Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be pissy with the way dh "looked after" ds today?

133 replies

phdlife · 14/11/2009 11:30

There's more to it than this but the main thing was feeding ds (2.7). I was supposed to be having some time off, out with a friend, but that didn't really work out so I was around a lot more than I intended and am stressy about what I saw.

Afaik, today ds got a small bowl of sweet flakes, a few bites he stole from my bread/cheese and then dh's bread/cheese, several biscuits and a bit more cheese, some grapes (that I nagged dh into giving - instant request for more from ds), some of a babychino, several more biscuits and cheese. By biscuit I mean home-made gingerbread.

Finally at the evening meal he got spag bol with extra veg, which he scoffed, then 2nds and 3rds. Then dessert which he insisted include fruit, yoghurt and another biscuit.

Ds is an awesome eater and normally with me he'd have had lots more food, including fruit and veg and other forms of protein (meat, peanut butter) throughout the day. Afa dh is concerned, ds ate a large evening meal and that's terrific, IABU. I think it's shitty to keep a little one that hungry, and poorly nourished, even if ds was having too much fun to complain for most of the day.

I know I can be a bit weirdy about food as I tend to hypoglycemia and it makes me so insane I can't bear anyone else to be hungry, but am I really being that unreasonable?

OP posts:
abbierhodes · 14/11/2009 11:33

I don't get it. You were there, and you allowed your DS to eat what you consider to be insufficient food?

Arwenwasrobbed · 14/11/2009 11:34

Did / Can he say he was hungry? Mine at 2.7 were more than happy to make their nutrional needs know lol - And after BLW I'm happy to do hunger led eating with the priviso that they can eat anything they like between meals as long as its fruit

PrincessToadstool · 14/11/2009 11:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

alwayslookingforanswers · 14/11/2009 11:37

He he cry because he was hungry if he didn't I'm not sure what the problem is.

violethill · 14/11/2009 11:38

Sounds like your DH and DS had a fun, happy day, during which they both ate cheese, bread, fruit, spag bol and yoghurt.

You sound like a control freak.

And I agree with the poster who asked why, if you are so neurotic, you stood by and watched your child go hungry.

And why can't a 2 and half year old make his needs known anyway?!

MaMight · 14/11/2009 11:38

Sounds plenty to me.

Was ds whining and hungry? I am guessing not because then surely you would have interviened. And if he wasn't whining and hungry then what's the prob?

TrinityHasAVampireRhino · 14/11/2009 11:38

you were there??

why didn'y you feed him then??

and at 2.7 he can clearly tell you if he is hungry/thirsty/full up or not can't he?
I think I have misunderstood

TheFallenMadonna · 14/11/2009 11:40

Great that your DS was having lots of fun. Does sound like a lot of 'homemade gingerbread', but the fun - that sounds good.

alwayslookingforanswers · 14/11/2009 11:42

presumably it doesn't happen very often that he has a bit a of "shite food" day (although apart from possibly a few too many biscuits) doesn't sound that terrible to me.

LIZS · 14/11/2009 11:52

fruitshoots, crisps and coke ? no ? Sounds ok to me . If you were so concerned you'd have organised it yourself .

alwayslookingforanswers · 14/11/2009 11:54

LIZ - my DS3 (2 1//2) could quite easily have a day with a diet like the OP's ds did, plus the fruit shoot and crisps (draw the line at the coke though )

SoupDragon · 14/11/2009 11:56

Personally, unless you'd be happy with DH criticising how you look after your DS I suggest you keep quiet

It doesn't look bad at all and I assume your DS is capable of saying he is hungry.

PrincessToadstool · 14/11/2009 11:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MrsFlittersnoop · 14/11/2009 12:33

Cereal, bread, cheese, grapes, home-made gingerbread? And a big spag bol with lots of veg, fruit and yoghurt? Sounds fine to me.

Was your DS crying, bad-tempered, floppy or tired during the day? If not, then there is no reason to be concerned about his blood-sugar levels.

It's very easy to project our own issues with food onto our kids. But don't criticise and undermine your DH for doing things differently to you.

MilkNoSugarPlease · 14/11/2009 13:49

He hardly starved him did he! at that age if he was hungry he'd let someone know!

I would say that if it concerned you that much then you should have stepped in but quite frankly it looks like your DH did a stand up job of looking after DS..

If you have issues with food then thats your issue, dont make it your DS's or cristsize your DH because it wasnt done in "your" way

MilkNoSugarPlease · 14/11/2009 13:50

Oop last sentance same as flittersnoop! woops

MilkNoSugarPlease · 14/11/2009 13:52

Oh and saying "looked after" in the air quotes, is frankly quite pissy!

groundhogs · 14/11/2009 13:55

Oh one day won't kill him... I know what you mean, but you are being a little precious about it.

If you really are bothered by it all, perhaps next time deforst a little something you've made on another occasion for DH to whack in the oven.

then your conscience will be clear, and DH will have little excuse... but let them have a bit of junk once in a blue moon, it's not the end of the world, and it wasn't turkey twizzlers or whatever..

alwayslookingforanswers · 14/11/2009 13:56

"and it wasn't turkey twizzlers or whatever.."

and so what if it was? Even that's not going to harm them once in a while if they're otherwise eating a healthy balanced diet.

belgo · 14/11/2009 14:01

I'm really confused by the OP, it sounds like he's had loads of food, a good balanced diet. if he didn't complain about being hungry then maybe he wasn't hungry?

bubblagirl · 14/11/2009 14:03

i think sounds fine not the way you woyuld do it but thats the joy of 2 parents 2 styles of parenting my dp doesnt feed ds as i would but his well looked after and not screaming from starvation thats fine for me 2 styles of parenting is good no harm is done in it

i cant see where he was poorly nourished my ds eats small bowl cereal , fruit around 10.30 biscuits,
lunch at lunch time
fruit or crisps 2 ish and huge dinner at tea time his 4 he doesnt have seconds or thirds either

some children will eat whatever is there but sometimes doesnt mean its healthy could be over eating

the food fed by dh sounds very sufficient dont panic a child will not starve in one day and any hungry child will make themselves known try not to be so hung up on food your dh would never allow his own child to starve and he seems more than capable of looking after his own son

nomoralfibre · 14/11/2009 14:09

Sorry- this must make for difficult reading. But I completely agree with the others. It sounds like your son ate pretty well to me but even if he didn't it really won't hurt him once in a while. I'm a big believer in parents butting out if and when the other partner assumes 'sole charge' for a while.

diddl · 14/11/2009 14:13

Oh for goodness sake!!

Have to agree with others.

And what in the name of all that´s holy is a babychino?

bigchris · 14/11/2009 14:14

is it from an american coffee shop?

BelindaCarlisle · 14/11/2009 14:16

he looks pretty chubby so I am sure he is fine

Swipe left for the next trending thread