to leave DS alone in house while we go to pub?

[LordVolAuVent]

Let me explain...

We are going on holiday with my parents and brother. We go every year and usually we camp but this year we're getting a house because DS 15months a bit young for camping (bad sleeper and noisy!). It's a tiny little village, v quiet, no crime ever as far as I know. The house has a garden, with a gate that leads onto road behind, where there is a pub.

Today my mum suggested that one night we could all go out together for a meal/drinks at the pub as it's so close we could take the baby monitor. The way things are positioned, it would be just like sitting out in the house garden, if the garden was a bit longer iyswim!

I'm not sure how I feel about this. She really sees no problem in it, we would obviously lock up the house, it would take barely a minute to get back if he woke (which he rarely does at that time), and anything untoward would be heard over the baby monitor. This all makes sense but a little thing in my mind is a bit [unsure emoticon]... I'm sure other nights we will stay in/BBQ, they will babysit so me and DH can go out, and we will stay in when they go out, but it would be nice to all go just one night.

It's not a big deal at all, she isn't going to get pissy or anything if we don't do it, but just wondering would you do it? Judge away

"do you really think what LVAV is proposing is the same as the mccann scenario?"

It's not that different is it!

I agree with redredwine the posters who are saying bad things happening are rare, well so are car crashes my mum has been driving 30 years and never crashed once, my dad 40 years and never crashed once, that does not mean that because the risk is low I don't put my dc in car seats, if possible I eliminate risks especially if it is as easy as don't go to the pub.

isnt it illegal? i mean to leave a child that young home alone?

I wouldn't. And I"m not stupid. What's so much better about sitting in a pub forking over XXX for a drink, instead of getting drinks in (at a price of X) and having everyone round to yours?

Especially if the difference is only a few metres...

LadyintheRadiator, your name has betrayed the truth... You ARE in fact a woman physically chained to the radiator, aren't you?

I wouldn't feel comfortable doing it, but will now go back and see how this has exploded.

I wouldn't do it. Never rely on technology, it always breaks down!

The OP has said, repeatedly, that this was just a suggestion made by her mother. She has also said that as she didn't feel that comfortable with the concept in the first place, she is not in fact going to do it.
Yet still the ullulating bucketheads carry on.
TBH one of the reasons that screaming, pants-filling outrage over elf-and-safety issues is such a stupidity indicator is that the screamers are not driven by logic or risk assessment at all. It's magical thinking, superstition, that's going on here.
These people have a horror of parental 'selfishness' which they interpret as doing anything enjoyable or anything which is convenient - things which involve parental inconvenience and suffering are much 'better' because this is about propitiating some sort of imaginary being. The hostility directed at those who see this nonsense for what it is comes from either the fear that the imaginary being will be so angry at not being feared that it will strike everyone's children with blights and plagues, or there is in fact no imaginary being, and all the inconvenience and fear and stress these silly sods have put themselves through has all been for nothing.

I wouldn't risk it, could you go to the pub for lunch or early evening meal with your DS.

The only hostility I can see is from the people who think this is ok, actually.

No need to resort to name calling just because people wouldn't fancy leaving a baby locked alone in a house SGB.

'(or if a busybody reported them to the local police having seen them in the pub with a baby monitor - like I would)'

You'd do this? Seriously? Jeez.

Found this reply from Mumtofour on another thread (leaving-baby-in-a-car-whilst-you-pay-for-petrol thread) it sums up my attitude to the question the OP poses;

"I think you should follow you instincts as there is no right or wrong answer to this. In life there are always possibilities that something can go wrong but our minds can also make these possibilities a huge stress when the chances are slim. If it stresses you then i would say take him with you as ultimately it is your decision and could you live with yourself if something did happen? You sound a fab caring mum and i am sure you know deep in yourself whats best."

Personally my response would be a massive "no". For all the reasons that have been mentioned previously - but mainly fear of fire. If you're in the garden you could smell it/ see smoke & stand a chance of doing something about it - not if you're in the pub.

Riven & SGB, stuff does happen - you can pooh-pooh it all you like & make out anyone who doesn't feel right about leaving their kids alone is a hysterical martyr but it's up to the individual parent how they feel about risk factors. I bet you put seat belts on your kids don't you? Magical thinking? superstition? I don't think so.

I don't get it...over 240 posts, OP has said she won't do it, only 5 or so people said 'I would consider it' and yet the hysteria continues

You see hysteria, I see debate. It's an interesting moral dilemma above and beyond the OP's individual "should I, shouldn't I" question. If you don't want to read it - don't look. Doh.

Legally, there appears to be no definitive answer, however

this gives guidance and does say that babies, toddlers and youg children should not be left alone even for a few minutes. There may be some 'discussion' as to exactly what that means, for example, should you leave them alone whilst you hang out the washing etc? For me, I would take it that leaving alone means not being on the property, ie: the doors and windows are closed and locked, rather than you being in the garden.

At the end of the day, it is up to the person concerned whether they want to take that risk, however small. Personally, my kids were too precious to knowingly take that chance, so we always got babysitters or included the children in our evening out.

SGB I know it is your life's work to try and be as insulting as you possibly can be, and im sorry to dissapoint you but ive had children BEFORE and after Madeleine Mcann was abducted and im going to shock you here- ive been out and left my kids at home but I guess leaving them with another responsible adult makes me a neurotic harpie

Yes and to me (and many others) common sense means not leaving kids in the house alone. But that apparently warrants being branded hysterical/wailing/silly sods according to some again because I likes it

Yes, my 1st thought was about the McCanns as well. Is it REALLY worth it & personally I wouldn't feel relaxed enough to actually enjoy the evening anyway.

Do we all have babies these day's to leave them at home alone to go the pub?

When did this happen?

OP answer to your question NO i would NOT do it.

I know a woman who left her little boy(three I think) in her house whilst she went to the neighbours, when she got back her house was on fire and she was too late to save her son. She could hear his screams but wasn't allowed back in.