Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Can we all please try and inhibit segregation amongst people due to race, gender or sexual persuasion?

196 replies

anidea · 22/02/2010 17:16

Hello,

We have recently been in contact with Olivia Vandyk of mumsnet regarding the practises and values of this website.
Here follows a transcript of that conversation, see what you think:

On 21 Feb 2010, at 08:54, James Wallace wrote:

Hello,

My girlfriend and I recently heard about your website and we are interested in your tag line "By parents for parents", when the site is called 'mumsnet'.

We think a title such as this propagates a stereotypical view that women are the main parents, and can't quite believe that anyone would think this as acceptable.

We think we as a society have grown beyond the point where such stereotypes are applicable and we hope we have passed the point where they are acceptable.

We look forward to your response.

Yours sincerely,

James Wallace and Tania Pieri

On 22 Feb 2010, at 09:21, Olivia Vandyk wrote:

Hi there

Thanks for your comments. We hope Mumsnet isn't exclusive to mums and indeed we know we have plenty of dads who log on and contribute. If it doesn't sound too pompous we think the concept of "mumming/mothering" goes beyond gender so don't feel mumsnet is too exclusive. We did think of calling the site parentsnet.com but it just sounded so hideous.

While the majority of our posters are women, we do have Dadsnet specifically for men to chat here
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/dadsnet

But folks won't be surprised or bothered by having a male joining in anywhere on the site.

We also have a section for same-sex parents here
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/gay_parents

Hope this clears up any concerns. Welcome to Mumsnet - do let us know if there's anything else with which we can help
Best wishes
Olivia
www.mumsnet.com

On 22 Feb 2010, at 12:04, James Wallace wrote:

Dear Olivia,

Thank you very much for the response. We're glad to hear that men can and do join in with discussions on mumsnet, but we are somewhat disappointed that there is an apparent need to have separate areas of the sites for dads and gay parents. Every caring parent has one individual goal - doing everything they can to promote the welfare and happiness of their child or children; so why not all work together, talk together, support each other and help promote understanding between different groups whether they are of different gender or different sexual persuasion. These categorisations are irrelevant we believe amongst a community of parents.

We can see that there are definite differences between the sexes in terms of the fact that women are the only gender that get pregnant and have the choice to breastfeed. However, whatever discussions are had between women on the topics of pregnancy or breastfeeding, it would be useful for all parents to join in the conversations so that they may better understand the situation and the difficulties and joys of the process.

We hope you are well and having a happy day,

James and Tania

www.artyempires.com

On 22 Feb 2010, at 12:10, Olivia Vandyk wrote:

Hi James and Tania
I'm having quite a happy day, though the snow is dampening my spirits somewhat as it complicates all manner of the day's logistics!

Thanks so much for your reply.

Your points below actually sound like a great starting point for a a Mumsnet discussion.
The best place to ask for strategies and tips is our Talk board.
www.mumsnet.com/talk
You can post and debate this with our users and see what they think.

Our Talk board is where we get all of our hints and ideas on how to handle issues - you'll be in good hands.
One pointer though, as you're a new poster you may want to avoid posting this in our "am I being unreasonable?" topic to start off with as this is our feistiest area which encourages people to be particularly forthright in their replies.
Again, do get back to us if we can help further.
Best wishes
Olivia
www.mumsnet.com

On 22 Feb 2010, at 12:25, James Wallace wrote:

Okay, thank you for the reply, we will post on the site shortly.

OP posts:
oldenglishspangles · 22/02/2010 18:54

This irreverent thread and the others one are one of the many reasons I love mumsnet.

pagwatch · 22/02/2010 18:54

But isn't it better to wash before you nosh...

weegiemum · 22/02/2010 18:54

James and Tania, for example ........

Rollmops · 22/02/2010 18:55

Dahlin', you have completely missed the main area of segregation around these hallow halls..... namely V versus Non-V.....
You see, some carnivores around here feel rather discriminated against.
I you want to save the World Peace etc. how about starting with serious issues....

Pip pip

Jamieandhismagictorch · 22/02/2010 18:55

taffetacat - Shucks I know. I keep doing "amusing" word-plays today that no-one gets

sarah293 · 22/02/2010 18:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

sarah293 · 22/02/2010 18:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

PixieOnaLeaf · 22/02/2010 18:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

OrientCalf · 22/02/2010 18:58

Battery I thought you were taking the piss, but no:

'I take your mushroom Wellington'

sarah293 · 22/02/2010 19:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Batteryhuman · 22/02/2010 19:04

here and look for the extract from the book in the left hand menu

Rollmops · 22/02/2010 19:05

You see, it's all about 'em veggies, even poetry [howling like madwoman, can we please have the link ]

scottishmummy · 22/02/2010 19:06

cut & paste she said/i said is so lame.what the hell is your point or is this a general diatribe

Jamieandhismagictorch · 22/02/2010 19:09

Dangle and mess with me !

thehillsarealive · 22/02/2010 19:10

oh for heavens sake - can they just fuck right off and stop spamming all over the site??

who was it who had that funky line for those trip trappin' people????

Tame Rules On Light Legs, you get the jist????

I have not seen any sign of segregation on this site of prejudice regarding anything; with the exception of BIG (((((huggy hugs))))

so YES YABU

Flightattendant · 22/02/2010 19:17

Is that poetry real?????

sarah293 · 22/02/2010 19:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

PixieOnaLeaf · 22/02/2010 19:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

mrsruffallo · 22/02/2010 19:25

Nothing wrong with veggie verse, it's one of my hobbies;

The spuds are baking in the oven
I hesitate
The courgette twitches as I tighten my grip
I see the sinister knife glint menancingly
I am invigorated
I know what I must do

pagwatch · 22/02/2010 19:26

I bought a notepad made from elephant dung at Oxfam last week.

Mermaidspam · 22/02/2010 19:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Mermaidspam · 22/02/2010 19:28

Sorry, didn't realise we'd moved on to Veg-porn

PixieOnaLeaf · 22/02/2010 19:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

zapostrophe · 22/02/2010 19:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

pagwatch · 22/02/2010 19:43

I am plaesed that veggies get porn now. It always seemd so unfair that meat free meant meat free