to want to bag up my children and dump them in the river?

[Greensleeves]

they have had a lovely day today - a friend over all day, a water fight with water bombs and water pistols followed by fluffy dressing gowns and hot pizza, played on the Wii with their friend, then watched the world cup and had treats (choc chip muffins and pringles ) to munch during the game

for some reason they have behaved atrociously for the past hour and a half

ds1 was so rude and disrespectful we told him he needed to be quiet so we could watch the football, or take himself off to bed - several warnings

he snarled "Oh FINE I'm off to bed then" to which we replied "Night then, don't forget to brush your teeth"

when he realised we weren't going to invite him back down again he threw an enormous screaming tantrum and unrolled all the toilet rolls down the stairs

ds2 then went to bed and jumped on the top bunk (which he has been warned about endlessly) and has broken it, so he is sleeping on the floor

they are both crying and wailing and ds1 is still being rude as well

ds2 is supposed to be going on a jud course tomorrow morning, neither of us want to bloody well get up early and take him now

I am upset and furious

and dh is ashen and silent again, I know he feels rotten because he lost it and screamed at them when he saw the toilet rolls

we are shit parents, aren;t we?

Have a double, should help with the screamin' good looks, Goblin.

Yep. Very very dull, G.S. So dull, in fact, that Rollmops keeps coming back to talk about how dull it is.

Sounds like a challenge to me. What interesting thread titles have you got hidden up your sleeve?

what strange posts, rollmops
sounds like you fancy yourself as some kind of dorothy parker, but forgot to be funny or clever

Can I just say, I'm not with rollmops on this, but I've seen her around (and him) and she (and he) seem like jolly good sorts.

Let us all forgive ourselves and each other.

Amen.

yes don't flatter me kooks, there is no need

how odd this is

Greeny quite a few people minded the title, it wasn't the weirdest thing in the world to mind the title. I'm worse than you, I have made dreadful comedy threats to my children, but you know, it's not necessarily pointless and facile to question things.

I know several people didn't like the title

EmmaBemma for example who managed to dislike it without being aggressive, insulting or downright strange

rollmops' objections appear to be to me rather than to my thread title

I have snorted wine on dh's new ipad or whatever the thing is called.

Of course, I once got in trouble on MN for telling my toddler not to run off in the park as a lion might eat her. That I blame on Hilaire Belloc though.

Now, I better get a cloth...

SavoyThere was a boy whose name was Jim...
My Godchilren love these tales.
And the gorier the better.

well i have now found something i can agree with rollmops on
i don't give a stuff about the title but there is plenty to object to about YOU greeny

the bag option is looking quite agreeable here as my toddler has already weed all over the floor twice today
a bag would contain the worst of the mess i think

sorry it's infuriated you vegas, that wasn't the intention but i do sometimes find dark humour is a release from the stresses we all have in life
i am sure we all have heard of cases where people really have had awful things happen to them, but it might not mean that we feel jokes about it are off limits
to me, making a joke ABOUT a real life baby who was put in a bag, would not be funny, but i wasn't talking about that
i think the title is just ludicrous hyperbole as i said and that is why i find it amusing - if greeny had said something more realistic and less surreal (eg "to want to punch my children and break their legs" then i personally would not have found it funny

Surely there's a difference between joking that we feel like doing something and making a joke about something that actually happened? Sometimes I feel like throttling DH, doesn't mean I'd laugh at a real life strangling case

There is someone here in AIBU who has posted 'AIBU to want to kill my dog?' nobody has complained about her thread title. Talk about double standards!

Bloody hell, did everyone have a rough weekend or something? I've never seen such silliness over a relatively innocuous thread title.

She didn't even say cunt!

I did the other day, my thread was pulled!
I'm so proud! apparently I'm juvenile and unoriginal.. Which is exactly the look I was going for!

Greeny you are doing well son!

My standard joke IRL (when either of the DC has been unbearable, obviously)is to tell friends/fam that:

'we are on the verge of putting them on the pavement... I was going to charge a tenner, now I think I'll just stick a Going Free sign in there'

My point is not that it's particularly funny, just that most people 'get' dark humour as a harmless way to diffuse tension when we're sick to the back teeth of our kids!

Sense of humour failure, anyone?