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Support thread for women who are pregnant or TTC after a termination for abnormalities - Thread 5

984 replies

Conorgog · 07/08/2019 10:28

Welcome to the newest thread of support for those ladies who are pregnant or trying to conceive after terminating for abnormalities. Since this thread first began (almost ten years ago!) there have been stories of heart break, sadness and fear, but from these stories there have also been stories of happiness, success and most importantly, hope. Here they are, our thread babies, and may the list continue to grow:

@Mishtabel - Bella 22/01/10
@Linspins – Franklin 22/01/10
@Shangrila – baby boy 01/02/10
@Cantdothisagain – Babycan't 12/04/10
@Katerina100 – baby boy 06/10
@NumptyMum - Josie 28/06/10
@Allstarsprincess – Frank 30/07/10
@Katiecubs - Felix 13/08/10
@GinaFB – Alexander 03/01/11
@LittlePoot - Jacob 02/02/11
@Coffeeandchocolate – Coffeebean 22/02/11
@Rushingrachel – Oliver 02/03/11
@Crazycatlady - Lawrence 08/03/11
@Dramamama - Isabella 13/03/11
@VivClicquot - Phoebe 28/04/11
@LisbethSalander - baby boy 7/11
@Stormbird – George 24/07/11
@Sarahmia – baby girl 25/07/11
@Eavers – Jacob 11/08/11
@Grandj – Eliot 01/09/11
@Babylily – Miles 05/09/11
@NatzCNL - Sienna 26/09/11
@Manitz - Sacha 28/09/11
@Cherrybug – Kade 02/11/11
@Ghislaine - Charles 14/01/12
@Mrsbigz - Callum 19/01/12
@MyangelAva - Isabella 21/1/12
@Bezzyk - Minibez II 2/2/12
@Katerina100 – baby girl 19/04/2012
@flower11 – Hannah 18/10/2012
@Bluecat83 – Noah est 24/10/2012
@katiecubs – Seth 05/02/2013
@Havingkittens – Alfred 14/04/2013
@ghislane – Frederick 22/10/2013
@lostlove – baby boy est 10/04/14
@AliBingo – baby boy est 06/05/14
@LuckyAugust –baby boy 26/01/2015

OP posts:
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Treaclepie19 · 27/01/2020 18:24

Thanks @JO138! I shouldn't moan because they'll see us at 9/10 weeks but I really don't know if I can wait that long.

Treaclepie19 · 28/01/2020 10:03

I'm having one of those mornings.
I went to go and sort out my inhaler/get something for constipation/see if my chest is clear and they booked me in with the nurse. Who promptly told me she can't see me. Which would have been fine except she couldn't understand how she had tested me last monday and it was negative and now I'm pregnant. She kept on questioning me so much. How do you get to be a nurse and not understand pregnancy tests?
Anyway, I'm seeing the doctor later thankfully.
Rang the consultants team and they won't see me any earlier but have booked me in for 4th March when I will be 9+3.

JO138 · 28/01/2020 10:43

@treaclepie19 that sounds so frustrating. Sometimes I do really wonder how people end up in jobs that require "care". I know why I should not be a nurse, I would be awful! But that is why I'm not one! If you are concerned you could do a private scan. I did one last time at 7 weeks only because we were going on a 3 week overseas trip and I wanted some peace of mind. It was about £90.

I've just left the midwife. Got my combined bloods taken. I have to say you really have to advocate for yourself. Again the midwife said that I didn't need combined as I'd had the SAFE and I had to explain about the benefits of getting the NT reading! You can see how things get missed! Went to meet a friend after who lives nearby and managed a bacon and egg sandwich and a latte! 👍 I'm now waddling in to work. Sorry @Mini12 😬 Hope you are feeling better! ❤

Treaclepie19 · 28/01/2020 11:07

Honestly @JO138 I'm so frustrated. She didn't seem to understand that a test can be negative at day 23 and positive at day 26 🙄
My positivity is slowly disappearing if I'm honest. We may book a scan... I'm not sure what to do really. We always have had one about 6/7 weeks in the past.

I'm glad you've got your bloods done. Sorry the midwife was a bit useless 😩

I am starving. I've had breakfast and some crisps and I'm still hungry 🙈

Mini12 · 28/01/2020 14:26

@Treaclepie19 that sound so frustrating, you want to be congratulated on being pregnant not questioned! I'm 7 weeks +2 I keep telling myself not too be annoyed with it as last time I had no symptoms, I'm drinking lots of ginger tea, mint tea and eating my weight in bread and crisps!

@JO138 it's kinda ridiculous that you have to explained why u want the combined test knowing your history! Why do they make things so difficult!!
I have my 8 wk scan on Monday and just holding my breath til then really!

Treaclepie19 · 29/01/2020 10:07

Not feeling quite right this morning.
I have some shooting pains on the left side of my lower stomach and its driving me nuts worrying. Gah 😩

Hows everyone holding up?
@JO138 not long until your results now. Hope you're doing okay.

@Mini12 hope you get some relief from the sickness
I'm wondering if I will get any. Nothing so far. I cant remember when it started with ds1. I didnt have any with DS2 (our tfmr) or miscarriage.

JO138 · 29/01/2020 10:28

@Treaclepie19 ugh. Have you called the midwives if you are concerned? Doesn't hurt to get it checked.

I'm still waiting on results. I called twice yesterday and again this morning but nothing back yet. And now I'm totally panicked that it's bad news. I just can't #$%_ imagine what I will do if we are back in for another termination. I was up at 4am worrying and trying to think about what I would do to cope.

Treaclepie19 · 29/01/2020 10:30

@JO138 I reckon because it's so early they'll just say they cant do anything. I'm starting to feel this will end in an early miscarriage tbh.

Oh lovely, after what you've been through it's not surprising.
I'm keeping everything crossed that it's good results and remember the odds are in your favour.
If the worst happens though, you will get through. I promise Flowers

ShootingStar2020 · 29/01/2020 11:30

@Treaclepie19 - are you feeling any better? Sorry to hear you are having a bad day.

@JO138 - I can only imagine how you are feeling. It’s torture but agree with Treaclepie19 that the odds are in your favour. Hopefully they will arrive this afternoon. Can they at least tell you when they should be back? Feeling knackered after an early morning will not help either. Get yourself something nice for lunch to keep you keep going if the sickness is ok. Sending big hugs.

@Mini12 - bread and crisps sound good. Hopefully time is passing quickly for you. Xxxx

Treaclepie19 · 29/01/2020 11:42

@Shootingstar2020 it's going off a bit I think. Thank you!
I've rushed round tidying and hoovering so maybe that sorted it out.
Just off to get my son and then I think I may treat him (and me) to mcdonalds for lunch.

JO138 · 29/01/2020 14:39

Thanks ladies. I've called again just now and no results back. I know the odds are with us but I just want to KNOW now. The midwife said she would call me back if anything came in this afternoon.

I've just eaten a piece of chocolate brioche loaf the size of my head! I'm suddenly so hungry!

SylvanianFrenemies · 29/01/2020 16:31

Hi all. I'm afraid it is the end of the line for me. I found out I've had a missed miscarriage - should be 11 weeks, but the baby stopped growing some time ago, and the heartbeat, visible before, has stopped.

We won't be trying again as we had already decided this was the very last roll of the dice - and has resulted in the 3rd loss on a row. We are incredibly fortunate to have 2 amazing DDs already.

I wish you all the very best, and hope my bad luck skews the stats even further in your favour.

Treaclepie19 · 29/01/2020 17:03

@SylvanianFrenemies I am so, so sorry. There are no words. I'll be thinking of you Flowers

Mini12 · 29/01/2020 19:01

@SylvanianFrenemies so sorry for your loss, completely understand you not wanting to go through any more heartache, sending hugs Flowers

SylvanianFrenemies · 29/01/2020 20:07

Thanks @Treaclepie19and @Mini12, I really appreciate it.

ShootingStar2020 · 29/01/2020 20:53

@SylvanianFrenemies - I am really so so sorry to hear this. I joined this thread a little later but remember your bravery and support given to other women like me. I hope in time that things become easier for you and this limbo that is ttc gradually eases. ❤️

Hugs to everyone xxx

JO138 · 30/01/2020 06:46

@SylvanianFrenemies I am so sorry. That is such sad news. I completely understand not trying again. We will be the same if this pregnancy doesn't go well.

Thinking of you and hope that you and your partner are coping ok. ❤

Mangoandbroccoli · 30/01/2020 09:25

I'm so, so sorry @SylvanianFrenemies. Life can be so cruel. Thank you for all the support you've offered us all on this thread xx

JO138 · 30/01/2020 10:56

Just having a little cry in my office. SAFE test back and low risk for all three! 👍😊 T21 and T13 went down to less than one in a million! So relieved. I've been so wound up I feel like I need a nap now! 😴😴😴

ShootingStar2020 · 30/01/2020 11:15

@JO138 - that is really really good news!! Was thinking about you all morning. Nap and treat time! Xxx

JO138 · 30/01/2020 11:24

Thanks @shootingstar2020. I got myself in to such a lather I was terrified about what was going to come out of her mouth! I honestly just feel sapped! So silly! I am starting to understand how stress kills! 😬 Going to have to find myself a prenatal yoga class! 🤣🤣

Treaclepie19 · 30/01/2020 12:30

@JO138 what amazing news!!! I'm so happy for you ❤

Conorgog · 30/01/2020 13:31

@SylvanianFrenemies sending you a big hug, you’ve been through so much. X

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Conorgog · 30/01/2020 13:36

Woooooooootwoot @JO138

That is GREAT news. I’m so relieved for you. It’s getting so real! I also have booked pre natal yoga and a prenatal fitness class, LOL. Both will give me ‘alone time’ so that’s partially positive. Still have not told anyone (apart from best friend), having to really suck it in/modify work clothes already, wonder if people are suspicious 😂

How is everyone doing? Who is in TWW?!

I’m 15 + 5 today, 16 week midwife appointment next Thurs - at my hospital it’s normally a group appointment but they have given me an individual one for some reason (which is great!)

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SylvanianFrenemies · 30/01/2020 14:36

Thanks so much everyone, your kind words have really touched me.

Congratulations @JO138. That's great news! What a relief that must be.