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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

8 boys and wanting a girl

408 replies

icarriedawatermelon2 · 02/02/2010 19:10

AIBU to think that this programme was very unlikely to ever be called 8 girls and wanting a boy poor boys

The comments on the website about the programme are so sad

www.channel4.com/programmes/8-boys-and-wanting-a-girl

OP posts:
kissyfurschaos · 04/02/2010 21:37

So annoyed.
I found out with DD's scan that she had such serious abnormalities she would never survive- I would have killed for a healthy baby of either sex.
I now have a DS and although part of me would love a girl to do 'girly' things I really don't care. He is healthy and alive and thats all that matters. Oh and loved very much loved.
I absolutely was a wreck during DS's scans but for different reasons that I thought they were going to give me bad news that the baby wasn't viable.
Can't believe she likens it to not being able to have a child- so insensitive.

tinierclanger · 04/02/2010 21:37

I totally get you might have a preference or even a strong desire for one sex. I just don't get why you would not care that your existing kids find that out, whatever your issues are. Because it will affect them. And I also think it's a massive burden if you do get the 'wanted' one to fit some model. None of it bodes well for anyone concerned.

PacificDogwood · 04/02/2010 21:42

I have had 4 MCs, one of which we know was a female embryo (genetic analysis). Yes, I do sometimes think "what if?" but more as a passing thought as in "where would I be now if I had stayed with my 1st boyfriend?", not as a regret that is shaping my entire family planning.

I have always wanted a larger family and consider myself lucky and blessed with my 3 (soon to be 4) DSs .

That American woman is a worry...

I think I will switch off and eat chocolate instead .

expatinscotland · 04/02/2010 21:46

how can she say she hasn't got money when she's able to afford to have five kids?!

and look at that house!

Lizzylou · 04/02/2010 21:46

kissyfurschaos and verytellytubby, I am so sorry that you are upset by this, I completely understand why you are, so sorry.
My SIl has 1 boy and is PG again, she has had lots of miscarriages and she is just so happy to be viably pg again...
I also know of people who cannot have children at all, they had their last IVF treatment and won't be having any more.

This is all just so selfish and wrong.

expatinscotland · 04/02/2010 21:48

oh, ffs! these people do not have financial problems!

StrictlyKatty · 04/02/2010 21:50

The size of their houses! It seem only rich people can afford to have GD If you're poor you just have to lump it!

jellybeans · 04/02/2010 21:51

Ugh that woman who said it was like being infertile!! My boys are boistrous but so is my DD2! Poor unborn baby and older brothers!!! What ungrateful women..

mrsgboring · 04/02/2010 21:51

I can't believe the number of comments on gender preference I've heard and they are nearly all pro-girl, anti-boy. The extreme ones always are. It makes me so One "friend" spent the first few months after the birth of her DD asking me "Wouldn't you like to have a girl, MrsGB?" as though I stupidly made the wrong choice at the shop. Even reminding her curtly "I did. She died." didn't stop her.

I'm assuming that some people have enough sensitivity to keep their pro-girl anti-boy comments to themselves, when talking to a woman who lost a girl and now has 2 sons. So I conclude (possibly erroneously) that the pro-girl bias is massive.

This programme is helping me. I do feel sad never to have a DD (DS2 wasn't planned to be the last, but pregnancy was extra-traumatic and DH can't face it again) but I have very little in common with most of the very silly women on here. I adore my boys and am delighted to have them.

frogetyfrog · 04/02/2010 21:52

Oh this is really pissing me off now. How insensitive are these women. Those poor existing kids. I hate people saying things to me about my three dds and how it would be nice for me to have a boy. I feel like whacking them, especially when (many) say it in front of my lovely girls. Its life - get a life you idiots. Some people produce girls, some boys, some mixed. Some of our girls will be tomboys, some lesbian, some hate pink, some end up loving pink. Some boys will end up girly, some gay, some love pink, some love blue! Even if the idiots on tele have a girl, she may not live up to expectations. And I do not agree that girls are easier. They have their own challenges - personality is far more important in the easy stakes than sex.

expatinscotland · 04/02/2010 21:52

That's what I was thinking, SK! Fuckin' hell. That gal with six of them was on some manor place.

jellybeans · 04/02/2010 21:53

I also agree that when you have severe abnormailities diagnosed (i did too at 20 weeks) and losses (I had 4, 2 after 20 weeks) then you have a totally different perspective.

expatinscotland · 04/02/2010 21:56

Aw, makes me want to go and cuddle wee man.

Nicola's a prize cow.

How do such bitches end up with someone so rich?!

mrsgboring · 04/02/2010 21:57

Very hideous wedding dress for the mum of fabulous twin girls (oh and some boys knocking around the place somewhere)

StrictlyKatty · 04/02/2010 21:59

You can have the dream Nicola if you have a LOT of money and a really weak DH who will take you to Spain for gender selection!

tinierclanger · 04/02/2010 21:59

Why did they make this programme just focused on women who want girls though? Seems a bit odd. I can't believe there isn't anyone desperate for a boy.

shabbapinkfrog · 04/02/2010 21:59

Not read the whole thread (too busy throwing stuff at the telly!!) I have been lucky enough to have four amazing, handsome, wonderful sons a woman could ever wish for.

The twins are now 28, third son is 25 and youngest son is 12. Very sadly one of my twins died and my third son was killed in a RTA.

Part of me understands their longing for a girl but a massive part of me wants to put a brick through the tv and just scream 'It doesn't matter a pissing piggin' bit the sex of the child - IT MEANS NOTHING!!!

Being a mum is the most amazing 'job' I have ever done - truly, truly, wonderful.

....and, guess what? My only grandchild - A LITTLE LAD is total amazing as well xx

Lizzylou · 04/02/2010 22:00

mrsgboring , HIgh Five.
We were thinking of ttc again over CHristmas but have decided no.
I have just been up to see my amazing and affectionate little boys in bed, one has a teddy stuffed up his PJ's and the other has a mass of teddies on his pillow. They adore me and revere me, I am the only female in the house.
Gawd, to even think of making them feel inadequate or not what I wanted, makes me feel physically sick.

Boobz · 04/02/2010 22:05

Just how much does the mother of 8 boys look like Nicholas Lyndhurst (Rodney from Only Fools and Horses)??

Spooky.

shabbapinkfrog · 04/02/2010 22:05

Lizzy - massive 's at Teddies in beds....boys melt my heart x

NotAnOtter · 04/02/2010 22:06

surprised that there is such bad feeling on here
i thought the women all came across very well

all except the SMOG

frogetyfrog · 04/02/2010 22:07

Whats a SMOG?

Lizzylou · 04/02/2010 22:08

Aww, Shabba, mine melt mine, bet yours do th same

To think they'd ever feel 2nd best breaks my heart tbh.

Little boys are such a curious mix of bravado and vulnerability, aren't they?

NotAnOtter · 04/02/2010 22:09

smug mum of girls

frogetyfrog · 04/02/2010 22:10

Oh. Im meant to be one of them then.

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