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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

naked toddlers showering at the public swimming pool

214 replies

Danthe4th · 19/10/2009 21:25

At our local swimming pool it is glass sided and the showers are in full few of the veiwing area, and the car park at a push.

I take my 4 year old for his swimming lessons on a wednesday morning, they also have the mums and tots class. I sit watching my sons class and the previous class are using the showers.

Why do mums strip their children off so they shower naked. I'm at the point when i'm going to say something, but do I say it to mum or management.Several children do this.

There are often workmen, strangers, dads whoever wondering about. I just don't think its necessary to strip children naked, why can mums not leave their costumes on.

I find myself scanning the area to see if anyone is looking, it just worries me.Am I being unreasonable.

OP posts:
Ivykaty44 · 19/10/2009 21:55

It makes me want to weep in the corner this attitude makes children victims

colditz · 19/10/2009 21:56

YANBU

The peedos might touch them WITH THEIR EYES

spicybingowings · 19/10/2009 21:58

YABU - though I hope our swimming pool never decides to have its showers in full view of the car park...

beaniesinthebucketagain · 19/10/2009 21:58

i cant decided whether to say yabu or yanbu!

I personally would never allow my children to be naked in public, im a worrier but then a week after ds 2.5 ran down the drive to daddy in nothing but a swimnappy (in the summer) the man across the road was arrested and his pc seized, makes you clucky i guess!

however im not keen on the 'workmen' comment dp is a builder and he and several friends are the best dads ive ever met. And whats the chance a workman could have a child inside swimming and glanced to see if they could see them!

charitygirl · 19/10/2009 21:59

Morloth is right - as long as I'm with them, there is no reason why my children should change their behaviour because there might be a lurking perv.

I was a tad precocious as a child in my picking up of news etc, but I still remember wondering whether my dad would abuse me like the stories I'd heard about, and it even used to make me feel uncomfortable in his presence sometimes. And this was nearly 20 years ago - must be even worse for kids now. Everyone one wants to abuse you!

Ivykaty44 · 19/10/2009 21:59

this is how I dont want my dd to be seen - naked in a shower at 5 is fine

BoobBuffet · 19/10/2009 21:59

What exactly is the risk though? That some babies will be seen naked?
YABU, in quite a hysterical Daily Hate kind of way imo

chegirlknowswhereyoulive · 19/10/2009 22:01

But peados are sexually attracted to children with their clothes on too. How would a small bit of lycra protect them?

There may be a perv present and perhaps he/she may get an extra thrill out of seeing that bit more of a child's body but would it really make that much more difference?

If he was going to follow a mother and child home would the sight of the child in the shower really be the trigger?

Since when did the sight of a naked baby become a sexual thing to a normal adult? When I see a baby with no clothes on I think awwwww not pwhoooor.

BoobBuffet · 19/10/2009 22:01

colditz

legspinner · 19/10/2009 22:02

I agree with most posters, it shouldn't matter.

On a related issue, a couple of years back I did get told off for getting my then preschooler DD changed by the poolside (it's faster, there are chairs there, can keep an eye on my other DCs if they are still in the pool etc) instead of in a changing room. I was quite surprised as we had done this before many times and didn't think anything of it, and so had many other parents with preschoolers. He then told me that there had been a problem with people "lurking" to watch the kids and they were now getting parents to change / shower their kids in the changing rooms instead. I was appalled as had never even thought it an issue.

seeker · 19/10/2009 22:04

Bizarre. How exactly are they going to come to any harm?

mylovelymonster · 19/10/2009 22:05

Sorry - the swimming pool showers are open to view? So everyone showering is in view to general public areas? Are you not supposed to use them for a wash then - just a quick rinse in your cozzie? How odd........is this a new phenomenon I've been blissfully unaware of?
Both swimming pools near us have an open shower area in each of the male & female changing areas, but not viewable by pool/viewing areas.

corriefan · 19/10/2009 22:07

YABU I do this, the showers are public but not in view of non-swimmers I don't want my kids to think they need to be ashamed of their bodies.
I was at a park in the summer and they had water stuff out. Ds was fine keeping pants on but my dd (3) wanted to take hers off. I said OK as it was really warm and then one of the people in charge of the equipment told me to put her pants back on.

piscesmoon · 19/10/2009 22:10

I haven't got toddlers any more but I wouldn't care who saw them naked in the showers-I can't see that it matters.

HeSaysSheSays · 19/10/2009 22:10

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

defineme · 19/10/2009 22:11

You know I don't think this is entirely to do with perceived risk of paedophiles.
I think it's also this country in particular's ridiculous attitude to nakedness. In other countries this is not the case at all. My Czech friend thinks we're all mad -it's all communal mixed sex changing rooms with no cubicles over there. They have no prudishness about nakedness.
We think nudity is naughty and rude - I feel it too-it's the way we've all been brought up and it's silly.
I could not bring myself to enter a communal mixed sex shower in an Austrian hostel - no one else could care less about me and my naked body-it was all my own British uptight problem.
I love ity when my dtwins whip off their suits in the swimming pool showers -it means they have none of my hang ups ...yet.

MillyR · 19/10/2009 22:11

In some countries you have to shower naked in a communal shower or you are not allowed in the pool. They think we are skanky because we wash with swimsuits on.

No doubt they are plagued by swimming pool abuse cases!

TheMysticMasseuse · 19/10/2009 22:12

oh come ON. YABU.

piscesmoon · 19/10/2009 22:16

If you were in Iceland, Danthe, you would have to shower naked ,yourself, in communal showers-if you wanted to swim you would have no choice!

thatsnotmymonster · 19/10/2009 22:16

YABU

I can't stop mine stripping off at the pool showers- they don't see it as normal to shower with 'clothes' on.

I also prefer it if they take their swim stuff off otherwise when you wrap them up in a towel, the towel gets soaked through from their wet swim wear.

HeSaysSheSays · 19/10/2009 22:18

I have just reported my post, sorry Pavlov, my stresses are not you problem and I shouldn't take it out on you. I just found your post patronising to someone who has been through the things I have - which is what I should have said in the first place. Sorry.

Poledra · 19/10/2009 22:19

yy thatsnotmymonster, the soggy towel thing gets me too.

DD1 (5.5) still sometimes strips off in the shower after swimming lesson. However, I have noticed some of the older children sniggering at her so am wondering if I should stop her doing it

LadyOfTheFlowers · 19/10/2009 22:25

Our pool has signs up saying nobody is allowed to take their swimmers off.

crankytwaaaaaahhhhnky · 19/10/2009 22:29

Are you being serious?

I think paedophiles would be able to find a better way of seeing naked children than going to the swimming pool disguised as a workman.

FFS you are sexualising children.

I think you'll find most abusers target their own children or relatives. I don't think a crazed nonce driven wild by lust is going to wrench your child out of your arms in the baby pool.

lisad123wantsherquoteinDM · 19/10/2009 22:35

YABU I shower my girls naked at poolside as the chorline upsets their skin as does the bubbles left in their suits. trust me peado's dont need clothes off to be attracted to a child sad but true. I refuse to hide my girls away in the risk of them running inot a weirdo. You do know over 98% of abuse of children is someone already known to them.