To have sex infront of 18 month old

[TwoDotZero]

We were having a cuddle that turned into a bit of a quickie. Ds was playing in his room and occasionally sticking his head around the door but generally not paying much attention to us.

Afterwards I turned around and came face to face with ds sitting on our bed, reading a book and showing me a picture.

He didn't seem at all bothered.
Thoughts?

Getting caught at it very different to doing it knowing your toddler keeps coming in the room and carrying on regardless

Am not prudish
it's just nasty
sex is natural but toddlers don't need to see it

oh my goodness I just re read the original post.

It does NOT NOT NOT sound like the parents were on the bed but nearby to it having sex and when twodotzero turned round THE CHILD was sitting on the bed, reading, showing her a picture. THIS IS QUITE SHOCKING considering they knew he was awake and toddling in during the deed....

quite shocking to me.

it IS all well dodgy imo but its not an offence. i am also surprised that people can remember being 18 months old!

Well I can tell you are thinking of the wrong thing JV, but I would rather not say what the actual thing was because of the reaction here.

Suffice to say, it was very very subtle and the child had no idea what was going on and many adults wouldn't have necessarily known either.

But child walked in at the wrong moment. It happens. You are all assuming they were naked on top of the bed. I doubt very much they were. Wouldn't any 18 month child have laughed to see its parents naked and wriggling on the bed? They wouldn't understand what was going on but they would have thought it curious/funny/wanted to bounce about too if it was really that blatant. I picture a much subtler form of love making going on.

op didn't force her ds vto watch but she was aware he kept coming into the room, just seems sick and wrong to me, call me a prude if you like

dumbledoresgirl's post makes sense to me. people are sounding a bit victorian!

Thats the point !!!!

they were not having sex discretely, thats my issue! not so much the sex!

It sounds too blatant and too disregarding of their child noticing

A nursery teacher friend said one nursery kid she had talked about 'sexing' and used to re create the mum and dad doll THEY SEE MORE THAN WE THINK!!! Thats the point.

This was not necessary exposure

WHY take the risk.

Why not cover up and bonk if they couldnt wait???? Sounds too open and well graphic to me.

Nothing about being prudish ---- inappropriate behaviour.

Dumbledoresgirl, you speak sense.

Otterinaskoda that's not what people are saying. It's also not the end of the world if you are caught at it. but to continue knowing your toddler's popping in and out - well i think that's a bit off. if it makes me a prude then fine.

at otter

re read the OP.

I think they were not on the bed! As they would SURELY have noticed a child creep on with a book - 18m olds are not subtle.

I think it sounds like they were bonking or even, she was on all fours (sorry but it does!) and then she TURNED ROUND and saw HIM (THE CHILD) on the bed.

Paints an all together different picture to me!

Though I may be wrong.

thought??????

Well if he could climb on to the bed right next to you without you noticing then I think it's safe to assume pretty much anything bad could have happened to him and you wouldn't have noticed. I suspect no harm will be done from this one incident. He clearly wasn't frightened or distressed. You need to rethink your sex life though because this is neither safe nor appropriate behaviour. Everybody has sex and when you have small children you do have to seize your moments - but not if doing so means being so unaware of your child you expose them to danger or distress.

To me, the situation wasn't ideal. It isn't something one would want to replicate.

But likening it to paedophilia is just bloody ridiculous and a bit weird tbh.

I have to say I'd prefer it if the OP were to return, though.

i cannot believe you would A) do that and B) tell people you have done that,
it is absolutely sick that you would carry on whilst he popped his head round the door nevermind whilst he was sat on the bed, have you got no morals or self control, surely the first time he put his head round the door should have caused a flustered panic of getting dressed quick and pretending nothing was going on!

Yummy, i don't think doing it on holiday when the DCs are fast asleep is the same, i know i couldn't but i wouldn't do it when they were still in the crib in our room, i am inclined to be squeemish though!

And like others have said, what part of you thinks its ok to leave an 18 month old on their so you can have a quickie, i'm not saying i never left mine when they were that age, but i'm talking taking the bin out or something, i only need to go into a different room for 30 seconds to find DS2 on the dining table or something when i get back!

sorry for the long post but i really am sickened by this and think you need to have a serious think about what the consequences could have been

Can I just point out, all you nutters, that the vast majority of families in the world have one room to live in let alone, sleep in! The vast majority of children in the world are aware of sex, but it is ok because the vast majority of the world aren't all hung up about it! It's only 'freaky', 'wrong', 'sick' etc. in our culture because we're obsessed with paedophilia.

This child is not going to be screwed up by once witnessing his parents having sex by mistake as a toddler. Most of you have completely overreacted.

Children will survive perfectly well having been accidental witnesses to discrete fumbles under the duvet - it's how most families live still.

OP - I don't know how you managed to do it, it would put me off, but I don't think you were sick, or breaking the law, or screwing up your child.

OP - couldn't you just have waited? The appropriate thing to do in that situation would have been to control your sexual urges until your toddler was not within sight/earshot.

LOL @ mumof: "I think it sounds like they were bonking or even, she was on all fours (sorry but it does!) and then she TURNED ROUND and saw HIM (THE CHILD) on the bed."

Sorry but how didd you deduce all that from the OP? You have a vivid imagination!

Should provide the papers with juicy MN fodder anyway!

Well said MrsWobble.

As for the OP coming back: she would be a braver woman than I am if she did. You didn't just say YABU, a lot of you questioned her sanity and accused her of doing something illegal. Poor woman.

Please tell me you are trolling because YABVU.

no it is not appropriate.

Yes, children walk kn on parents by accident - but most responsible adults try not to let this happen.

Saying it's paedophilia is ridiculous.

I disagree dumble sorry but if you re read the op what I said was very plausible and explained when she never heard him get onto the bed.

she did turn round and saw him on the bed sitting showing her a picture so she certainly wasnt facing the door!!! thats the bit that made me

'sickened by this'?

I think those of you who think so strongly about this need to examine your own rather skewed views about sex and where that comes from!