Support thread for women who are pregnant or TTC after a termination for abnormalities 3

[LittlePoot]

So, New Year, New Thread. And the next set of New Babies are arriving! I hope they prove that there can be light at the end of the very dark tunnel we have all had to come through and I hope there are many more babies to come. In the meantime, we're here, as ever, with supportive words, virtual hands to hold and multiple fingers to cross to help everyone through these nerve wracking waits and scans. A more lovely group of ladies you could not wish to find. xxx

Manitz, what a time you have had. Congratulations on Sacha's arrival, and fingers crossed he is soon home and enjoying cuddles and attention from his family. Sounds like you were well looked after all the way, but it can't have helped with the stress. I hope things settle down quickly and you are all reunited at home.

Oh and well done mrsbigz on a great scan - this thread seems to attract boys!

Mrsbigz, great news on your scan, such a relief... and can't believe it's another boy for the thread!

Manitz, my heart went out to you on reading your message. Huge congratulations on the birth of your son (and LOVE the name, weirdly I said to DH last night that I really like the name Sacha, although for some reason I didn't think of it when we were thinking of names). I'm so glad he is doing well, but I can't imagine how stressful the whole experience must have been and must still be. I really hope he comes home soon so you can all settle in together.

We are fine here, Eliot is such a good baby, he's only waking once in the night now which is pretty amazing and means I feel a lot more human. Hope all the other new babies are good - and Cherry, are you due next? I'm losing track of time...

Just popping my head in to say congratulations to Babylily, Natz & Manitz. Also very pleased all is well for ghislaine.

Apologies, I keep coming on here all me, me, me. I did come here to give congratulations but as I've shared so many ups and downs with some of the original members on here I just wanted to keep you posted on where I'm at. I always seem to have such a messed up head these days, that it's difficult to go through all the posts and send personals.

I've not been around much lately as I'm going through some very hard times at the moment. Not much happening on the baby front right now. I'm on a 2 month break from the steroids so not allowed to TTC. Have a follow up appointment with the consultant in a few weeks to look into why I've not conceived yet. The break is quite timely though as my mum's cancer has spread and is now aggressive, stage 4 cancer. This has all transpired over the last month and I am to-ing and fro-ing to France at the moment to help look after her after an operation and spend some precious time with her as we don't really know what the prognosis is. The say the end is not imminent but she doesn't want Chemo anymore as she wants to ensure that she can enjoy, where possible, the time she has left. It's all very upsetting and I have no idea how I'm going to deal with TTC, possible freaking out about miscarriages or abnormal scans alongside all of this. I thought the last 4 years had been testing but I suspect that's all going to look like a picnic over the coming months/year or so! And I so wanted to give my mum a grandchild

Oh Kittens. I am so, so sorry to hear about your mum. You've been through so much, and now this. I don't know what to say, and I don't want to be trite. I just want to say that we are all with you cheering you along. You WILL get your baby. You are stronger than you know. But you don't deserve all of this. Keep talking here if it helps; stay away if all the good news makes you feel worse; whatever helps is what you need to do. Shout and scream if it helps (it doesn't though, does it). Above all it's not fair.

It's almost impossible to go from there to congratulations.... but I want to say congratulations anyway to Natz and Manitz - lovely names, and dramatic story, Manitz, glad Sacha is okay and you, too. Congratulations on good scan too, MrsBigz, and yet another boy, very odd, isn't it?

Mishtabel, Bella is a latent genius. I almost spat my drink over the keyboard when I read that she was posting in feminism.

I have been reading but my thoughts are all with Kittens.Take care. And surely, surely your luck must change soon. For now, thinking of you and your mum.

Thank you Cantdo. Hope you and Babycant are doing well. x

Kittens, I'm so sorry too. I can only echo what cant says - it seems so much for one person to bear. You will find reserves you know you didn't have. Wishing strength in the coming days to you and your mum.

I am sure too, that you will get your baby. In fact I have been thinking about what I will start to crochet for him/her when you bring your good news to this thread and it virtually explodes with joy.

Just wanted to pop in and say that my thoughts are with you Kittens, I often think of you and wonder how you're getting on, as Can't already said, you've been through SO much, and now this is just so unfair.

much love xx

Congrats to the ladies with happy baby news, well done for giving this thread more inspirational news.

Things moving along nicely here. Almost 23 weeks now, anomaly scan was all good, and looks like it's another girl bez. Absolutely delighted.

Take care x

Thanks so much for your messages.

Ghislaine, how sweet of you to be thinking of crocheting for me!

Bezzy, I'm so thrilled for you that all is going well.

oh manitiz, congratulations on the arrival of Sacha - lovely name!!! sounds like you've been on quite a rollercoaster since he was born, and i hope that you are able to take him home really soon. my ds2 was in SCBU for 4 weeks following his early arrival, and i can clearly remember the emotions that place stirred up xx

Kittens - i don't 'know' from the original group but i have read back over the posts in the past, and i just wanted to echo what the others have said. i truly hope that you get your baby soon, and i'm so sorry to hear about your mum and all of the additional stress and worry that must be bringing to you at the moment. we all find an inner strength we never knew we had when times get tough, and you will too - but you do seem have had far more than your fair share of heartache to cope with. i hope that everything works our for you xxxx

quick hello to everyone else, i will catch up with you all later xxxxxxxxxxxx

hello, just coming on quickly as am at the hospital all the time at the moment. Kitten I'm so sorry to hear your news, I hadn't realised your mum was ill and it must be devastating for it to have spread. I really hope you are able to enjoy some family time together as she wishes, she sounds pretty strong to make a decision like that. I echo ghislaine that the thread will explode when you get your baby.

sorry for a bit of me me but an update on our situation: i am feeling better today as sacha is now in scbu - couldn't sleep last night so rushed in for the six am feed to find him moved and we managed some amazing breastfeeding although he is not keen on the bottle. I am pumping like a maniac and managing 8 oz per express so feel like a human cow, just a shame he wont drink any from the bottle as i'm now thinking about going in for the 10pm, 2am and 6 am feeds but think I'll get ill as I have just got back from a 12 hour shift but i need to keep him off the nasal tube or they'll keep him in longer. I have had no probs bonding at all and hate leaving him there, equally hate not seeing my kids or being involved in their lives at the moment so really torn. Hoping consultants will consider feeding established - which it is - and let him out soon. x

sorry, congratulations bezzy on a good anomaly scan.

Manitz - Lovely to hear that you are bonding with little Sacha and managing to feed well. I can understand how hard it is splitting your time between him and your other kids. Hope he makes it home soon.

Thanks for all your lovely words everyone.

I know I'm not on this thread very often these days, but I see you are at over 800 posts now so, considering all the baby action that's going on it won't be too long before a new thread is started. Can I just remind you of my legacy? That whoever starts the next thread should list all the thread babies that have been born since the original thread came to be. So, can I suggest that all of you with little ones put your bubba's names down and then copy and paste the previous addition to your own as you go along (a bit like the TTC stats!). I think it's just lovely to have it as a sign of hope for all of us that have been though the terrible experiences we have.

Oh kittens I'm so sorry about your mum. I was just popping my head in to check babynatz and babymanitz had arrived safely (congratulations guys and such beautiful names!) and I was hoping for some good news from you so am really gutted to hear things have got worse. I wish there was something I could do. And can't has said pretty much what I mean but a lot more eloquently than I could so I'll stick with telling you I'm always thinking of you. xxx

Jacob's doing really well. Sleeping well, apart from the new teeth, and eating everything he can get his hands round. Bum shuffling and rolling rather than any more sensible form of movement, and smiling and giggling all the time. All good anyway. Hope the rest of you are well and hope Sacha gets to come home soon.

Huge congratulations Manitz and sorry to hear it's been a emotional rollercoaster to begin with. Delighted that Sacha is getting stronger though and hope he's home with you and your family very soon. Hope you're feeling ok after your CS too and getting some rest.

Kittens, So sorry to hear about your mum, it's so very sad and very hard for you all. There's nothing to say to make the journey ahead any easier but I hope you have lots of good support and love around you.

Great news about the scan MrsBigz and congratulations on a wee boy. I keep thinking I'm having a boy too but thought that with DD and was clearly wrong! Hope you feel more relaxed now after another hurdle cleared.

Hope everyone with new babies are happy and settling into the extended family routines. Grandj, how great to have such a good sleeper already!

As for me, well I'm not great. 35 weeks now and we had a house fire on Sunday. Luckily we were out at the time so everyone is fine but the kitchen is destroyed and the rest of the house smoke damaged. The whole flat needs gutting, cleaning and redecorating plus kitchen rebuilt and door and some windows replaced. So we are homeless and staying with DPs parents. It's so nice of them to put us up and they are being very accomodating and kind but it's really tough being this uncomfortable, tired etc and not having my home comforts. Not to mention living out of a suitcase, not being able to prepare for the baby, having to be polite and sociable when I feel stressed and ground down. The silver lining is eventually we will be able to move back in to a clean, restored home and the insurance will cover replacing things but urgh the timing sucks. They say anything between 3 to 8 weeks before it can be done so there's a real chance we won't be able to take our baby home when it's born. I also feel guilty about the baby as we are both stressed and preoccupied instead of being excited and looking forward to his/her arrival. Plus DD is acting up and missing her toys etc.

Anyway we are thankful it's not any worse but it's certainly taking every ounce of strength to be philosophical! :(

Shit Cherry, you poor thing! What a nightmare! Like you say, it will be nice to have it all redecorated on the insurance but it must've been pretty scary and the timing is less than ideal. Hope you are comfortable where you are, and get on with your inlaws ok.

I am in France now. Mum is on good form and we are very pleased to see each other. The hard times will be ahead, now we must enjoy the good!

Lovely to hear from Littlepoot and that Jacob is doing well.

Anyone hear anything from Numpty?

Hi Kittens - oddly just been reading the thread for the first time in ages. I'm very sorry to hear that your Mum's situation has worsened; I remember you saying that the treatment in France was good, I hope that the care she continues to get is good too and gives you confidence that the best is being done. I remember in the film of CS Lewis's life (Shadowlands?) there was a quote something along the lines of 'the pain now is part of the happiness then'; we know to cherish those moments together because we know they will come to an end. I really hope you both have some special times together, whatever the future holds.

Hello to everyone else - sorry to post and run after being away for ages but DH needs the laptop (is working on a Friday night, boo - and tomorrow, boo hiss). Congratulations too all the ladies with new bubs (am also envious of the newborn snuggles, BabyJ is a wonderful toddler but I just can't remember the newborn stage ). Cherry, I really hope things work out OK and that there actually turns out to be a silver lining behind the cloud/smoke... and Bezzy, I'm very glad to hear that things are all going fine and that miniBez will have someone to share her feminine wisdom with!

As for us, we've finally sold the flat after months of getting it ready (for less than the valuation but that seems the going rate at the mo) AND we'll be moving to a house, with bedrooms! Yes, the crazy family of 4 in a studio flat will be no more - about time . We'll be bona fide normal suburbanites, with a garden . Just hoping the deal goes through OK...

Lots of love to all ladies, new old and lurking, xx

Such wise and lovely words, as always, Numpty. Thank you . I'm glad to hear all's well with you and yours. Congratulations on the house. Bet you can't wait! Mum is doing ok for now. She gets tired quickly but we also have to consider that she's still in recovery from surgery. Like you say, I am cherishing the time I get to spend with her. Can't pretend I'm not petrified though!

Hello all!

Sorry i have been bad and not checked in for ages oops! Firstly massive congratulations to Mantiz and Natz on the arrivals os Sasha and Sienna, super news! Sorry you had a bit of a scary start anitz but so glad your little man is continuing to do well x

Kittens, i have been thinking of you - thanks so much for stopping by. I am so sorry to hear about your mum, you poor things. Glad you are staying positive though - make sure you continue to enjoy the good. Please keep stopping by to let us know how you both are doing xxxxx

Cherry so sorry to hear about the fire - how stressful for you. You are right to see the positives though, imagine how lovely it will be when your new baby moves in!

Numpty good luck with the new house it sounds fabulous. We are trying to buy a house ourselves at the moment but it's taking AGES, still waiting for the people who are buying from to find something themselves.

Kitten's idea of babies name at the start of the next thread is lovely so i will kick off........

Felix 13/08/10

Flying visit to check on everyone. Should we have our names in the new baby list too do you think? If so, it goes like this....

Katiecubs - Felix 13/08/10
LittlePoot - Jacob 02/02/11

NumptyMum - Josie 28/06/10
Katiecubs - Felix 13/08/10
LittlePoot - Jacob 02/02/11

Have put myself at top as hoping it's easier to put in date order - then Can't and Mishtabel would be up above me. Do we put people who are no longer active on the thread though? Shangrila, Linspins and Allstars come to mind.

Ooh, yes, do! It's all happy endings. The whole point is to show new people who come to this thread, frightened and those who are pregnant now but have been here a little while, just how many people have gone on to have a baby. Don't forget Catlady, Sarahmia, VivCliquot. Will have to have a think about who else, I've been absent from the thread for a while and my brain is a little addled at the moment! x

Kittens, I'm so sorry to hear the latest about your mum, and am thinking of you both. Life can sure be unfair sometimes. I'm lost for words as can't imagine how hard this must be combined with all the future TTC, tests etc. I will continue to keep you in my thoughts

Manitz, congratulations! So glad to hear Sacha is improving. Scary place the NICU, but sounds like you've coped it with it as best can be expected. Hope you get Sacha home soon. BTW, love the name, and the only Sacha I have ever known was very much a man, so definitely a boys name to me

Cherry, how terrible for you. A fire would be bad at the best of times, but when you're so close to having your baby. Here's hoping it won't be too long before it all gets sorted

Lovely scan news Bezz and MrsBigz

Numpty and Katie, good luck with your potential new moves. Busy times ahead for you both..

I'm a bit angry/sad today as my 14yr old DD went to a local festival and was beaten up by the main ring leader of those girls she was having trouble with at school. I feel so bad as it was me that encouraged her to not let them stop her doing things/going places, and said they were most likely all talk. I also told her there would be plenty of people to get assistance from if she felt threatened.
She was punched numerous times, thrown to the ground, and kicked in the stomach and back, while she lay in the mud. A heap of people around, not doing anything for ages (minutes I suppose). Prior to this, she had been begging a lady that was running one of the side shows to call for security as there were girls that were going to 'bash' her. The lady refused. Apparently there were also teens videotaping it on their phones (I've offered $100 reward to whoever forwards me the video). I'm just so, so angry and keep imagining her in that mud, being attacked, and everyone just watching.
Her main injury was a swollen bloodied nose, though she has numerous aches and pains today. I took her to the hospital to be safe, as she couldn't remember much of what happened. The police came to the hospital, and said due to the 'Young Offenders Act' the girl responsible needs three cautions before she can be charged. I'm waiting to here if she has had any prior cautions (fingers firmly crossed). And they wonder why teen violence is on the rise here. I'm really angry too, as I told my DD if anyone did carry out their threats, they would not get away with it, though it looks like she just might. I would see the parents, but (unbelievably) according to witnesses, the girls mother was there, watching, and saying how proud she was of her daughter. My DD didn't even hit back, she was just so scared and stunned. I told her I was proud to have a non-violent DD, though I must admit, I wished she had have given that girl something to be sorry for. She later had the nerve to ring my DD's phone, shouting and swearing, still threatening her - I grabbed this opportunity to give her a mouthful, but I know it would be in one ear and out the other.

Sorry to rant, I know this is so totally off topic, but I don't really post anywhere else. Its so hard with DH not home too (he doesn't know as he's in the middle of no where with no communication at least until Wesnesday). I feel better for getting it off my chest though. Thanks for listening,

Love to you all xx

Oh, Mishtabel. How upsetting for you and your DD. Don't blame yourself for encouraging her not to let them stop her doing what she wants to do. I do still think that's good advice. Otherwise they have "won" in a way. Would it be a good idea to give her a personal alarm? That way, if they start on her she can draw as much attention to the situation as possible and hopefully put them off, or perhaps have a quicker intervention. I can't believe nobody came to help. I guess other teenagers may have been scared to get involved in case they got bashed too. What a despicable mother too, encouraging her daughter to behave like that. I guess they say "the apple doesn't fall far from the tree". Her mum was probably a right cow at school too. Don't feel bad about posting here. We are your friends, even if we've not met face to face! It must be hard with your DH away too. Do you have any close adult family close by you can chat to about this?

Thanks for your thoughts too. I really appreciate all the lovely messages from everyone. I'm out here in France, just with my mum and stepdad. I Skype my OH every night and speak to my auntie (mum's sister, who is also a bit like a big sister to me too) but it's a bit isolating as I'm here to give support, not take it and sometimes I need a little for myself!