Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

8 boys and wanting a girl

408 replies

icarriedawatermelon2 · 02/02/2010 19:10

AIBU to think that this programme was very unlikely to ever be called 8 girls and wanting a boy poor boys

The comments on the website about the programme are so sad

www.channel4.com/programmes/8-boys-and-wanting-a-girl

OP posts:
frogetyfrog · 04/02/2010 22:11

Agree that the other two came over ok. But the woman that eventually had twin girls seemed awful.

mrsgboring · 04/02/2010 22:12

Lizzy - high five back

My DS1 doesn't really do teddies. I'm hoping DS2 will adopt all the cuddly animals. Maybe even the dollies....

Sassybeast · 04/02/2010 22:13

Feeling a great deal of sympathy for the woman with the 8 boys - I think a huge amount of her issues are down to the death of the baby girl.

Loath and despise the spolied one - from the second she uttered the words' Not being able to have a girl is like not being able to have children at all' I wanted to reach in and punch her. Still at least she'll be rich enough to pay for the therapy for the boys when they have to listen to their little sisters telling them how special THEY are because they are 'chosen'.

The other 2 I have no strong feelings about but I'm amazed that all 4 husbands seemed to be fairly spineless really. I know it doesn't tell the whole story but none on the men seemed in anyway enthusiastic about wanting a girl.

Couldn't empathise with the women at all

pooka · 04/02/2010 22:14

I just find it so depressing that girls = love shopping and princesses and boys = let them run wild with guns and motors.

Is just so stereotypical - I do think it's important to at least make an effort to avoid it. Fair enough dd went through a long and arduous princess sparkle pink phase (might be coming out the other side) and ds1 is really into monsters. But I've always tried to imbue them with a sense that boys can like pink and girls can be powerful and not swoony.

Find it hard to watch without being critical, but trying not to because have girl and 2 boys, so a "balance" (their words).

Funnily enough I've always wanted the other sex (while obviously really wanting them to be healthy). So wanted a boy when had dd, a second girl when had ds1 and vaguely thought a girl would be nice when pregnant with ds2. But since he had rhesus disease and would not therefore risk a future pregnancy, all my recent musings have been about the chances of having a 4th baby that would be rhesus negative. Which is pretty unlikely as have 3 children who are rhesus positive now.

NotAnOtter · 04/02/2010 22:19

agree about show being stereotypical

i have five boys and a girl who is 2nd and our house is very quiet they do gender neutral and some stereotypically female stuff...

some of the boys have long hair and we have no guns or swords

the girls in the show were sickly sweet and will with any luck be beastly spoiled teenagers and mum will need the boys shoulders to cry on

I would LOVE more girls but have to shout from the treetops BOYS ROCK!!!

why? because they do

Mishy1234 · 04/02/2010 22:20

I felt sorry for the lady who had lost her baby girl too and agree with Sassybeast that her feelings were more about that loss than just wanting a girl.

It was a shame that the only one who got the girl(s) she craved was the spoilt one and her comment about it being like being unable to have children was ridiculous.

The others I did empathise with to some extent, as they seemed so distressed about the situation.

pooka · 04/02/2010 22:24

Agree totally that boys rock. Mine are delectable, just as is dd.

Try gender neutral with dd and ds1, but is a bit like flogging a dead horse. Though am relieved that dd appears to be losing her passion for pink (bleurgh).And ds1 (4.5) has spent the last few days carting his hot water bottle (aka "bessie the snow girl" around with him). Which make a change from weaponry.

DS2 - is only 5months, so who knows what he'll be like when older.

But then I suppose that is the joy of children - one size/sex doesn't fit all. How boring it would be if all boys were boys and all girls were girls.

larks35 · 04/02/2010 22:25

I think what saddened me about this programme was that it seemed that all families featured had only had that many children in order to get a girl . The 'country pile' woman was too awful for words, but the other one with 4 boys, 2 of
them twins made me feel a bit bothered. Her oldest had quite obviously caught on that she was disappointed about another boy and I felt so sad for him, he was totally in tune with the bad vibe coming from her.

I thought early on in the programme that if any of the women got their girl she would be turned into the most precious of princesses, and the 'country pile' twin girls proved that.

Sassybeast · 04/02/2010 22:25

Oh yeah - meant to add in about the sterotypical rubbish - DD is going clay pigeon shooting with her dad this weekend and would run a mile if I made her try on pink sparkly shoes. Spoiled mum would probably disown one of her princesses

larks35 · 04/02/2010 22:26

I think what saddened me about this programme was that it seemed that all families featured had only had that many children in order to get a girl . The 'country pile' woman was too awful for words, but the other one with 4 boys, 2 of them twins made me feel a bit bothered. Her oldest had quite obviously caught on that she was disappointed about another boy and I felt so sad for him, he was totally in tune with the bad vibe coming from her.

I thought early on in the programme that if any of the women got their girl she would be turned into the most precious of princesses, and the 'country pile' twin girls proved that.

NotAnOtter · 04/02/2010 22:27

agree
my dd is sooo not girly but not tomboyish in the least

being surrounded by brothers suits her just fine - queen of the otter household

she drives her brothers NUTS [GRIN]

NotAnOtter · 04/02/2010 22:27

even!

shabbapinkfrog · 04/02/2010 22:28

larks I noticed that as well - her eldest son looked very sad about it all.

memorylapse · 04/02/2010 22:36

country pile woman was vile..and I really felt for her 4 gorgeous sons as her two little girls now seem to be her world...no doubt they will turn into spoilt pampered princesses(if they havent already)

I have 2 girls and 2 boys..but have also lost 2 girls and 1 boy so my children are doubly precious and sex is irrelevant..however..Im more likely to go clothes shopping with my 15 year old son than my 5 year old daughter

Ive been told that DC5 is a girl..but I dont care..all I want is a healthy child in my arms

jellybeans · 04/02/2010 22:41

Ugh she just wanted to treat them like little dolls.

sweetkitty · 04/02/2010 22:51

Cannot relate to these women at all.

I'm pregnant with no4, a boy after 3 girls and the number of people who have congratulated me on it being a boy, the well dones, your DH must be chuffed to bits is astounding. We wanted a fourth baby who happens to be a boy, we were expecting a girl, we are shocked he's a boy. DD2 is an out and out tomboy as well she is delighted to have someone to share her toys with now.

I shall punch anyone who says anything about how pleased we are to finally have a boy in front of my girls as if they don't matter as much.

There's more to children that what is and isn't between their legs.

FimBOW · 04/02/2010 22:59

Sorry not read all the posts but that rich woman, god she needed a good slap and what was the Belle wedding dress all about?

I have one of each and someone once said to me "oh one of each, how very clever" wtf?

DorotheaPlenticlew · 04/02/2010 23:03

So glad I am not watching this. All through this and related threads in recent days, I have been getting crosser and crosser about the whole issue just cannot grasp why these people think it is OK to have such blatant prejudice and brandish it in front of their existing DCs. Wrong either way, whether they are "desperate" for a girl or a boy (though it usually seems to be for a girl). The woman in an article linked from other thread who compared having more than one boy to having "the same Action Man" made my blood boil ffs, children are PEOPLE!

Just so damaging and sad.

DS is cuddling his soft toys in his cot too Nelson the elephant, Wilbur the pig and Edward the puffin are all in there tonight. 'Tis crowded.

FiveGoMadInDorset · 04/02/2010 23:05

Again haven't read the thread but Nichola annoyed me. Having a girl does not gurantee the frilly pink and sparkly dresses. DD age 4 only wears boys clothes, hasn't worn a skirt/dress for 2 years. This evening she said when I was a baby I was a girl, now I am a tomboy.

DorotheaPlenticlew · 04/02/2010 23:09

Sweetkitty, now I'm worried 'cos I am one of the people who expressed excitement about the surprise news you were having a boy the other day on your names thread

But honestly, I only meant because it was a bit of a shock bombshell & therefore rather exciting -- didn't meant to imply it wouldn't have been equally lovely to have a new wee sister for your DDs. Hope I wasn't sounding like one of a chorus of girl-bashers.

pigletmania · 04/02/2010 23:12

I have just watched it and the lady with 4 boys (pg with another) , how must her dh feel that he cant provide her with what she is really obessed with, and making him feel like a failure. She walking about with a cloud over her head, poor boys they must be picking up vibes off their mother. As for Nicola , shallow or what! She would not marry her dp unless he provided her with a girl , just as well then she had twin girls.

pigletmania · 04/02/2010 23:19

I just have one dd, had a m/c at christmas. My dd is nearly 3 and is the most unfemanine girl imaginable , does not like hair being put into bunches, princess things, kiddie make up, prefers really to wallow in mud quite literally and get really mucky.

nikki1978 · 04/02/2010 23:32

I did feel sorry for the lady with four boys who found the 5th boy she was carrying was another boy. She was obviously trying very hard to be brave about it despite how sad it felt for her.

Agree that the rich woman did not come across well - especially where she said at the end that if people wanted a girl enough they could have one. How very insensitive!

The saddest part of the whole thing for me weirdly was when they told the American lady that one of the eggs was female and they said shall we disregard the rest (or something along those lines)? And she said yes with no hesitation. I just thought those poor baby boys

nikki1978 · 04/02/2010 23:32

*5th baby not boy

NotAnOtter · 04/02/2010 23:46

nikki yes i agree

infact I cried when she said that... I felt quite cross ...I said to dp - 'no hesitation ! she did not flinch ........ someone else could have those little boys'

Swipe left for the next trending thread