he had more likely to happen again because your last baby was diagnosed with that? Or is the chance factor the same?

Treaclepie19 · 07/04/2020 13:45

@otterbaby it's an odd one.
They said the risk does increase but they cant tell me why. They said its true of all chromosomal issues that once you've had one issue you're more at risk than someone who hasn't.

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Kiki275 · 07/04/2020 14:21

Hi everyone,
tentatively joining as I am so broody! All I can think of is getting pregnant again. We lost our twins following surgery for TTTS and my waters broke. I had my tmfr on 18th March so it really isn't ideal for us to be trying yet. Plus, I'm so angry at the world right now, DH won't come anywhere near me. I hate grieving in this lockdown.
Wishing everyone the best of luck. You've each and every one been in a horrendous situation and I truly wish happier times for you xx

BooMamaBear · 07/04/2020 14:25

Sorry for your losses welcome but sorry you find yourself here xx

elcie1980 · 07/04/2020 18:53

Good evening all
I hope you are all ok and surviving COVID 19. Just checking in... I haven’t been on this group since December 19. November I was 17+6 when my partner and I had a TRMR. Confirmed DS and a high NT value (6.1). Looking back my little boy was definitely guiding me as I would be due in May and in the height of all this craziness (my belief is everything is for a reason and he is my guardian angel).
So it’s been a bit of a rollercoaster since the TFMR... on the day it all went well, bleeding post was all very text book. Fast forward to now.. not 100% sure I have had a full period as I have also had a little infection (BV nothing drastic) which took a while to be properly diagnosed. Only when I went for routine smear did I ask the nurse if she could see if there was anything abnormal so performed a swab test and diagnosed so good old metronidazole. My partner works abroad so after all this we haven’t seen each other for a few months but it’s given me and my body time to heal. Lockdown has certainly given us time together to start trying again. Yesterday ovulation sticks registered peak fertility so fingers crossed. Again with all the goings on below still not 100% sure of complete period previously.
Stay well and safe everyone

Grassisgreener99 · 09/04/2020 13:13

Hi all,

Congratulations on those healthy pregnancies! Hope everything is going well. It’s so difficult waiting for results.

We had our baby girls cremation yesterday which was as special as it could have been, I’m so glad we did it and I officially told those who didn’t know - after a month of almost hiding from everyone apart from immediate family and friends. I feel like that’s one milestone completed but still have the post-mortem results to come. So strange that last night I passed a small clot and stopped bleeding on the day we said a finale goodbye- almost like my body knew.

Our baby had HPE which cannot be detected on screening tests - the harmony test come back low risk for everything, so we cannot start trying again until we have the results as to why this happened. Although it’s giving my body time to recover, it’s also difficult to have to wait. I’m also so anxious about another pregnancy as having had a healthy son we assumed everything would be ok so I think the next will be full of worry.

I hope everyone is staying safe and enjoying some ☀️ X

Balajake · 10/04/2020 08:33

I’m 7/8dpo today and from 5/6dpo I’ve had lots of cramping like period about to start. I knows it’s early but I caved and tested . I inverted them so you can see slight colour on the test line. It’s deffo not hormone from last pregnancy as I did loads of tests after and they were stark white negative.

I’m not sure if this is definitely the start of my BFP again but I’m hoping it is. Hoping if it is that it sticks and nothing goes wrong. If my period comes I can handle it because I know having a full cycle is preferable. Period not really due for another 6 days as I’m like clockwork but I usually only get cramping this early if pregnant. You never know though after a termination though

Support thread for women who are pregnant or TTC after a termination for abnormalities - Thread 6
BooMamaBear · 10/04/2020 22:55

@Treaclepie19 -how are you are you still going ahead with the Amnio when will it be?-have you got all your results yet @Mangoandbroccoli? Xxx

Treaclepie19 · 10/04/2020 22:58

@Balajake I hope things work out and this is a bfp and nice easy pregnancy for you.

@BooMamaBear I'm a bit of a mess still. Saw the doctor today for blood tests to check that this rib pain isn't a clot. He was positive it wasn't but just to make sure.
Not sure on the amnio front. We've made a plan to ring the consultant and ask to talk things over and make a decision from there.
I'm so scared of baby being healthy but miscarrying because of the amnio if we have one.

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BooMamaBear · 10/04/2020 23:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

1stbabs · 11/04/2020 00:01

Can't quite believe this but looks like I've got my BFP! I'm only 4 weeks so a long way to go until 16 weeks when they can look for the condition, but one day at a time I guess!

Support thread for women who are pregnant or TTC after a termination for abnormalities - Thread 6
1stbabs · 11/04/2020 00:03

Hope everybody is doing ok, and I am sad to see there are some new losses, I'm very sorry you find yourselves here but welcome x

@Balajake fingers crossed this is the start of your bfp x

BooMamaBear · 11/04/2020 00:10

Yay definite BFP congratulations @1stbabs xx

Treaclepie19 · 11/04/2020 06:12

@BooMamaBear this has been bad when breathing so he said best to check. I think its a digestive thing, plus my bump seems to be pushing upwards this time so I guess that's moving things about.
Yeah the risk is 1 in 150 so I'm being silly really. I reckon we will have it, I'm wondering if they will do it when I go for my next scan.
Its scheduled for 4th May but I'll only be 17+5 and its meant to be my 20 week scan so 18-22 weeks.
I'm 14+3 today so it's not long until they can do the amnio now.

Congratulations @1stbabs!! Hope things progress quickly and easily for you Flowers

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Mangoandbroccoli · 11/04/2020 11:02

@1stbabs Yay, fantastic news!!! Will keep everything crossed for you for a blissfully uneventful journey x

@BooMamaBear No NIPT results yet - 3 weeks waiting so far and now in Easter holidays 🙈 Btw - all your personal details are on your lovely scan photo x

1stbabs · 11/04/2020 11:52

Thank you ladies 🥰

BooMamaBear · 12/04/2020 15:49

God didn't even think about that @Mangoandbroccoli! My 20 weeks scan is when I'm 19+2 as well it's crazy coz all the normal 12 weeks scan are late and a lot of 20 week ones are early!! Xx

ShootingStar2020 · 13/04/2020 20:37

@Mangoandbroccoli - so sorry it is 3 weeks. Nightmare. Tomorrow?

@1stbabs - congratulations!! Lovely news.

Sorry I have been so quiet. MIL was moved into ICU today. It’s terrifying. Trying to stay strong for hubby. 8 weeks here. Just hoping everything is ok. Not sure how we would cope if we lost MIL and baby. Life does go on though. Day by day.

Big hugs to all xxxx

BooMamaBear · 13/04/2020 23:35

Oh @ShootingStar2020 sending hugs your way hope your MiL is ok! Xxx

Treaclepie19 · 14/04/2020 08:54

I'm so sorry @ShootingStar2020 I hope she will be okay Flowers

@Mangoandbroccoli hope your results appear soon!

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