To Pretend to be Catholic

[Aeschylus]

For our DS to get a School place.

Basically the best primary school in our area is Catholic, and quite frankly I think religion is all a load of old mumbo jumbo.

However we are at a dilemma as to if we should lie and cheat so he gets a place.

ofsted report is fantastic, spoke to the head and he wants to meet us, we wont have a chance if we dont say we are Catholic. I know of some parents who lie about their address to get the school they want, but is this a step to far.

What do you think?

Google? This would be an oral quiz in the head's office!

You'd also be shown a videoed segment of Mass and asked 'What happens next?' and whether you should be standing, sitting or kneeling at that point.

I have not read the whole thread but you are being very very unreasonable.
Why would you want your child to be taught by an organisation that thinks its ok to cover up child sexual abuse.
And to make the children sign secrecy agreements.
And to make adults jump through hoops to try and get recognition for the terrible abuse heaped upon them for years and years.
And an organisation who, especially in Ireland, still wont actually bloody say sorry.

Sorry but I have watched my mum go through hell because of the catholic church.

uh oh

oh dear

YABVU.

Lying and cheating - not teaching your child well, are you?

all the schools my dh went to were roman catholic, and he cant remember to much about infant/junior school, but secondary school he said there were c of e children mixed in to, but it was a rc school. op he says it should say it on the sign outside the school if it is mixed or just for catholic. you may still be in with a chance, just be truthful and phone them and apologise if you have wasted their time, just one question before i go on op have you already actually said they ARE catholic to them yet???

I'm going VERY against the grain here- I think it must be different in England, but here in Scotland the Catholic Schools are nowadays no longer funded by the church, but by the local council, so ANYONE, Catholic or not has the right to choose a catholic school, as long as they are registered for council tax in the local area

I happen to be Catholic, and my dc are all baptised, go to mass etc, but whn I took them to be enrolled in school, noone asked me ANYTHING about my religion. I did think I was going to have to produce their baptism certificates, but the headmistress wasn't interested.

I actually think that is pretty fair. It does seem like a lot of the better schools are catholic, and, since those schools are funded by the council (disclaimer: this may still NOT be the case in England), I don't see why families in the catchment area shouldn't apply and be taken as seriously as catholic parents. I know this works up here, as one of my non-RC friends enrolled her ds in a Catholic school without having to pretend anything.

I sometimes wonder why a non-catholic parent would want their child exposed to the overwhelming catholic ethos of an RC school, especially if it isn't something you believe in yourself. There is a lot more to it than just saying a few prayers- it runs far deeper than that! Also at a time when many of us are feeling a bit disillusioned with Catholicism (recent news stories etc) I am surprised a non-believer would want to embrace it with open arms. Nevertheless, i feel, in a school funded with public money, that should be your right.

But YABU to pretend- you shouldn't have to!

the school with the best ofstead report does not equal the best school for your child

children let the truth slip out, they will eventually rumble you no matter how much you coach them

and at my local RC school the admittance hierarchy goes like this:
baptised and attends weekly since birth
baptised and attends monthly since birth
baptised and attends occasionally
baptised and does not attend
not baptised

you'd have a better shot going for one of the non catholic spaces at the catholic school than going in at the bottom of the catholic list underneath all the kids of families who are active in the parish

Go for it....

the school might educate your child in a spiritual and moral way that you obviously couldn't and dc could turn out a very good Catholic!

One more for the team!

You need to find out the precise requirements for entry to the school - re baptism, how often you need to go to mass, do you have to show that you ate active in teh church, over what period of time etc, you may well already have missed the boat.

Assuming you can do all that you need to look into the RC religion, what the teachings are and so on, and think honestly about whether you are happy with your child being taught those things.

If all of that is fine, the I think go for it. I understand the outrage but frankly it's what everyone does in my area, it is the norm. And disgraceful that people should feel they have to IMO.

Do you think you could get away with pretending to be a Hindu, or a Buddhist and keep it up for years? It will be as difficult pretending to be an active Catholic.

CofE and RC pretty similar really, not like a Jew pretending to be a Hindu or something like that. Both are christian, same basic ideals, same hymns, same ceremonies, order of worship pretty similar.

I have swithced from RC to CofE at there is little difference.

Whoops was reading the other trhead on the same topic where Op is CofE. Just realised that this OP is not.

In which case she needs to go to mass and see how she gets on with it, seeing as she'll be going every week for the foresaable future if she decides to do this.

I also think that most faiths welcome new people and converts.

Oh FFS, this old chestnut...

YABU and hypocritical and deceptive.

You just want us to say it's ok to be those things.

I find this fascinating.

Around here it is the absolute norm, everybody I know is suddenly beavering away at church. Literally everyone.

But then over 50% of the primary schools around here are decided on religious criteria and most schools are oversubscribed. So you either find god in order to get into a school within a reasonable distance, or end up with an hour+ commute each way, or no place at all.

In this area it is the system that is at fault, not the parents.

It is also a bit of a bugger for the people who are hindu, when all of the schools within a reasonable distance are christian.

It's shokcing really when you think about it.

we had DS baptised at the weekend (RC) and on the application form you could indicate is you wanted a place at reserving at one of our local RC schools (bear in mind DS is 7 months old!) if they have something similar they might want to know why you didnt declare so earlier

I was brought up Catholic. I'm not a believer at all now. My sisters children go to a Catholic school and are very fervent about catholicism and I find it bewildering that where my sister and BIL would encourage objective thinking, when it comes to religion they do not at all. BIL not catholic. Even if the Catholic school was the best in our area I would not want my chidren exposed to this sort of religious input because I personally find it difficult. My sister doesn't, so that is her right and choice and I have no problem with that at all. However, as you are clearly not Catholic, have no idea of what being brought up Catholic means, what the commitment and what the level of religious input might be, I would question why you would want that for your children and how will you cope with it? Because you can't think there'll attend a Catholic school and you can just ditch the religious bits as you choose.

mackerel I agree the OP really needs to think about this seriously. It is a huge commitment.

If people want others to respect their religion, then campaign for there to be a total separation between church and education. While your schools are state schools, the rest of us are perfectly entitled to lie through our teeth to get our children into the best schools

church primary schools take kids from a larger area than normal (even more so for the secondaries which are fewer), so only a tiny % of places are given to non church children who live literally on the doorstep.

my friends neighbour can see their nearest school (CofE) from her front door, and her child did not get in, because being honest, she did not tick the church box, recognising this was not fair on some other child who would then lose its place.

i am not saying the system is fair, but thats the system.

not a great start to your relationship with your kids school to get in by lying! not a great example to your child either!

ISNT, its like that here. My neighbours didn't particularly want to use a church school, or necessarily the 'best school', just wanted to ensure a place at our village school within walking distance. So they pewed up. I couldn't stomach it, and had time to drive DD elsewhere, luckily enough for me.

I wouldn't mind if one or two of the local schools was faith - in proportion to the percentage of the population who are actually actively christian - but what are you supposed to do when its the whole area?

I find this hard to answer.

My DH is Catholic but our DCs have not been baptised because I really do not want them to be Catholic and he refuses for them to be anything else. He doesn't practice but it's ingrained I think. I just find so many aspects of the religion dubious so I wouldn't want my DCs to go to a Catholic school.

However, being in the position we are in now, where we have not been offered a place at any primary school in our borough, were I able to turn back the clock and join our local church (the CofE school attached is amazing) I would seriously consider it. It's been a heartbreaking and stressful experience not being offered a school place and if there is anything I could do to change it I probably would.

Move to Ireland, all the schools are Catholic here ( well, 99%). My kid goes to one, much to my annoyance, I wish I could send him to a secular school but there isn't one nearby. So YABVU. I doubt you would get away with it anyway.