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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

my new boyfriend says he is going to vote BNP

459 replies

susia · 02/05/2010 20:51

that's it really, I was really shocked and went into a bit of a rant. I can't believe someone I've been intimate with and been close to would vote bnp.

OP posts:
scottishmummy · 02/05/2010 22:43

what are you seeking susia.when challenged about boyfriend you immediately rally to his defence

so why post

come on!

aibu some key triggers words

bnp
controlling man
he dislike immigrants
sacked for violent conduct

what did you expect responses to be?seriously

this aint tammy wynette,stand by your man, love worth fighting for.cause love of a good woman (you) will change his errant ways

SugarMousePink · 02/05/2010 22:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lowrib · 02/05/2010 22:45

So let me see. This guy is

  • either racist or stupid. Most likely both
  • uptight about sex
  • a prison officer who bullies people who can't get away from him
  • his behaviour is so bad he's actually been sacked from a pretty secure job
  • unemployable, because he's a bully
  • has a chip on his shoulder
  • quite possibly violent (was he violent at work?)

It's not your job to educate him.

It's your job to protect yourself from people like this.

Do you have DCs? If so, it is also your job to protect them from people like this. You are failing them if you don't.

Sorry for the strong words, I mean well. I am trying to talk some sense into you as you are coming across in need of a good shake.

Please, get a grip!

Original poster
susia · 02/05/2010 22:47

I suppose I feel a bit guilty I gave him a hard time last night about the sex issue, this was even before we had the voting conversation. I wasn't trying to make him do something he didn't want to do I was just upset that he didn't want to do it - mainly because we hadn't seen each other for two weeks and I thought he wouldn't have cared.

OP posts:
LordVolAuVent · 02/05/2010 22:48

You will find it hard to get support/understanding for his views, susia - like rasputin, like me, like a lot of others I'm sure, the views of the BNP and your bf are personally offensive to us/our kids.

If you are not racist, you are doing yourself a massive disservice by voting BNP because they are racist. For me, anyone who went ahead and voted for them, insisting they weren't however racist, would piss me off so much in their ignorance that I would have to dump them anyway. Actually it would annoy me more, at least if they admitted they were racist, you could understand their vote.

Gay40 · 02/05/2010 22:49

You'd be better giving him the big heave-ho before it all turns nasty.

RunawayWife · 02/05/2010 22:50

I think I am so almost tempted to use the T word here, so I will wonder off and go advise people how to get to Cardiff or what fridge to get....

SugarMousePink · 02/05/2010 22:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

daftpunk · 02/05/2010 22:51

Susia;

Find out why he will be voting for them...there are various reasons..

I wouldn't dump him....not if I loved him.

tuarag · 02/05/2010 22:52

Susia

I think it is outragious that he wants to vote for the BNP. Point him in the direction of the EDL.

EricNorthmansmistress · 02/05/2010 22:52

Try to separate the issues. So you gave him a hard time - ok. Everyone gets their feelings hurt and overreacts sometimes. You felt rejected and hurt - draw a line under that. the BNP issue is completely separate from that and is far bigger and wider reaching than you having a strop about him rejecting you sexually!

scottishmummy · 02/05/2010 22:52

are you always so passive and accommodating in relationships susia.you posts are all about tippy toeing around him.meeting his needs.justifying his odious views/behaviours

of course the prisoner lied about him
of course the internal investigation was stitch up
of course good guys like him get shat upon by immigrants

does it ever occur he is lying/wrong

dittany · 02/05/2010 22:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EricNorthmansmistress · 02/05/2010 22:53

I feel I have to point out that DaftPunk also supports the BNP....so not an objective viewpoint!

daftpunk · 02/05/2010 22:56

I think it's madness to advise someone to dump her boyfriend just because he will vote BNP...I'm sure you lot wouldn't walk out on your partners just because they decided to vote BNP....jesus christ

SugarMousePink · 02/05/2010 22:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

RunawayWife · 02/05/2010 22:57

And so it begins.....

Gets chair and nibbles

SugarMousePink · 02/05/2010 22:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SugarMousePink · 02/05/2010 22:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Eurostar · 02/05/2010 22:58

So, I repeat, you said you came looking for advice. What sort of advice are you looking for?

scottishmummy · 02/05/2010 22:58

dp,let me assure you my partner spout bnp guff,one of us is gone

attitudinal beliefs,values are intrinsic to person.couldn't be with man i didn't like

missmoopy · 02/05/2010 22:59

A member of the BNP said that "rape is sex, women like sex, so rape shouldn't be the trauma they claim". Do you want to be with a man who votes for this scum? Get rid. Now.

KillerCleavage · 02/05/2010 22:59

It's not just about him voting BNP.

It's about him being controlling.

It's about him being dismissed from his job as a prison officer for bullying an inmate.

Sound like a catch to you?

tuarag · 02/05/2010 22:59

RunawayWife

Me too. Pop corn, anyone?

SugarMousePink · 02/05/2010 23:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.