to be pissy with the way dh "looked after" ds today?

[phdlife]

There's more to it than this but the main thing was feeding ds (2.7). I was supposed to be having some time off, out with a friend, but that didn't really work out so I was around a lot more than I intended and am stressy about what I saw.

Afaik, today ds got a small bowl of sweet flakes, a few bites he stole from my bread/cheese and then dh's bread/cheese, several biscuits and a bit more cheese, some grapes (that I nagged dh into giving - instant request for more from ds), some of a babychino, several more biscuits and cheese. By biscuit I mean home-made gingerbread.

Finally at the evening meal he got spag bol with extra veg, which he scoffed, then 2nds and 3rds. Then dessert which he insisted include fruit, yoghurt and another biscuit.

Ds is an awesome eater and normally with me he'd have had lots more food, including fruit and veg and other forms of protein (meat, peanut butter) throughout the day. Afa dh is concerned, ds ate a large evening meal and that's terrific, IABU. I think it's shitty to keep a little one that hungry, and poorly nourished, even if ds was having too much fun to complain for most of the day.

I know I can be a bit weirdy about food as I tend to hypoglycemia and it makes me so insane I can't bear anyone else to be hungry, but am I really being that unreasonable?

Me too PerfectStorm. hate the idea that she should be grateful for a day off, and let him feed arbitary quantities of gingerbread and cheese to keep the child going..because it maybe be a one off, but only because she's keeping a straighter course the rest of the week/month/year/childhood...

But I only think that because of my own experience. It's lovely that DS has fun every time DH is in charge, but pisses me off that fun is all that happens. No washing, cleaning, "proper" feeding etc etc. Really not a break when you have to always be the conscientious one (apart from I decide to feed him crap of course )

Anyway, I still think there is more to it, and yes, OP should've left them to it, or said "you haven't been home since we started doing X for lunch" or similar. Then she shoudl leave it there. Unless she wants to start a WHOLE childrearing discussion (which maybe they need?).

So, YABU to stand around watching him sin, but YANBU to hope that your child can have sensible food and fun at hte same time (not mutally exclusive).

Ackshley, looking again at the OP I would maybe rephrase - YANBU to expect equal responsibility from DH for child's health, YABU to consider him "hungry and malnourished"!

it was ONE Frigging day.

She assumes her DS was hungry because she would have been, despite the fact she admits that he was happy. Hungry children generally aren't happy.

And I'm glad I'm not that perfect that I never have "shite/snacky" food day(s) with my children.

She states that her DS requested more grapes - that indicates to me that if he were still hungry he could have asked for more.

I'm going to take a wild stab in the dark here and guess that the OP is a SAHM - who gets her fair share of fun and games during the week, and the DH works during the week.

If so - then that's just bloody part of life being a SAHM with a working DH (I've done it for the majority of my years of being a parent) - daddy gets all the fun at the weekend because that's what the kids want.

i think the kid had ample to eat during the day

who doesn't like being fed biscuits all day?

i love it.

"that's just bloody part of life being a SAHM with a working DH"

No. It isn't. My DH is an adult in this household, not an extra child. My sympathies if yours is not.

what?

If I was working all week and only reall home at the weekend my children would want the fun with me.

tbh if I were the OP and she is a SAHM with working DH then I wouldn't give to hoots what my DH got up to with the kids at the weekend when I had a chance to have a break. It's never bothered me that DH got all the fun with them when working full time and I had to spread my fun with them out over the week inbetween other day to day stuff.

It's not DH that made it that way - it was the DS's own doing, they didn't want daddy standing their doing the ironing, or spending hours in the kitchen, or cleaning the house, they wanted to play with him.

and believe me - there's no need to give me any sympathy - I got up at 12.30 this afternoon (I'm don't usually lie-in that long when it's my turn but I didn't sleep much last night so slept to my hearts content this morning

and actually for a while DH did insist on doing housework/cleaning and other "stuff" when he was home at the weekends and it use to drive me bloody mental as the DS's were clammering to spend time with him just having fun.