Pissed off at DH making breakfast

I haven't told her to eat any way.
I have said it's likely that it will.
Perhaps you'd like to read something correctly before you jump on it!
It's a known fact that protein keeps you fuller longer than carbs! And is in fact far better for your body to process, unused carbs turn to fat.

I agree. OP take no notice of weirdo food advice from some of these posters.

If he wanted to do something nice he could have put the kettle on and started the toast for the OP. Cooking a big fry-up when you know someone is avoiding fried food is not doing something nice.

I agree. Do people actually still 'fry' a breakfast like this as well? I literally never fry anything in oil. Grill. Airfry. Poach the egg.

One fry-up is not going to kill you. The colleague that died either had other long-term health issues (that you may not have been aware of) or was eating more unhealthily than one fry-up.

Go for another walk. A brisk one, of course.

Well done for your weight loss.

I have got my BMI down from 30.2 to 25.1 since February. I know if my wife had been trying to feed me stuff like that I’d have been pissed off too.

Have you actually read the OP?

I would suggest some alternatives you can enjoy together
Fry up isn't off the menu -grilled low fat sausage, lean bacon, poached eggs and tomatoes\ bacons with no toast? If you're pre diabetic that would definitely be better than bananas on toast tbh.

Snacks - nuts and seeds instead of crisps ? Sliced apple with peanut butter ?

He clearly wants to show his love by bringing you food but sounds like he needs a little educating.

I did a food diary to lose weight for a while and to be honest it made me a bit obsessed with food (I did lose the weight though... and kept it off). I would have been annoyed too if my partner was dangling high calorie snacks in front of me while I was doing it.

I know that some people would be offering the high cal stuff to wind their partner up but like others said it could be because he’s so used to eating like that and he doesn’t know what it’s like for you right now.

so I don’t blame you for being irritated. Well done on the progress too.

I think it was a nice gesture, and fried eggs are fine - eggs don't absorb fat, so just make sure the fat is drained off and there isn't an issue. Bacon isn't good for you full stop, but egg and bacon would not be worse than banana on toast. Sausages, no.

If it's not too late, tell him thanks, say you're struggling, and ask him to do you eggs, grilled tomatoes and grilled mushrooms next time, or get an air fryer where you get the fried effect with much less fat.

Fwiw, up the number of veg you eat, up your fibre via whole grains, particularly quinoa and barley, add lentils to everything - dahl made with onions and red lentils with a dollop of yoghurt (not the low fat stuff, that's ultra processed. You need some fat in your diet so ordinary plain yoghurt is fine) is delicious. Lots of beans - add to stews and soups. All of this fills you up, keeps you fit, gets the weight off and keeps it off.

Good luck, and try to get your partner on board.

Bmi 31 is not morbidly obese.

Op has a diet that works for he

She wants support and should not need to adjusting her diet to suit others

Carbs are not evil
Some bodies can't handle them well - insulin spikes - especially bodies that have been damaged by people eating badly

Sausage and bacon are not good quality proteins they are ultra processed food which seems to be strongly linked with obesity as well as cancer

And whatever - no one has the right to try to force what you eat

Her DH caused that not the op.

He's trying to keep you fat @SecretEater23 Some men do this. Don't want their woman slimming down, and being more attractive/gaining admiration and attention from other men.

And yes men DO fancy women who are slimmer/athletic/curvy rather than fat. People can come on and say 'I am 16 stone and I get plenty of attention from men!' But overall, men are attracted to women who aren't 5 stone (or more) overweight!

is he overweight?

my dh also loves cakes and biscuits
always asking me to buy them in the shops

will power is put to its limit!

of course he isnt trying to keep you fat op

@@SecretEater23

the cooked breakfast would have been better for you. Just give him the fried bread.

toast & banana is loads of carbs that turn to sugar as soon as you eat them.

semantics aside, you need to talk to him when you're both less angry.

Explain why YOU are doing this, remind him he doesn't need to if he doesn't want to, but that you're struggling to stick to it when he's constantly offering you things you'd like, but are trying not to eat/drink & to please stop.

on the other hand, our culture/habits revolve around food & drink & it's not much fun being the partner that has lost their 'fun' partner that wants to share a drink/snack.

I'm the no longer 'fun' partner & friend. It's hard in the U.K. to be sociable & fun when you eat a restricted diet.

just talk to him at a good time & try to be the one to suggest things to do together that don't revolve around food or do things like get the drinks - bring him a wine/beer & yourself a soda water...

Have you actually sat your husband down and told him not only that you want to loose weight, but why? Have you told him how scared the death of your colleague has made you, how you felt at their funeral (not only that they died so young but also - I presume - that the heart attack was down to weight / diet / lifestyle)? I think having an open conversation about this would be really helpful if not.

I actually think he probably really does think he was just being nice - our perceptions of what is a normal weight are massively skewed now and with a BMI of 31 you probably look very ‘average’ compared to the rest of the population, so he may not necessarily understand your desire and motivation to loose weight.

Massive well done on the weight loss so far.

This is it exactly. My brother was the same with my sister in law, he couldn't handle her losing weight and potentially being attractive to other men. He used to call her fat, but that's just how he preferred things.

@Soontobe60

Scientists don't just study two people. Anecdote isn't data.

i am glad you have had a chat op.

Well done OP you have inspired me! Had a baby 1 month ago and I am scared to weigh myself!

Diet planning and healthy living starts tomorrow. Though I may never have the will power to throw out a fry up 😬

I think your DH is being an unsupportive jerk. Maybe sit him down and tell him how it makes you feel and you want his support. Benefit of the doubt if he’s never struggled with weight then he simply doesn’t get it.

I can completely relate OP as I've had similar struggles but there's way to adapt to your new way of life. I'd maybe apologise for shouting and explain how it came from feeling unsupported. But maybe propose ways you can still enjoy good together e.g instead of frying to grill the meat and poach/boil eggs instead of fry, popcorn instead of crisps for movie night and low cal options alcohol in moderation.
Also your husband may not realise the extent your colleagues death has affected you, maybe have a bigger conversation and he may understand better and show more support.
But we'll done on your efforts so far you're doing great

He comes across as a feeder