To feel so sad for this mum and baby but still think she could have been more careful?

[Vivia]

Was in Costa just now. I was in the queue getting a takeaway while two mums were sitting with their newborns on the comfy sofa nearby. Very gorgeous scrunchy babies. I noticed that one mum had the baby lying vertically on her lap, so baby's feet at mother's chest and baby's head near the table. I thought it looked precarious.

And it was. As I walked out, I glanced back I noticed the mum reach over her baby's head and pick up the piping hot mug of coffee. She dropped the large mug of black coffee on the child's face and body. In that split second, I almost didn't register what happened. I ran back in. The security guard from nearby was jumped over chairs and tables to get to the baby, the mother was screaming 'help me!' The security had whipped the newborn to a sink of water and staff were calling the ambulance. The baby screamed at first then went horribly silent. Poor child had been hit in the face by a large, falling china mug and thoroughly scalded by coffee.

I feel so sad but wish the mum had realized that reaching over a newborn to pick up coffee is a terrible idea? I don't mean to judge her but

It is isn't it .

If you put Costa Baby and Scalded into Google you get this thread third...

Caveat - i was doing it to look for info.

Maybe MNHQ would consider pulling it later - once people have stopped posting IYSWIM. So it's been discussed, job done, and get rid just in case.

Poor Mum, poor baby. I hope they are both doing OK.

I let my 10 month old son fall down the stairs, stupid accident, didn't need to happen, totally my fault. It was nearly 4 years ago and I still can't talk about it without crying.

You cannot be vigilent all the time. Well, I can't. Mistakes or errors of judgment happen all the time, and sadly some of them lead to horrible accidents.

I clicked to report the thread after I first posted but backed down because I got the impression people thought I was being hysterical.

I reported it earlier (never done that before) but MNHQ reckon it stays.

That was why I put on here that maybe they could quietly delete it later on, everyone seems to have moved on now anyway IYSWIM

I can't believe you think I'm a troll - my last message was meant in good faith and I posted it when I had only read half the posts before noticing the troll accusations. I came on here initially because I was shocked and somehow see MN as helpful in working through difficult times when there's no one around in RL. I did not mean to judge, and later admitted that I probably did in my shock.

You can see that I post often on MN. I'm a decent person. I was on MN much of today. I asked about random, mundane things on other threads to chat, I got on with work, I spared a thought for the family. I did not sit making up sick stories. I feel sick that you think I could make up a sad story like this.

Thanks to everyone who realized I am genuine - those of you who think I'm a troll, I'm sorry to disappoint you.

I'm leaving MN now. Sitting here in RL I'm feeling quite hurt to have been accused when all I wanted to do was express sadness, shock, and reiterate that we must all be careful around babies. This place is not worth real life hurt.

Viva, I don't think you are a troll. I reported the thread because it was so upsetting and did not want the mum in RL to read it.

You must have had a terrible shock.

Please let us know how the baby is if you go back to Costa / find out from local news....

I don't think you are a troll Vivia - I am a bit perplexed at how it went tbh

AIBU is a bear pit at the moment. I don't think anything remotely serious should be posted on here, TBH.

Hello again

FWIW I am stunned at what happened too, and have seriously considered if I want to be part of a community where this can happen.

Viva, don't think it was everyone who posted here, it wasn't.

Take care

Vivia, I dont think you are a troll.

But, you posted about this today, saying you had just got back from the coffee shop.
But there was another thread here yesterday about the same thing, only then it happened yesterday.

I don't think you are a troll.

I don't think you are a troll but I don't think you should have posted the OP in the way you did.

jaimieandhismagictorch I think you have got it in one, way weird atmosphere in MN at the mo...why I wonder?

Oh please, Vivia, it's less about people thinking you're a troll and more about the tone of your original post. Yes, if it did happen, it must have been traumatic for you; yet, there is something that sticks in the back of the throat reading this on this forum. Yes, she ought to have been more careful but that sort of attitude is neither helpful, nor can I see how it would be a source of comfort to you to think that way, given your wish to "[work] through difficult times when there's no one around in RL".

MN is used a lot more widely than people realise, AIBU is one of the most popular forums and should the mother spoken of in your op ever come across this, she will be mortified in a way you just cannot compare to the usual trivia people post on this forum. Perhaps it might be best for you to imagine this as an AIBU post:

"Something terrible happened to me in a cafe earlier today, and I ended up scalding my baby. A thread on a hugely popular parenting forum was brought to my attention, and it was someone posting about what had happened and saying how I ought to have been more careful. I am mortified that someone felt the need to discuss what was such a traumatic situation for me and my newborn in such specific detail, rendering me easily identifiable by others who may know me/live in the same area and discussed in a way that made sure to reiterate what I already knew - that I was at fault. No one can feel worse than I do at this moment in time. AIBU to ask that the thread be pulled? "

Vivia, if your answer to that is "yes", then by all means carry on. But I would hope you can see where those who have disagreed with your need to post this specifically in AIBU in the first place are coming from.

And on that note, I'm hiding this thread.

Most people don't think you're a troll. Don't leave Mumsnet over it.

why shouldn't the op post?
something shocked and upset her, all of a sudden the mn police shout troll and tell her she was wrong to post.
if we abide by these mde up rules juts in case someone might read it, most of the posts on mn would be for the chop.

I would have thought this this thread, whether genuine or not and I have no reason to think otherwise; serves as an extremely good warning to Mothers about hot drinks.

I just read the first 20 or so post on this thread, all going ok, OP not being flamed for thinking the careless mum should have been more careful, then scrolled down and, lo and behold, it turned nasty.
Why does every AIBU thread have to turn so nasty?

Btw, for those of your worried about the baby being scarred for life, I was badly scalded on the face a couple of years ago by boiling water and although it hurt like hell and I looked dreadful for a few weeks afterwards, I'm completely healed and have no scars now.
Hopefully the baby will have the same outcome (and children tend to heal faster).