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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Kissing on the mouth

135 replies

wellywoo · 26/11/2009 22:40

Went to visit family for the weekend and two of my DH's sisters gave DD (5 months) a big cuddle then kissed her on the mouth - a few times.
I was so angry but didn't say anything, didn't want to 'cause a scene' but now wish I had said something.
I wouldn't dream of kissing someone elses baby on the mouth.....am I being unreasonable?

OP posts:
themildmanneredjanitor · 26/11/2009 22:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BoysAreLikeDogs · 26/11/2009 22:42

why would you be angry?

did they have cold sores?

PotPourri · 26/11/2009 22:43

Don't see what is wrong with kissing a relative on the mouth. That is how my DCs kiss their aunts adn uncles - very cute imo

meltedchocolate · 26/11/2009 22:43

umm... they are auntys no? its not like it is a strangers baby???

Totally bizarre???? Please dont tell me this is where society is at now

pookamoo · 26/11/2009 22:44

The jury's out on MN on this one, I think you'll get a pretty even split.
It was never something we did in my family but I sometimes get DD on the mouth when I go to kiss her little face (1 year). I would be a bit uncomfortable if someone else did it (apart from DH I think).
I have seen threads on here where keyworkers at nursery were kissing DCs on the mouth. I wouldn't be happy with that.
I think it's just a really personal thing.

YANBU

(and I also wouldn't want someone else's baby's snot and dribble on my face from a mouth kiss, but DD's is somehow ok!)

claw3 · 26/11/2009 22:45

Only danger i can see with a relative kissing a baby on the mouth, is cold sores.

Vallhala · 26/11/2009 22:46

You're not unreasonable to have opinions on how others interact with your baby. I guess that the loving aunties didn't mean to offend and didn't see that they might upset you. I wouldn't kiss someone's babe or child on the mouth but wouldn't be concerned under the circumstances you describe if someone had done so to my 2 when they were babies.

If it really bugs you and it happens again, you may like to say that you'd rather they didn't as tiny babies can easily catch colds etc and you don't want titch to become ill. That way you don't hurt the aunties' feelings but get your point over and hopefully get the practice stopped.

I may be wrong but it sounds like the aunties are young and/or childless, which might explain it?

VinegarTits · 26/11/2009 22:46

YABU

pookamoo · 26/11/2009 22:47

It's different somehow if the baby kisses you on the mouth.
I don't think it's about society, or a new thing. There were plenty of kisses for me growing up, but not on the mouth. I think it's different in different families.

dearprudence · 26/11/2009 22:48

How dare they love their neice? Bitches.

YABU.

SixtyFootDoll · 26/11/2009 22:48

I dont get it?

morningpaper · 26/11/2009 22:49

YABU (just have to add my vote to the hung jury)

morningpaper · 26/11/2009 22:50

NO it is like the ripping perforations thing

You either get it or you just DON'T

Tizzyjacko · 26/11/2009 22:51

depends how you were brought up. I still greet my mum and brothers with a kiss on the lips and it never bothered me when they kissed my babies. It bothered the DH though who would greet his Mum with a manly handshake.

Chickenshavenolips · 26/11/2009 22:52

YABU.

Tizzyjacko · 26/11/2009 22:52

No tongues involved? or is that just being facetious?

MaryMotherOfCheeses · 26/11/2009 22:55

I don't get why you were so angry.

It's not something I'd do. Babies lips are usually snotty for a start (or was that just DS?) But essentially, there's nothing wrong with it. Nice that they wanted to be so affectionate, tbh.

sb6699 · 26/11/2009 22:56

Sorry - YABU. They're you're sisters. Why would you have a problem with this?

My family regularly kiss my dc's on the mouth. DD2 even kisses her nursery teachers on the mouth.

My best friends DD always kisses me on mouth.

I would be a startled if a stranger did it but I think my friends and family demonstrating their love for my children so openly is a wonderful thing.

Suppose is a horses for courses kind of thing.

tiredfeet · 26/11/2009 22:57

I think it does just depend on the family. I would find this really uncomfortable, but then we were a 'hug' family, don't think I've ever kissed any of my family, except maybe had the odd kiss on the forehead / head from my parents.

But if its their normal way I think they might understandably get quite upset if they were asked to do differently, and if your daughter doesn't have a problem with it then its best to stay quiet I think

hatebeak · 26/11/2009 22:59

YANBU. At all. It's unnecessary - it's not like a cuddle or a kiss on the cheek/head is horribly cold and Blytonesque - and it does pose heath risks to a young baby that trounce any sentimental ideas about it being cute.

lockets · 26/11/2009 23:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

meltedchocolate · 26/11/2009 23:03

Does your Dh mind?

MrsMcJnr · 26/11/2009 23:05

My FIL did this last week and both DH and I were a bit taken aback to be honest, not for any other reason than that it surprised us to see that intimacy when we are not used to having him around (we live abroad)

mayorquimby · 26/11/2009 23:06

you are insane

nothingofthesort · 26/11/2009 23:07

YANBU. I find it pretty . IMO and IME only lovers kiss on the mouth.

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