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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Hubby put my beautiful pushchair in his manky boot when I specifically asked him not to!

111 replies

cancantcan · 27/10/2009 19:59

Bit of background, I'm VERY careful with my pushchairs, and like them to look nice. about 2 months ago, my husband put a pushchair I had sold in the boot of his car (which is filthy as he carries oil etc around in it) without my knowing, and it ended up with a manky stain on it and I ended up scrubbing it clean at work while waiting for the courier. Needless to say I was NOT impressed and forbade him ever to put my pushchairs in his scabby boot ever again.
Fast forward to today. He forgot to pick pushchair up from my mums when he collected DD yesterday, I forgot tonight, I had arranged to get it tomorrow, but then he got time wrong for a meeting at church and thought he would do me a favour and nip up to get it tonight for me, which I greatly appreciate BUT despite me having specifically asked him to put it in the front of the car which I know is clean, he has ignored me and put it in the boot. I have just paid £80 for a new hood and footmuff from poshbugs (he knows this and knows how much it cost me, and that I have saved my own hard earned cash). He cant understand why I am so pissed off that he ignored me.

am I being unreasonable to be angry at him for risking ruining £80 of covers when I specifically asked him to put the pushchair in the front?

OP posts:
StephHaydock · 27/10/2009 20:00

Perspective, please.

duckyfuzz · 27/10/2009 20:02

oh ffs its a pushchair!

hatwoman · 27/10/2009 20:02

did it get a manky stain on it or are you pissed off on principle? if the latter then make your point (once) and then let it go.

halfcut · 27/10/2009 20:02

yabu

bastardingmen · 27/10/2009 20:05

you sound quite quite mad

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 27/10/2009 20:05

Fair enough for the one you were selling, but did he actually get your new stuff dirty today?

And really? £80 on stuff for your pushchair? YABU for caring so much what your pushchair looks like!

cakeywakey · 27/10/2009 20:08

In the grand scheme of things it really doesn't matter. Dirt happens

singalongamumum · 27/10/2009 20:08

I agree with hat woman. Actually, I don't... just make your point once anyway then leave it, whatever the outcome. I can see it's irritating, but it'd be easy to overreact. Is there a reason you are calling them your pushchairs? Do they not belong to both of you/ the family at large?

Original poster
cancantcan · 27/10/2009 20:09

I know its only a pushchair, but I have saved long and hard for the new covers, which he clearly doesnt give a sh*t about. I have brought pushchair in now and it isnt marked thankfully, but if it had been stained, then I would be the one saving up to replace the covers, not him.

OP posts:
hatwoman · 27/10/2009 20:09

yes singalong - I think you;re right actually.

StephHaydock · 27/10/2009 20:10

mad as a fish

AitchTwoToTangOh · 27/10/2009 20:11

okay, so it isn't marked. can you put it behind you? it IS annoying when your dh repeats the same mistake when it caused you hassle the last time, it doesn't really matter that it's a buggy. but there's bugger all you can do about it, some people are just like that.

hf128219 · 27/10/2009 20:13

Oh god I completely understand - I would be gutted.

Have you tried 'WhooshUrPushchair non-toxic cleaner'?

You can get it in Robert Dyas - you spray it on, leave it for 30 minutes and the cloth/metal comes up brand new.

boyraiser · 27/10/2009 20:14

You're bonkers. It's a PUSHCHAIR! You're supposed to wheel kids round in them - through puddles, doggy-doo, and mud. Then your kids spill stuff on them or wee/dribble/sneeze on them.

YABU

Original poster
cancantcan · 27/10/2009 20:16

If it was just dirt I wouldnt mind , its the oil stains which ruin things.
Would you all not be pissed off if for example you asked your hubby to put engine oil in the boot of your car and he deliberately ignored you and got it all over the car seat where you had to sit?
Or if your other half decided to do some laundry and put your cashmere sweater in the tumble drier after you specifically asked him not to?
Sorry to get on the defensive, but I now feel like its somehow a crime to want have a nice puschair - I appreciate its not important in the scheme of things, but it does matter to me

OP posts:
Naetha · 27/10/2009 20:29

lol - get over yourself.

heavealot · 27/10/2009 20:36

Just how many pushchairs do you have?

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 27/10/2009 20:38

My DH wouldn't care about having clean pushchair covers. Ever. Nothing I could say would make him care.

AnyGhoulKno · 27/10/2009 20:40

YANBU

nightmareteamgirl · 27/10/2009 20:43

If it was laundry/ clothes/ dry cleaning/ duvets etc, then yes I would be peevced, but honestly a pushchair? No i dont think so. Push chairs should go in boots, the wheels could have dog poo on, or be muddy or anything. I wouldnt want that on the seat's of my car

edam · 27/10/2009 20:44

Half of me is siding with everyone who says it's a pushchair for heaven's sake, dirt/vomit/mud/snot/assorted stains are inevitable. (But not oil - the others are generally removable, oil's a real pig.)

But part of me is right with you. You saved up your hard-earned cash for something that mattered to you - he knew it mattered to you, he knew you didn't want him to put your precious stuff in the oily boot of his car, yet he went and did it anyway. That's a real lack of respect for your wishes, for your efforts in saving that money, for your possessions and for what matters to you. (Can you tell I've had vaguely similar issues with my dh..?).

Suggest you stage a 'confession' that you've damaged something that really matters to him and see how he feels about it.

theyoungvisiter · 27/10/2009 20:47

Sorry I had to laugh at this. It's a pushchair!

Why do you care so much? Is it because you are worried what other people think, or because you want to sell it on later?

FWIW I'm SURE no-one else is looking at your pushchair with disapprobation. In fact I regard people with pristine pushchairs a bit suspiciously - it's like people with overly neat children. Not natural in my mind, I always suspect they must keep them shrink-wrapped and in suspended animation at home and only let them out for walkies.

MORgueOSKY · 27/10/2009 20:47

If my dp ever took it upon himself to forbid me from doing anything I would be fuming.

It is just a pram, I don't get pram obsessions.

theyoungvisiter · 27/10/2009 20:49

but it was mean of your DH not to respect your property if he knew it was important to you - I just don't understand why you'd stress over something that's SO hard to keep pristine, by it's very nature.

Why don't you spend the next £80 on a fabulous handbag to make yourself feel better, and stuff the pushchair

wannaBe · 27/10/2009 20:50

but £80 for a cover for a pushchair? £80? more money than sense.