AIBU to not want to breastfeed?

[VixeyV]

Hi this is my first post but I have been a lurker since the start of my pregnancy.

Anyway, my question is I'm 20 weeks pregnant and the midwife keeps pushing me into breastfeeding. I just don't want to and don't get why she won't stop asking me how I'll feed.

To be honest, the thought of it freaks me out. I didn't breastfeed my daughter and she's fine on formula, she has aptimal because that's the best.

So what do you think? Should my midwife stop nagging me?

Oh dear, are we still on this? Yawn....a bit more research next time please, OP, this wasn't much of a challenge

Vixey - just leave this thread and join an antenatal group - I think it's under "becoming a parent" - join for the month your baby is due - just post on that thread. people on aibu are horrid and a lot of people like to call troll for some reason. When I first posted on MN I found that joining an AN thread was so helpful, I got so much great advice and love the people on my PN thread now

I breast my first daughter for 6 weeks and hated every minuite of it, I was permanantly tired and fed up,I have since had 2 more babies never breast fed them (aptimil was fine for them) they were happy contented babies. Happy mummy happy baby.
Your body, your choice, dont be bullied into anything. Goodluck x

It's obvious from the aptamil thing it's a troll.

This is boring OP, and people have already had these arguments time and time again, so what's the point in starting yet another thread about it just for entertainment? It's not entertaininhg.

I didn't use formula with ds but I have heard people say aptamil is the best one - why does that make her a troll?

WHatever, everyone. Breastfeeding is better but formula isn't poison, and TBH for all the squawking and whining it's not going to be obvious at a glance which hefty great rugby player or company director or syncronised swimmer or whatever was BF or FF. People should probably inform themselves about the options before making a decision, but in the end, your body, your baby, your business.

Cos it gets said on here loads and then someone will come on and say no, no, no, Aptamil just have the biggest marketing budget and spend loads of time telling HCP's that it's the best so that's why it's got that reputation.

If she's been lurking the feeding threads then she;; know that.

She didn't say she'd been lurking feeding threads... if she had been, she'd have posted there.

Sometimes the things we do in our lives that are the most rewarding are different from our previous experiences and make us feel initially uncomfortable & challenged. That's no reason not to do something. Take a deep breath & jump in. Get the support you need to learn these new skills - my hospital ran an amazing & really inspiring breastfeeding workshop - I'm sure you can find help & support too if you look.

Aside from all the pluses to your baby AND YOU (other posters have covered these), don't forget, once you are in the swing of things BF is sooooo easy & convenient.

No sterilising bottles, no getting up in the middle of the night to prepare formula, no lugging loads of feeding crap around with you. All you need is with you - feed your baby without getting out of bed, go anywhere with your baby & a change of nappies. Simple, convenient, cheap as well as lovely. For me BF offered a huge sense of freedom, when all the changes in my life were indicating I should be tied to the house, I could get up & go without all the grind of additional housework keeping bottles steralised & buying formula.

Maybe you feel embarassed or akward at first, but seriously you will move on from that pretty quickly, as it becomes a new habit & you get to grips with this amazing new skill.

I also love how the MW who'll have seen her what, 4 times since booking ( and that's me giving an optimistic estimate) can be 'nagging' her!!! Feeding isn't generally discussed in any detail until 34 wks +.

And yes young troll, you are being unreasonable and selfish. I did the same thing as you with my first 2 kids and still carry the guilt from being so immature and not putting my baby first.

Well whatever, I've had a load of stick being accused of being a troll so I'm doing it back!

And it doesn#t matter what she says if she's a troll! They're supposed to lie, that/s what they do!

Trafficcone - every single time I saw my mw, she asked me if I had thought about how I would be feeding my baby. From the very first appointment onward.
I thought that was great. It got me thinking about bf really early on - I didn't think I'd want to do it, but attended some LLL meetings, talked to mw about it - and got lots of advice on here once baby was born.

So, no, I don't think that is untrue. Even more, I think it's a good thing that mws do this. Not that they should force bf or ff, but just get you to think about it.

lol drivemcrazy!

I've never been accused of being a troll but I hate how people do it. Just don't post if you think it's a troll ffs.

Come over and tell all the people who accused me on my thread then starexpat!!! No one stood up for me there.

You know, I once thought about posting something on a particular board on MN, then I thought, "no, better not. I'd just be called a troll" How sad. Like playground name calling.

Sorry - I only have windows of opportunity when I can post on mn and I usually look to see what's in active convos... or just post on my PN thread
That's probably an MN no-no. lol. Maybe I'll go start a thread about this thread and piss everyone off.

link your thread, I'll go stand up for you now

agree StarExpat, whether the OP is or isn't a troll there was no need for the level of mocking on this thread.

re the comment on aptimal (and if this is a serious post) - you say you picked that formula because you believe (for whatever reason) that it's the best - well if you want the best for your baby, at least give BF a go!

Kind of reminds me of a Wife Swap I saw a few years back - really rich family with the Mum going on and on about £1k for this for DD and thousands for that for DS. She said 'only the best for my family' about 100 times & splashed her cash around on material goods. Then she goes to cook dinner & opens her huge freezer stuffed full of chicken nuggets & chips & deep fries this crap for her family. Only the best? really?

Thank you, SPB, it's the only thing that I really don't like about MN. I love MN and it's a godsend in so many ways, but this sort of thing really makes me and annoyed.

I honestly don't see why... if people think a poster is a troll... well, ignore them, then. Or don't post on that thread or hide it - whatever you need to do for yourself... but real or not real, the information and advice could help someone in the future. I remember that's how I found MN, I google searched something I wanted to know about and got MN threads as search results. I hadn't posted but the information was useful. What on earth is the need for this troll calling lark? It's childish. Really.

Well I troll call with the best of them (not often though as I'm gullible ) but only when I think it's appropriate, remember fake poo couple??

Exactly just because she posts that type of thread does not make her a troll, she just might be misinformed or genuinly does not know what to do. I have posted a coupld of topics last year that stirred up reactions because i was genuinly interested in it and what people though, not because i am a troll, if you read my personal profile i am not, i have been a regular for a couple of years.

Re Aptimel..I never wanted to ff, not for one second, but after birth, when my baby was rapidly losing weight, I was ultra-hormonal and having postnatal panic attacks, I offered ds a top up at about 14 days. I was told, by my GP SIL, that Aptimel was the closest in constitution to breastmilk, though not obviously "as good as".

In the end, I managed to continue with bfing.. he has 8 bfs and 1 ff at 5 months and is doing well, though still gaining weight v slowly: was 8 14 at birth and only 13lbs now despite being ultra long (90th centile!). I've tried to drop the ff on several occasions and it always results in weight loss, hoping to try again when solids come on board. I have, reluctantly, realised he needs the formula, though it always makes me feel lousy..

Is there an 'in joke' about suggesting aptimel is best formula? I don't get why this is, in itself, so amusing?

Well, I troll called after OP posted several times, but didn't respond to questions by me and others asking if she'd never seen breastfeeding vs. bottle feeding threads on here. There were loads of people explaining where the best section to post was and suggesting that this topic, in AIBU, tended to get bad responses.

I don't care if she's a 'troll' in the sense of hairy trucker with keyboard, or just someone who can't be bothered to read replies and keeps posting the same whine - one is just as annoying as the other.

yes but who cares? Why even shout, "troll"? Why not just shrug it off and walk away from the thread and not post?