To be shocked by the nasty bullying style of some of the threads on MN.

[Dismayed]

Having just read the thread about whether or not we should be ok about male nusery workers taking DDs to the toilet I have to say I am completely shocked at the aggressive, bullying comments that the poor OP received. FWIW I agree that we should not discriminate against males working in childcare but think that a lot of the battering comments were frankly out of order! As I read the thread I had that sick feeling that I recognised from my schooldays when I witnessed someone being bullied! I'm new to MN and have found a lot of the info and threads helpful but am so disappointed that, instead of finding a source that I had hoped would be non-judgemental and supportive, I have just connected myself to more of that cynical nastiness that I am so fed-up with on fb and in the media!

Ob, I was not blaming you per se. But if SOME people read a thread and see 10 "fuck you" posts they are more likely to post the same. I think so anyway

Or should that be Moooooooooooooooo?

Oh bugger, I read that thread before it all kicked off, and now I've missed it.

Excellent suggestion for fisticuffs section, I second that, chickens

"I can't stand people who post on AIBU then throw a hissy fit when no one agrees with them and ask for threads to be deleted. No bloody backbone."

kittywise, LMH wasn't objecting to people disagreeing with her on her lunchbox/shrunk polo/wrong colour shoes thread. She was objecting to a number of other posters who were being particularly vicious to her. There were some posters who were able to take issue with her position without descending into cruel jibes. I think this is what this thread's OP means, also.

AIBU should not be used as an excuse for bullying - which is exactly what was being done on LMH's thread. You might not have been the worst offender, kittywise, but you didn't exactly cover yourself in glory either. What is worse is that one of the nastiest comments from a post that was deleted even before whole thread bit the dust was repeated here by the person who said it in the first place.

I enjoy a good argument debate as much as the next MNer but I despise what can sometimes happen. Even in AIBU, people can be looking (sometimes at least) for help, support and, in a manner of speaking, guidance. Bitchiness, ridicule and name calling is uncalled for, no matter how strongly you disagree with someone.

Anyways I was kittywise but am bored with it now

Damn I've blown my cover

porca, maybe it is the opposite. If I see 10 f* you posts I don't post at all. I can't be bothered to deal with people that are unable to have a proper dialogue.

Do you know what baffles me about this thread?

It's WombFrootShoot. She claims to have disagreed with me in the past to the extent she was deleted.

I FIND THIS ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE TO BELIEVE, EVEN IF SHE HAD BEEN DRINKING TO EXCESS.

It does not compute. I am consistently charming, right thinking and - yes - modest. Nobody has ever disagreed with me on anything.

WFS, can you give me a clue?

Catinthehat, I disagree

thesecondcoming, why can you not just leave LMH alone?

You disagree with her. That much is clear as crystal. To go beyond that so far as you have done makes look like a witch hunt. Part of the problem on that thread, as on others that go the same way, is that the bullies make it next to impossible for anyone to have a constructive dialogue about the issue(s) which might, sometimes, allow the OP to reflect and change their own view, if that's appropriate. If you actually do suspect an OP of making stuff up, there are kinder and more effective ways of drawing it out than you have used.

Runaway, put the gin down love, it's not helping

How dare you ,I have not touched a drop.

OK, OK, half a bottle isn't a drop I agree.

Cat-

I too was deeply troubled that I could have disagreed with such an ICON of MN as you.

So I went back to my old username and had a look and I think I must have been experiencing some kind of spooky automatic writing. Yes that must be it. It was GHOSTS what made me do it.

Ghosts.

woh please leave off the second one coming.

I stated I thought LMH was BU in the other thread over some issues but not the food in nursery where she has my full support.

I mentioned she should pick her battles as she has lots and thats all TSC did and mentioned she was OTT.

Mshighwater you could call the fact you bring up TSC comment every other post a witch hunt too.

Yes some people are 'blunt' but I agree if you wanna know AIBU then you need to ccept you may just be. If you post AIBU expecting everyone to cry NO your not then you will get upset when they do.

Simple

You post a controversial topic so exepect a bit of a bashing heated debate imo. Not everyone will agree with you and will have strong opinions to and for the topic. Does not constitute bullying imo. Think very carefully before posting in AIBU, if its advice you want and a more understanding approach I suggest that you post in the other forums.

She could have tried harder with the shoes, for the love of God woman, she could have!!!!!!!

MHW- Why do you keep following TSC around having a go at her? She's an obnoxious cow granted, but enough now

WFS -

I appear to have broken the interwebs, or at least buggered them up a bit so I'm having a huge amount bit of trubs with my advanced search. But I certainly know where you are coming from. And we have all indeed passed a lot of water since then. And without checking I feel sure you will agree that whatever it may have been I was right as usual.

I was under a different username back then. (hence your trouble)

It was nearly a YEAR ago, and I was being really earnest and caring and strokey; and you were being all "THIS IS A TROLL" and I was all, like, Fuck nah stop being such a bitch, and you were all,like, check her profile out tho she is a total twat, and I was all like

Message deleted by Mumsnet

(I would love to know what I'd written, I was mortificado in the morning - bloody drunk mnetting)

mrshighwater follows me around too. I think we are all just going round in ever deceasing circles.

That is what I would class as borderline bullying. Following people and arguing the toss with them because they disagreed with you over somehing or said something to someone else you didn't like.

AND TSC if you are reading this what you said in the HT thread made me howl!!! Ok it was straight to the point but I could see what you were getting at and saw it as a look at what you are doing woman not as a direct diagnoses in a rude way.