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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

family changing rooms and nakedness......

154 replies

allthreerolledintoone · 10/02/2010 10:37

i took dd and ds swimming the other day and spotted a family changing room which was good because ds is too young to go himself and i wouldnt want him to. Anyway obviously there were other families mummys and daddys etc in there and showers and changing cubicles etc. well after swimming i jumped into the showers with the kids and focusing on my business when i turned around and noticed the women next to me was innocently showering but completely naked. Anyway i came out of the shower to get my bits on the bench and the womens husband was also completely naked he's the oblivious to anyone else giving hiself a good old towel rub as if he were in his own bathroom at home.

Well i didnt know where to look or what to make of it tbh.Part of me thought well good on them for not being shy about their bodies but then i felt uncomfortable with another mans bits on show right next to me. Dd was mortified and so i quickly hushed them into the changing cubicles. I know its is hard to matain your modesty when getting changed but surely it can't be right to have it on display in a family area? what do you think?

OP posts:
EleanorBuntingCupcake · 10/02/2010 10:39

at least he wasn't blowdrying his member!

Original poster
allthreerolledintoone · 10/02/2010 10:40

lol thank god for that!

OP posts:
Hullygully · 10/02/2010 10:41

This sort of thing makes me so aghast.

LouIsOnAHighwayToHell · 10/02/2010 10:41

Well it is a family changing room. They were only naked. Everyone has the same bits and pieces jsut differently arranged. Being naked is not shameful and yes while I may not want to see grandpas saggy balls I am not offended. Just move away if it bother you.

Macdog · 10/02/2010 10:42

I'd have been shocked TBH - surely inappropriate around other people's children?

(waits to be flamed)

Rubyrubyruby · 10/02/2010 10:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

EleanorBuntingCupcake · 10/02/2010 10:43

it isn't the norm in thsi country to be neckid. i think they were ponces showing how scandanavian they are

NoahAndTheWhale · 10/02/2010 10:44

Were the naked people part of a family? I would probably feel a little unnerved about other people being naked around me but don't feel there's anything wrong with it.

smokinaces · 10/02/2010 10:44

law about what??? being naked in a changing room?? seriously? they were showering and getting dressed, nothing more.

YABU. Its a family changing room. its a naked body. Get over it.

posieparker · 10/02/2010 10:44

I think that, when in a mixed changing room, people should assume that others don't want to see, or their children to see, you naked. TBH I can't imagine, in a country where boys aren't allowed in women's toilets past the age of seven, that it's appropriate for adults to be stripping off in the family public area. I would assume if both DH and I went swimming that we'd all go in a changing room(large one) or we'd take turns to change.

ImSoNotTelling · 10/02/2010 10:45

I would be a bit startled, but not offended.

There isn't a law against it for crying out loud. Reporting them is a bit mad TBH.

ImSoNotTelling · 10/02/2010 10:47

Boys aren't allowed in womens toilets over age 7? Really?

What is the cutoff age for girls in the gents?

EleanorBuntingCupcake · 10/02/2010 10:49

what are 8 year old boys doing in the loos?

Rhubarb · 10/02/2010 10:49

I can see both points of view. Personally | don't mind wandering around naked in front of my kids, I don't think the body is anything to be ashamed of.

We also passed a nudist park once in Marlborough, we were on a bridge overlooking the park and had no idea it was a nudist place until we saw some old people wandering around with hiking boots and bobble hats and not much else! They obv knew they could be seen from the road but didn't care, and why should they?

I would accept that in some places you might just catch a glimpse of a naked body. One of those places would be the swimming pool.

Would you go up to naked sunbathers on the beach and ask them to cover up because there might be children around?

Your reaction would encourage your children to be embarrassed by nakedness and that is a shame. You can't imagine all adults to be paedos. Everyone has the same bits and pieces and this wouldn't bother me in the slightest. I'm rather disappointed that it bothers other people to such an extent they would report those parents.

Hullygully · 10/02/2010 10:50

It is but one step away from a full blown orgy.

(EBC - I like your name vair much)

Lymond · 10/02/2010 10:51

I wouldn't like this. Don't think its reportable either though.

Rhubarb · 10/02/2010 10:52

hully!

KeyOui · 10/02/2010 10:52

I admit i'd have been a bit shocked, but that's my problem for being a prude.

I think it's fine, in the context of a family changing room it doesn't seem inappropriate at all.

EleanorBuntingCupcake · 10/02/2010 10:52

cheers hully!

its cultural innit. i would feel weirded out by a strange neckid man at close proximity. bit like birds, don't mind them out in the wild but when they are in a confined space flapping about i am totally freaked.

Rubyrubyruby · 10/02/2010 10:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
allthreerolledintoone · 10/02/2010 10:56

smokinaces i actually said i didn't know what i thought i am over it im just asking other people what would they think.Can we not just express our views and have a discussion without telling people get over it. I hear alot of people especially on here that hate being naked in front of their own children for goodnessake.

OP posts:
minxofmancunia · 10/02/2010 10:56

yanbu, it's unnecessary, the family changing rooms at our gym have huge family changing cubicles so you don't have to strip in the communal bit.

Eglu · 10/02/2010 10:57

At my local swimming pool which doesn't have mixed changing. It is only men and ladies, there are signs up asking you not to shower naked. I think it is perfectly reasonable.

I am not a prude but I think the gentleman should have been changing in a cubicle. And his wife should have had a swimsuit on in the shower.

Original poster
allthreerolledintoone · 10/02/2010 10:59

Oh they did have children and i wasn't offended but obviously a bit taken aback and dd was very embarressed.I didn't report because i know it was innocent. If i had boobs like that id be showing them off not sure about the winkle know

OP posts:
OtterInaSkoda · 10/02/2010 11:00

BuntingCupcakes - I think you're right. The nekkid family were ponces showing off their liberal Scandi-ness.

Hmm. I do rather think that, out of respect for families who prefer not to let it all hang out (possibly for religious reasons), that it would be polite not to wave one's member about in a family changing room. It would annoy me.

I wouldn't complain, but I might write to the pool's manager and ask what their stance is on it, and suggest that they ought to publicise this (as in "You may see naked people here" or "We politely request that you refrain from displaying todgers and muffs in the family area") so that everyone knows where they (ahem) stand.