Support thread for women who are pregnant or TTC after a termination for abnormalities 3

[LittlePoot]

So, New Year, New Thread. And the next set of New Babies are arriving! I hope they prove that there can be light at the end of the very dark tunnel we have all had to come through and I hope there are many more babies to come. In the meantime, we're here, as ever, with supportive words, virtual hands to hold and multiple fingers to cross to help everyone through these nerve wracking waits and scans. A more lovely group of ladies you could not wish to find. xxx

Hello ladies x

Firstly, sorry for not popping in sooner or more regularly. As always, you're all often in my thoughts and it's nice to pop on and read that everyone appears to be doing well, either with your babies or bumps.

The news from me is that last Thursday, we had a gorgeous baby girl, Phoebe, who arrived via Caesarian at 39+3 after we discovered two days before that she was breech. Nobody had picked up on it sooner, so it ended up being a bit of a whirlwind week, but in the end, everything went brilliantly and we are completely and utterly smitten with our gorgeous dimple-cheeked little girl. :)

It will be the first anniversary of Gracie's due date on the 18th of this month and while I know it will be a day for reflection wondering about first birthdays and suchlike, I can't help but thank her for giving us Phoebe. I very much feel blessed.

Anyway, sending you all tonnes of love for you and your little ones and little-ones-to-be.

Viv xxx

Aahh, lovely news! Congratulations Viv! x

Stacks of thanks everyone for the support. I've calmed down a bit since yesterday but do feel I've lost faith a bit in the care I can expect over the next months. I am trying to not feel so pessimistic about potential problems with the baby though and just wait until Monday (easier said than done). I've also just properly realised that they've put me forward again in dates. By quite a bit so I'm even more confused now and less convinced that they even did this measurement accurately. By my dating scan at 8 weeks I should have been 12+4 yesterday but sonographer said I was 13+2 (making me 14 weeks on Monday). I wouldn't have expected another jump forward especially as they'd already put me forward at the 8 week scan. BY LMP I'd have been 12+1 yesterday. Argh..... sometimes you just get tired of going over and over and over all of this huh - and constant worrying and analysing. I will see what Monday brings.

Kittens, I'll certainly have a look at the miscarriage campaign when I get a chance, the considerations needed in the delivery of subsequent care are certainly very similar. Sorry AF has arrived but glad you can get a break from the steroids. Poor you, it's rotten feeling rotten. But hopefully it will be completely worth it in the long run. Fingers crossed.

Viv - big congratulations!

Thinking of Grandji and really hoping today went well.

Best of luck Natz, Manitiz and anyone else with upcoming scans.

Love to everyone else!

Hi everyone and thanks for the good wishes. THANK GOODNESS I can say that everything is fine. The scan was good, very thorough, all measurements right in the middle of where they should be and the hole in the heart vanished. We are so, so relieved. I hope this feeling lasts but for the first time in nearly 2 years and 4 pregnancies I actually feel happy and positive about being pregnant.

To Viv - so many congratulations on the birth of your amazing daughter. Sounds like a bit of a scary week, but everything great in the end. And what a lovely present for you just before Gracie's due date - she is definitely looking after you all.

Kittens - sorry that you got your period. Hope you are feeling ok about it, and that the break from the steroids gives you a few weeks at least of relief. I hope this doesn't sound trite, but you know you can get pregnant, so fingers crossed now for next month...

Cherry, hang in there. Early scans are notoriously unreliable with dates... or as you say maybe they measured wrong this time - either way, at least you know your baby is growing very well x

Grandj

That's fantastic news, you sound so happy, so pleased for you!

YAY!!!!!!! Grandji, so delighted for you! Have a lovely relaxing evening after all the tension. Xx

Congratulations Grandj - great news, and I hope you do feel relief and joy, too.

And many congratulations to Viv on your baby girl (didn't you say once you thought it was a boy?!), lovely name. You sound so chilled for a new mum! How is it going?

Cherry, grr and grr again to crap sonographers and rubbish treatment. FWIW, I had the consultant doing my scans in my last pregnancy. I found him much more sensitive than the sonographers had been. Could you ask if the experienced sonographer could be named to do your anomaly scan so you don't face the numpty one again?! In terms of the nuchal, I agree with Grandj - they can see already if there's a serious problem, however the baby is lying, AND if they even vaguely suspected it, they would have spent the time getting you to drink water, empty bladder etc to get baby to move. So you can be cautiously hopeful for Monday! As for the date changing, that has always puzzled me too. It seems dating isn't a very exact science, since presumably you would know if your dates were that far out unless you have v short cycles. But better to have date brought forward than back, in terms of possible problems for baby.

Kittens, boo to the period coming - I guess stopping the steroids temporarily makes it less of a blow? I do understand you feeling more at home in the mc thread atm. We are always here, though. Oh, and on the royal wedding make up, there were some real horrors, I thought (says she, who hardly wears any - ahem).
Have been thinking about what you said about treatment after termination and the parallels with mc/mmc. I agree that the code could work for both. I guess ARC do a lot of pressurising and training for sonographers, consultants, midwives etc, but more is definitely needed. I will never, ever forget the crap sonographer telling me bluntly that 'there is a very serious problem here' and then running away - leaving midwife to explain he had gone to get a consultant. All of whom were busy somewhere, so they left me crying on the bed for ages. I accept that said sonographer has crap interpersonal skills, but surely they need to be trained for this sort of thing, and running away is just about as bad as it comes. There are a few things I think should be automatic for women who have had pregnancies with abnormalities, ie free nuchal/combined testing, with fast-tracked results ALWAYS phoned through as soon as reached; early nuchal scan to ensure time for cvs if necessary; extra reassurance scan between nuchal and anomaly if cvs/amnio not taken up, etc. And terminations, like induced miscarriages, shouldnt be in a labour ward or should be in designated bereavement suite away from main area. Etc. But there are differences too (eg after termination, I feared abnormality more than a mmc, so was obsessed with risk factors and the like, whereas after a mc/mmc I can see I might have felt differently, and worried more about losing the baby in the early weeks, and for someone like you, I can see you would fear both, which makes it incredibly hard).
Bee said once that termination for abnormalities is a huge taboo, and people just want to pretend it doesn't happen, and that they would never do it, so we don't get much sympathy. I can't see Mumsnet championing our perspective for fear of upsetting pro-lifers or women who find termination for abnormalities in particular abhorrent, but would be happy to email them. ARC might do more....

Good to hear from Katerina. And good luck with the impending ttc. Does it feel less daunting after a successful pregnancy?

This is a bit of an essay, so I'm off now, just shouting a hello and hope all you pregnant ones are doing fine atm.

Hi ladies,

I posted a while back - baby Fern was born at 24 weeks on 26th November 2010. I can't believe it will soon be 6 months ago - where has the time gone?

Well, after several months of not being up to doing anything which would get me even remotely pregnant, we're now officially ntnp. We haven't really had the BIG CONVERSATION but I guess if we're ntnp then dh must feel in a similar way to me.

I'm on my 16th dpo. My cycles used to be 35 days and since Fern I had 2 which were 35 days, but the last was 28. So I'm kind of hoping for ov sometime this week. I'm not charting, not temping, but just going with the flow and keeping my fingers crossed. Oh yes, and enjoying the odd glass of wine, which I'm sure I read somewhere will help lol!!

Hope to catch up with all of you over the coming days / months. I haven't been posting in the other threads because at times it's far too hard to think of what's happened in the past 6 months. But this thread feels different, I think because it's looking to the future, so feels more positive.

x

Oh Viv, so happy to hear from you. Congratulations on your little girl - what a pretty name. I have been thinking about you, and just yesterday, went back through the threads to try to work out when you were due. On page 7, I found an entry from when you were 28 + 2, so I surmised that you either had your baby or were overdue. Great to hear everything worked out in the end - a gift from Gracie, what a lovely way to put it. Without any pressure, don't forget to drop in and update us. Also, how did you cope with your pregnancy toward the end (am always curious about this); were you anxious about something going wrong or relatively confident? Anyway, come back when you have time. Sending a big kiss to your baby girl x

Cherry, that must have been dreadful. All that build-up, only to have to wait some more! Hope the weather's nice and you can get busy out & about this weekend to pass the time (same for Natz). Bella used to sleep all through her scans (pity it didn't follow on once she was here), so definitely wouldn't worry about that.

Kittens, sounds like the steroids really knock you around. Hope they're out of your system quick smart so you at least get a couple of weeks of feeling normal. Good luck for next month. Totally understand you posting more on the MC threads at the moment. Glad you have somewhere you feel supported. And please don't worry about having to do personals etc when you pop in here - especially when under the influence of steroids. As long as you keep us up to date with what's happening with you, that's the main thing.
Re: the make-up - I do see your point. I was just thinking how simple and down to earth she (Kate) must be, and even though she looked a tad heavily made up around the eyes (or under the eyes, I should say) I thought it would come out really well in the photos. Now though, looking at the pics in the magazines, I can't help focus on the eyeliner, and wonder how much more 'polished', as you said, she may have looked if a make-up artist had done it. She's obviously a natural beauty though, and would look great without a scrap of make-up I'm sure, which is more than I can say for myself, so I'll shut up now

Grandj, that's such excellent news. What a relief for you. So do you have any more scans at all?

Katie - aww, thank you. Lovely to hear from you and hear what Felix is up to. Good luck with the job. Are you still planning to get married at the end of the year (practicing my singing)?

Katerina, good to hear from you too. I can't believe your little boy is almost one already! Hoping today passes peacefully for you xx

Hello Louzie - great to see you here. I must confess though that I have no idea what ntnp means [embarrassed] , besides, perhaps, 'Not Trying to Negate Pregnancy'? Good luck with the TTC this month. You have reminded me though.....When I was searching for info regarding Viv's due date, I came across quite a few names that made me think 'Thats right, whatever happened to so & so'. I have a memory like a sieve, so can't remember the names right now, though if anyone is around that hasn't popped in for a while, please do. Don't worry about personals or anything, Just a quick 'hi' will do

Must go and do things I should have been doing in the first place (MN is such a great procrastination tool). Love to all and a wave to all those on the sister thread xxx

Morning lovely ladies. I'm not a frequent poster, but I have been on a couple of times. I'm currently 29 weeks after two losses for babies with triploidy. Thank g-d everything has been fine this time and have been getting excellent care. But I just wanted to ask if my feelings of continued anxiety are normal. I wake up in the morning and am convinced the baby has passed in the night. If baby isn't kicking all day I get really panicky. It Is active but not a crazy baby. My dd also wasn't. She had quieter days and more active days. I have Been having horrific heartburn and cramps in my legs at night but past few nights I haven't had and now I'm worried there is something wrong! I thought my anxiety would get better with good scans and movement but I just find other things to worry about... Is this normal??!!!

Hi ladies, hope you don't mind me joining you, I have posted at odd times over the past 18 months but not recently as I honestly believed we'd never get pregnant again, well after a very long journey i've had my first BFP, since having a termination, this morning.

Very sadly we terminated our last pregnancy at 14 weeks due to T18, December 2009, unfortunately I developed Asherman's Sydndrome due to the termination, which is scarring of the uterus. I had an operation to treat the scarring in March 2010, and then after 6 months of no success we tried IVf, again with no luck, after seeking a second opinion a test last Decemeber showed some scarring remained and I had another operation in January this year, and this morning I got my BFP.

I am completely overwhelmed, and have spent most of the morning in tears on and off. I am shocked and so happy but also terrified at the same time. I just don't know how we're going to get through the next 8 weeks, till we can find out if the baby is ok. I've booked an early pregnancy scan for when I'm 7 weeks, but I know this will just tell me if the pregnancy is viable or not, and after that I will see my consultant where I guess we will discuss whether we will have a scan at 12 weeks or just go straight for a CVS.

What have most of you ladies done? The thought of going through another 12 week scan terrifies me more than having a CVS, did anyone else feel like this?

Helen x

Sarahmia - congratulations on your pregnancy and everything being good. I'm only just coming up for 14 weeks and have scary scans ahead still so I'm a bag of nerves and very anxious. I'm sure one of the other ladies will be able to give you their experience from where they are further down the line. Lots of good advice and support on here.

Helen - I remember you posting on the sister thread and the really difficult time you've had. You must be reeling at the moment but a whispered congratulations to you. I've just had a fairly awful 12 week scan as you'll see from my post down thread and have another attempt at a nuchal scan scheduled for Monday. It is terrifying but as everyone here says one tiny step at a time is the only way to get through it. Our geneticist and consultant both said to me that every pregnancy is different and we have to see how we feel at the time regarding invasive testing rather than basing a decision purely on the outcome of the last pregnancy. So I'm making no decisions now and will cross that bridge if I come to it and cross my fingers that I wont. Good luck and everyone here will hold your hand through all of this.

Louzie - good to hear from you, I wondered how you were. I'm glad you are looking forward and find this thread positive. I didn't do charting or temping either which was right for us as I felt I didnt want to control things too much. I did do OPKs for the first couple of months, mostly to make sure I was actually ovulating again and then we decided not to bother with them either and just see what happened. Best of luck and glad to see you here.

Mishta - thanks for the reassurance about the movement. It was worrying me a bit and I started consulting Dr Google. With my DD she was moving constantly and really active (still is!) and I can't really remember with my last pregnancy what the scans were like as they were all stressful and I think in some ways I've blocked the memory. But good to know its nothing to worry about.

Cant - thanks for the reassurance too. I'm booked for an anomoly scan at 18 weeks and I'm hoping that it will be done by the consultant. I will ask on Monday about that. I'd much prefer it, my experience of the consultant is hugely positive and I'd feel so much better under her care. If not, I'll say because of our history I'd really like it to be done by a very experienced sonographer at the very least. Actually in my DDs pregnancy I had a scan there as I had an ovarian cyst they wanted to monitor (still have but any concern about that has gone out of the window in light of everything else!) . And I was about 20 weeks at the time (they didnt offer anomoly scans then). The sonograher then was really horrible too, not incompetant but really cold and miserable and she snapped at us that we werent there to see the baby so shouldnt expect her to show us, in a really headmistressy kind of manner. I'm sure there are hundreds of wonderful sonographers out there but I feel perhaps I've had two of the worst examples!

Oh and I forgot to say thanks before to Katarina. I loved the one year old stage too, old enough to play and have a great personality and humour, young enough to not be contrary about every little thing! Good luck for when you start TTC again and hope your little boy has a lovely first birthday! My DD is 3 next week, time flies.

Right off to get DD ready for bed and then to collapse in front of the TV. Life feels difficult at the moment for all sorts of reasons and I'm very glad it's the weekend!

Love to all.

hi, i have to be quick and this thread is very busy so I'm worried I'll miss someone. I just want to be selfish and tell you my blood results which came back as 1 in 1700. I'm quite pleased with that but it hasn't removed the worry. Sarahmia does that answer your question?! I also had a little boy after my first termination and i found that I couldn't basically allow myself to believe i would end that pregnancy with a baby. I think it is completely normal to be concerned and to be aware of what can go wrong. I hope you aren't tying yourself up in knots about it though.

congratulations to those who have just had bfps. Especially to helenlouisey, I think I also read your story on the otherboard and it's great that ashermans can be treated. Kitten sorry you got your period, steroids sound dreadful and I hope they work soon for you. Good luck to all others who are trying. Natz have you got a scan next week? are you twenty weeks now?. Goodluck cherry. Congratulations grandj. Now dh is nagging me to go to bed so i have to run, i am really really tired at the moment as i think i have a cold. take care to all and sorry if i miseed anyone out. x

Hi Sarahmia & Helen - though I'm a bit vague on the details, I do remember both your stories, as they were both so unfortunate (as is everyone's of course but you know what mean).

Sarah, for you to have triploidy twice, it's no wonder your scared this time despite getting this far. If it helps, I was scared right until I checked in to hospital the night before my scheduled c-section.
I've said it before, but I would just suggest to acknowledge those feelings of fear, be understanding with yourself that of course you would be anxiuos after what you have been through, but realise that the fears don't actually mean anything, so let them go - until the next time they come, then do it all again. I used to actually talk myself through the fear each time. I didn't stop it, but it helped me cope. Also lurking in the normal pregnancy boards, and reading about all those normal, often trivial pregnancy worries, and of course about all the ladies going on to have their babies without problem, really helped too (oh, and I'd also hired a doppler, which I found very reassuring for those times when the baby was very quiet). Good luck, and we are all here to hold your hand whenever you need xx

And Helen, I'm so glad you have a BFP (I don't even know what that stands for, but know it means a positive test) - congratulations. I remember googling Ashermans Syndrome as I, like I think many here (?), didn't even know what it was. I can only repeat what I said to Sarah above and echo Cherry - one step at a time. It's torturous, but time will eventually pass. Again, as with Sarah above, we're here for you whenever you need xx

Hello all

Just popping in to say good luck to Cherry for tomorrow. Hope you have a much better experience this time, and fingers crossed for a great scan. Let us know how you get on when you can.

Hi Louzie - congrats on making the step to (I think??) not try not to get pregnant... and I think the occasional glass of wine and a relaxed approach sounds great. As you know, James was born just a few days before Fern. I can't believe it's nearly 6 months either. Good that we are both still here and can feel more positive now sometimes than we did then.

Welcome to Sarahmia and Helenlouisey. Sarah, I can't help with the feelings of anxiety in later pregnancy - I'm 20 weeks now, and still feeling positive after a good 20 week scan. I hope this feeling lasts, but I'm quite sure I'll have lots of wobbles in the next weeks and months. I think it's totally normal to feel scared bearing in mind what we've been through. Please come and talk here, I don't know if we can help but at least we can understand a little - I've also lost two babies to (unrelated) chromosome problems, as have some of the others.

Helenlouisey, so great to see you here after what must have been a hard time - to go through all that after losing your baby seems so unfair. Early pregnancy is so scary, and I know exactly what you mean about dreading the 12 week scan. Do you think you would want to see the baby anyway even if you do go straight to CVS? I think they would have to scan you before doing one of those too... anyway, you don't have to decide now. I know I got through the first few weeks by pretty much trying to pretend it wasn't happening. Not sure anyone would recommend that approach but I did find it made the time go more quickly. Hugs to you, I hope you are feeling a bit better x

Sorry this is just a fleeting post, we all have throat colds at the moment, lots of coughing and very little sleep!

Welcome to Sarahmia and Helenlouisey, and congratulations on your pregnancies. Sarahmia, I am 9 weeks behind you so cant help you with the anxiety, but safe to say I have been very anxious throughout this pregnancy, even with a detailed and very positive 12 week scan. Am dreading the 20 week scan. As Grandj said, I also ignored my pregnancy for pretty much the first 15 weeks, and only since feeling the baby move have I really accepted that he/she is there. I hope your anxiety lifts but it is totally understandable after a loss to feel the way you feel, and I do too.

Helenlouisey, I am so happy that you got your BFP. I hope you are feeling better today and that the shock has worn off. I too remember getting very emotional when we got our BFP, and we had only been waiting for 3 months, so I can only imagine how you must be feeling. We were offered a CVS at our 12 week scan, but our odds were so low with the combined bloods (which we were given the results of before we had left the hospital at KCH) that it seemed riskier to have a CVS than to just wait and see. As everyone else has said, no need to decide straight away. Talk with your consultant and tell him/her your fears and Im sure you will feel much clearer about it after, whatever you decide.

Cherry - good luck for tomorrow! I hope you get a decent sonographer this time... Will be jumping on tomorrow to see how you got on.

Manitz, glad to hear they were good blood results, hope you are well and relaxing into the pregnancy now.

Kittens, sorry about AF coming, fingers crossed the next month will pass quickly - even if it means going back onto the steroids x

Mishta, it's always lovely to read your posts, there is so much support and understanding. I hope you are well x

Grandj - did I say congratulations on the scan already? I lose track of where I am and when I was last on. Congratz anyway!

I have my 20 week scan on Wednesday (will be 20+6), and am feeling very nervous. Baby is very active which is lovely but I hate the thought that they could still find something wrong, even though the 12 week scan was all fine and reassuring. I've lost that warm fuzzy feeling and am waiting for the bad news. I know I should be more possitive, and I though I would be after the 12 week scan which is when Cara's problems were detected.

Sorry I have not said hello to everyone, so hello to all that I missed out , am off to make a hot honey and lemon drink then sneaking off to bed xx

Natz, your fleeting post is quite long in the end! Just wanted to send you some reassurance about the anomaly scan. Turners tends to show up at the nuchal scan I think. I know that doesn't help because you can imagine all sorts. And I found the anomaly scan almost intolerable. But we will all be with you silently cheering you on and as you know, odds on all will be just fine. Will you find out the sex as well?

Cherry, good luck to you too for tomorrow - hope it is quick and passes smoothly. Oh and about the baby moving - Babycant was a massive wriggler at the 12 week scan, but LittleMissCant was relatively stationary. Which pans out as she is now the sort of child who likes to sit and read rather than run everywhere manically.

Manitz, great results, and hope you can pause the worry button for a while. Understand entirely why you might not as you too have been through the hell twice. You have probably, as I did, developed coping mechanisms for that too.

Sarahmia, I went through 2 fatal abnormalities too, and so get where you are coming from. I think you just have to take one day at a time, and find ways to cope with the fear, because it doesn't go away - though I did find it faded slightly as time passed. I got somewhat obsessed with stillbirth, and found I had to hide stories about stillbirth. Anyway congratulations on getting to 29 weeks, and keep talking here if it helps.

Grandj, hope you are still feeling positive after the scan. I know you've been through it all twice, too (odd, isn't it, that you, me, Manitz, Sarahmia, as well as Kittens, Bee, Linspins, Shangrila) have all been through it twice, despite each time being assured the conditions were unrelated? Anyway I digress. Just to say I think it's even harder when you've had things go wrong twice. And it's great that it's working out this time.

Louzie, hi again and good luck with the ttc. You sound different, somehow, so I guess you have moved on in some way.

Helenlouisey, I hope you are coming to terms with the bfp. A head-in-sand approach is how I got through the first trimester. I don't think you should decide now about a CVS - wait and see what your combined results are - and also, try to have the nuchal early (ie as early as possible) so you have time for a CVS if you need one. But hopefully, you won't.

Kittens, hope you're okay. And Mimsy, if you're reading, big hug.

Mishtabel, you are like the thread chronicler! you are so good at remembering where people are at. Big hug to beautiful Bella. Does she run everywhere these days?

Hi everyone,

Can't - it's interesting that I sound different. I think I am different - I guess we all are? I'm coping now with looking to the future. If I think too hard about what's happened it's too difficult. So, I feel a bit guilty about looking forward, but it's the only way to be.

Mishtabel (I think it was you who asked lol) - ntnp is 'not trying, not preventing'.

My cycles have been a bit all over the place. A few months after Fern was born I went straight into a 35 day cycle, then another, then the last was 28. So, I'm really guessing about ov, but it should have been some time this past week - only time will tell. I feel sure now that I would like to be pg again and it's nice to make that decision.

I will spend a bit of time reading the thread this week, and catch up on some personals, but for now waves to everyone!!

Just quickly as I'm at work and there's been loads to catch up on:
Congratulations Viv! So pleased to hear you safely have baby Phoebe in your arms now, I hope you have a speedy recovery from your CS and get to relax and enjoy her company .

So good to hear from Saramia and Helenlouisy, I remember you both from previous posts on here and on the other thread and I'm really pleased to hear that you are both pregnant, even if I can also relate to the anxiety that brings. Hoping you get through the next weeks safely. Helen - from my experience, the NHS where I am gave a lot of support during my early weeks of pregnancy BUT that was all from the fetal medicine team. Sounds like you've already got initial scan/chat with consultant booked so hopefully that will give you reassurance; after getting those appointments I found the only thing you can do is take it a day at a time and try and distract yourself from looking too far ahead. It came as something of a shock after our 18wk scan to think we might have a baby - and now she's 10.5 months old! Sarah, re the movement issue I remember someone (Shangrila?) recommending drinking a glass of cold water to prompt baby to move, if I was nervous. I think you can also hire heart monitors (Mishtabel, did you do this?? - oh, just read your reply and you did!) to scan yourself, if that helps. But then if you don't get the right place and can't find a heartbeat that might make the anxiety worse... .

Grandj - so good that you can relax more now .

Cherry - I'm sorry to hear about your horrid scan experience and rubbish sonographers in general; I really hope you get a positive scan experience with someone who has better communication/support skills next time. Is that today? (somewhat got lost with all the posts on here since I last visited!). If so, GOOD LUCK.

Oh gosh, got a bit lost with where everyone's at and feel a bit bad to miss anyone out, but I do lurk and try to keep up when I can... xx to all,
NM

Cant - Im rubbish at doing short posts! Ah well, I typed really fast so felt like a short post till I checked it this morning. Oops!

This one is a short post, just popping on to wish Cherry luck and say a very quick hello to everyone before I have to pick the kids up from pre-school. My eldest felt the baby move today which was fantastic! Even when baby kicked her really hard in the face , had her is fits of giggles. Youngest DD didn't want to feel baby though.

Up until 2 days ago, all the kicks were just by my pubic bone, but now they are higher. Scan in 2 days - wheee! Actually really excited now! I know Turners is more likely to picked up from the NT scan, but without it we wouldn't have found the heart defect, which a lot of people said they were surprised it was picked up so early, and that is what has made me so nervous. But today am feeling really possitive.

Argh - longish post again! Will pop on later, waves to everyone xx

Hello all and thanks for thinking of me today. Well it was a somewhat similar experience. Different sonographers but same old nonsense about lack of bloody blue notes. Todays sonographers knew nothing about the fact we'd had an initial attempt last week so had to go through the whole explanation of it all again. Then got sent back out to waiting room (DP's face was like thunder) to wait whilst they saw the Department Sister to get the consent forms they said had to be signed before they would do the scan. I understand the need to have consent forms signed but why was this not done (or mentioned) last week?! It also transpired that the sonographer last week had recorded the gestation at 13+2 when it should have been 13+3 based upon the crown rump length. Which meant that today I was 14+1, the very last day they could do it.

Sat in the waiting room thinking that these scans and process was supposed to provide some reassurance but instead had actually just made the whole experience even more stressful and upsetting. Then thankfully, the fetal medicine midwife who had taken us through all the testing etc in the last pregnancy, who knew our history and remembered us, came and took us into a private room and spent ages talking us through everything and just generally being fantastic. She even managed to get me made up - drumroll............. some blue notes!!!

Went back in, the sonographer did the scan and the NT was recorded as 2.2mm which they said was in the normal range for that gestation. Have to wait until next Monday/Tuesday to get blood results but thankfully the wonderful fetal medicine midwife told me to call her directly so I can get them then rather than wait the usual 2 weeks.

The icing on the cake was when the sonographer told me I'd get an appointment by letter for 20 week scan. Told her I had one booked for 17th June already to which she replied, "well its not on the system". Told her I'd just had this reconfirmed by fetal medicine midwife not more than 20 mins previously. She went off to check, came back and said it was booked for 17th June but because it had been booked by the consultant it hadnt been put on the sonographers system so they didnt know.

Arghhh!!!! why dont they have a central system???! These people work in the same department next to each other yet the communication is just dire. I'm sure it's a fault with the system rather than the individual but I just hope this isnt the experience of all people who come into the process via a different route due to a bad previous experience and loss. Actually at one point I thought it must be my fault and I'd wandered into fawlty towers instead of the hospital by mistake....

Anyway sorry for the waffle, sure I've bored everyone to death! The good news is that the baby has a 'normal range' NT, I now have my own holy grail of blue notes and can get the results a week earlier than normal thanks to the wonderful FM midwife. Of course worried sick about blood results but at least this hurdle is over today.

Sorry for lack of personals today but a quick big good luck to Natz for the anomoly scan this week and hope everyone else is doing well. Love to all x

Hi Cherry - great news that everything looks good with the baby, even if the experience was terrible again. I have to say that my own experiences at my previous hospital were just as bad - sadly, it seems that some hospitals are just very, very bad at patient care, which is annoying at best for most people, but only helps make a very scary and difficult time much worse for us.

So glad the nuchal measurement was good - 2.2mm is exactly the same as I had with this baby, at an earlier gestation (12.5 I think) and came up as about 1.3 MoM (i.e. just above average) so at your baby's age should be even better than that. Hope that makes sense! Good luck for next week with the bloods - Manitz, I think I forgot to say congrats on your great full results, such good ones particularly given your history.

And good luck to Natz for Wednesday. It's great that you are feeling so positive, and lovely that your DD felt the baby. My DD has zero patience, puts her hand on the bump and says straight away "yes mummy I can feel it" just so she can run away and doesn't have to wait...

good luck for your scan natz. Cherry it is totally astonishing how bureaucratic this all is but i have had similar frustrations with previous pregnancies and also with both terminations. was turned away from my first termination because of bad communications between my hospital and the one which did the injection so had to go back 2 days later. Though it sounds like your hospital is particularly bad as nuchal is a fairly standard procedure. thankfully it sounds like you have a really excellent midwife on your side. Good results so far fingers xd for a good lot of full results. xx

Cherry, wonderful news with your scan - obviously not the incompetence of the communication system [grr] but the actual scan result itself. Our NT measurement was 2.5 at 13+4 weeks so 2.2 is a good measurement for 14+1. I still dont understand the whole PAPP-A and MoM measurements though?

Im sorry if I sound thick, but what are these mysterious blue notes? I had nothing but an appointment letter when I went for my 12 week scan. I cant believe how much trouble they caused....! Im really glad the FM Midwife has been so helpful, and how lovely of her to make herself available to give you the results earlier. Here's hoping the wait goes quickly.

It would appear that after a proper nights sleep last night, the enthusiasm and excitement for tomorrow has completely disappeared! I have once again turned into the big green monster who snaps at anything that moves. After giving my DD's the third degree for fighting over a chair, I decided I needed to step out of the house and distract myself on this gorgeous day. So after dropping the eldest DD to pre-school, I took the youngest DD out for some retail therepy (it may have been mainly pound land, but it had the desired effect, and my garden is now FULL of tacky gnomes, frogs and fairy ornaments), then collected DD1 from pre-school and treated them to a picnic styled park trip. We are all friends again and they accepted my apology for being a big grumpy knickers today.

Sorry for long ranting post yet again, am hoping to be back on here tomorrow a new woman and letting you know if we are having a pink or blue one.... (we never found out the sex with our DD's, so this is a new experience for me) xxx

Hi everybody, I hate to post and run but I just logged on to say that I am very happy for the good scan news and blood results, and to wish Natz good luck for tomorrow! And of course, massive congratulations to Viv!

I have to dash tonight, but I'm still lurking and thinking of you all. Big wave as well, if you're reading, to Mimsy, Catlady and Drama, I hope you're all ok.