young mum prejudice

[SweetMuff]

hi i am new to this site!!
just wondered if anyone else feels the same about being treated bad because your a young mum? it really gets my goat.
ok im 22 with 3 dc under4. BUT -
they were all planned
they all have the same dad
we own our house
i work and my partner works
we dont claim benefits, except cb, which correct me if im wrong, everyone is entitled to
and last but not least i am a bloody good mum!

so why all the patronising comments and filthy looks????????
my dc are never seen looking dirty, scruffy and are wel behaved and have good manners (apart from the baby obv).

AIBU?

No idea.
But may I suggest a namechange? Sweetmuff indeed [catsbum]

Obviously you are the exception to the 'stereotypical' young mum. I tend to think of it as the girls at school getting pregnant (and there were a lot, my school was widely known for its horrific teen pregnancy rate), by accident, thinking "oh it will never happen to me" or there are the ones who do for the benefits and council home, they may be few and far between but it does happen. Its this type of young mum that gives all a bad name.

I was a teenage pregnancy and my mum fucked off after a few years because she hated me etc, I runined her life (like I had any choice or say in being conceived and born). Because of this experience I suppose I am a bit about younger mums. And I don't want a flaming. This is my opinion based on my experience which has had a massive massive impact on my life and the person that I am. I wouldn't have half of my insecurities if the first 4 years of my life had happened differently, which is solely down to my 'mother.'

whats wrong with my name? and if u have no idea about the issue why post just to slate my name?? BEAUSE IM A YOUNG MUM BY ANY CHANCE U THINK U CAN INTIMIDATE ME?

Lets hope the cats bum sits on you!

Riiiiight
Have a love, it might calm you down.

Detective i can understand why you feel this way about your mum, but why tar everone with the same brush? if your mum had been older would u have the same association with older mums? just wondered.

who is giving you patronising comments, and what are they?

Who is giving you filthy looks?

No one should have to put up with being treated badly, but wondered what you actually mean?

Sweetmuff, you strike me as the kind I should avert my eyes from if I am ever out at night.
'You lookin at me???? You lookin gat MEEEEEE??'
No love I'm not. Calm down ffs. DOn't you have a bridge that needs attending to?

exactly this is perfect behaviour which backs up my argument. trying to patronise me 'love'. im not a 5 yr old.

I think you may have answered your own question,your attitude stinks.HurleySatOnMe politely pointed out your user name had other conotations and you let rip.

Well you do spell/punctuate like one.

Nono not a 5 year old. 12 perhaps?
If not, do grow up.

My mum had 3 kids before she was around 23/24. This was back in the early 70's. She says she got lots of comments usually along the line that she must be the baby sitter. Young people have been having kids for eons, as have older people. No one can win.

you just need to grin and bear it and come up with a few smart replies if anyone says anything directly to you. Sod other people's opinions, you know you're not some feckless youngster.

and by smart replies I don't mean aggression and shouting, that will do you no favours. Be smart about it.

ginger it happens all the time. will be chatting with mums in playground when they will be talking about food etc, and i will get the 'oh can you cook?' comment.
filthy looks when i first had my dd i was 17 and people would go out of their way to give me filthy looks and the midwife even said to me 'i am guessing she was a mistake, how are you coping?'

im not trying to upset anyone, just wondered why hurley felt the need to comment if she had no ide in relation to the op and then slated my name!!

Do you genuinely not know what a muff is? And that your name sounds like one of the people who send letter about their 'experiences' into Readers wives?

Because that is why people are not taking you seriously on here, not because you are a young mother.

yes of course i no its has other connotations, just as fanjo does. but dueling is not being slated.

Duelling is not a first time poster with an aggressive nature posting contentious things with a bad attitude though is she?

Would you like some vinegar for the huge chip on your shoulder OP?

Seriously, you seem ready for a fight. I was a young mum too and had my first DS at 17, and I understand how you feel, but there are better ways of explaining yourself rather than sounding like a stroppy teenager.

Fanjo is a commonly used piece of language on here, and in that particular username, is not being done in a sexually provocative manner.

If I posted with the username 'tighthotvag', or 'greatlover' then I think people would pass comment.

Looks a bit attention seeking and detracts from what you are trying to say.

I had my first Dc at 16 and haven't had half the things happen to me that you claim to have.

You do come across as very aggresive....

"Detective i can understand why you feel this way about your mum, but why tar everone with the same brush? if your mum had been older would u have the same association with older mums? just wondered."

Because I can't get over what happened and I won't change my opinion on it. I have a negative view because of a negative experience.

And I did point out that there are exceptions, like yourself. You aren't really helping yourself with your posting style though.

No self-respecting 22 year old would use the expression 'gets my goat'.

Run along now tedious troll

Being a good mum is not about age, my god daughter was 18 when she had her son, and she is a fantastic mother. Her mother, however leaves a lot to be desired.

It is about maturity, which I am afraid to say, your posts don't show!