...to think that a man who "doesn't drive" is not remotely sexy

[AnyFucker]

I saw this on another thread (doesn't matter which) and didn't want to hijack it with my silly ramblings

but, I can't imagine being with a man who "doesn't drive" (disabilities notwithstanding)

just someone too lazy to learn, who would let their OH chauffeur them around

there is something very appealing (sexy) about a man who drives well

mind you, I have a thing about a well-shaped wrist on a man , and driving in short sleeves shows that off to perfection

am I showing my age here ?

DH does cycle and walk.

Most people who drive and/or have a car don't drive everywhere.

That's not really what the thread is about.

But it's just, well, that he can drive and has a license and men who don't or can't some women don't find attractive.

Same way some women don't find men with facial hair attractive, or men in certain professions, or men who own BMWs, have small wangers, etc.

'It's like me saying I can admire a woman for being funny, attractive, creative and a good mother, but that she "has to" have perfect teeth, nails, hair and designer frocks like Cheryl Cole before she can be considered a "proper woman."'

No, it's not.

It's about a preference. And everyone has them when it comes to selecting mates.

A smooth torso, Riven. I gotta have a smooth torso.

And I like 'em lean and tall.

Now my pal always found blokes I found attractive too skinny.

As she puts it, she likes a teddy bear and she needs 'something to grab'.

Different strokes . . .

We've already seen on this thread how adverse some women are to men who wear short sleeves.

And apparently, this proves a preference for men in certain professions more than others.

Ho hum.

I told DH this, because he's in one of those professions with a uniform and one of the options is a short-sleeved top in warm weather.

But instead of being black affronted and labelling such women snobs, he just shrugged.

Because really, so what? Why take it so personally that some people find men who don't drive unattractive?

There are enough in the world for all of us.

Say what you like, obviously, but just be aware that you then forfeit the right to blame men for having neanderthal old-fashioned attitudes if you only help to foster them.

UQD, I admire men for lots of things

where did I imply that being a skilled driver was the only thing I might fancy him for ??

I've just been nagging DH to have a shave, Riven.

'but just be aware that you then forfeit the right to blame men for having neanderthal old-fashioned attitudes if you only help to foster them.'

Right, so men who drive are therefore, following your line of logic, old-fashioned cavemen.

DH was a SAHD for 4 years.

Anyfucker - you didn't, but your OP was not overtly "I admire my DH in a positive way for being a skilled driver", it was "I'm going to be very childish and negative and diss men who don't." I have just gone back and read it again to make sure.

I love it when people say "following your line of logic" in order to deliberately make you say what they wish you'd said, rather than what you actually did.

Riven - quite - it's about time we stopped thinking it was in any way grown-up to be dependent on a mineral slime...

UQD, a thread that runs to 7 pages is going to have some revision going on, it's only natural

or else it would have fizzled out after the first few posts...this sure has got legs

also, although I don't expect you to be a mindreader my OP was in reaction to another thread that I alluded to in my OP...and then reinforced again several times in response to others

did you not read it properly?

if you woul like to go back to the very strict original premise that is fine...but a bit boring tbh

I didn't see the other thread. I am only commenting on this one.

UQD, if your throbbing sex-machine has been manufactured without any plastics, oils or other crude oil by-products I will be very impressed.

Does it look like this?

of course you can only comment on this one, as I said, the other thread wasn't integral to my point...it just highlighted something to me

and this is AIBU

some peeps get it, some don't

ohhh, look at that wrist though...

Obviously we are all dependent on it to an extent - even if we get public transport. I just said we don't need to feel smugly grown-up about being proud of it, as if there is something terribly manly about driving - which is, at the end of the day, just a mechanical process like loading the dishwasher. Isn't it??

Because implying that driving is sexy is very dangerous - it fuels a car-worshipping culture and the excessive confidence and aggression of those who see their car as some sort of penis-extension.

OP - no idea whether YANBU or YABU TBH

Can you believe that I cannot think of any male friend / acquaintance etc. who cannot drive.

Men who are so into driving, and worshipped by women for it, actually remind me of men who have great big slavering toothy evil-looking dogs straining at the leash.

A friend who lives in Lewisham was pondering on the excessive numbers of men with such beasts in that part of London. He concluded, amusingly, "I can only assume it is because they are not fortunate enough to possess a penis."

You didn't say be proud of it.

You said dependent on it.

Revisionism, eh? Awful behaviour.

In my experience drivers do tend to drive everywhere. I see people do it all the time - short distances that could easily be cycled or walked.

I think there's a stigma attached to being a non-driver whether a man or a woman. As a female non -driver who has skills that not all others have, I don't say things like 'why don't you play the piano, are you a loser?' or 'why can't you swim very well it's pathetic' I wouldn't be that rude or presumptuous.