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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to ask friend, who came from abroad to visit new baby & family, to leave?

473 replies

RenderedSpeechless · 07/10/2009 11:48

This is my first AIBU, please be gentle with me. i really am in a dilemma about this and willing to consider all viewpoints. she in in house with me now, so typing fast. apols in advance for typos and poss having to 'reveal by stealth'. tia

friend came last week to visit me, newborn and family. after two days she states that she came on open ticket and had come to 'help'. however, as my cousin is living with and helping me, my friend has decided to get a job until christmas, before flying back home.

so, yesterday, she enquired in the local shopping centre and updated her cv. this has MY address and phone number on. she didnt ask in advance and i was too chicken to say anything at the time. im worried this is the thin end of the wedge and that she will need bank account, NI number etc in my address.

the overall situation is far from ideal. she is sleeping on the settee, has a bag in the hallway and another in my bedroom. there are a total of 7 people now living in my 3 bedroom home. no mention has been made,by me or her, about this arrangement. am usually mindful to use appliances at night, when its cheaper. she puts on heating, washing machine, tumble drier without a second thought and its starting to rile me. she also involves with managing children, to which i have commented, but i dont want her to feel gauche and unwelcome. i feel bad typing this post and maybe shouldnt say anything? i have 3 week old, is it my hormones and aibu?

OP posts:
Heated · 09/10/2009 20:38

This thread has me on tenterhooks too.

Do you think she'll stay or pack up her capers and go?

FABIsInTraining · 09/10/2009 20:38

I just think it is getting late for her to be leaving and settling in somewhere new.

MaLopez · 09/10/2009 20:39

Getting my bean bag, biscuit tin and hipflask. Will settle in the corner till the bitter end

InMyLittleHead · 09/10/2009 20:39

Yes she does go tonight.

Have only just found this thread and am She is a total freeloading nightmare.

Excellent that you have a key to DB's house, don't be afraid to use it. Just take her there and leave her avec key.

Katisha · 09/10/2009 20:40

It's only half past 8.

SmallSCREAMCap · 09/10/2009 20:41

Ah ha, you have a key!

Now I understand your composure.

monkeysavingexpertdotcom · 09/10/2009 20:42

Keep that thought, Rendered! (another lurker here who's been watching this thread in horror).

KEAWYED · 09/10/2009 20:42

Hope she foes in the next 20 minutes.

Benidorm is on at 9 and I don't want to miss but can't drag myself away from the screen.

RenderedSpeechless · 09/10/2009 20:42

Erm, she was up a lot later than this chatting and showing my dp the dvd of her skydiving! She goes tonight! .

OP posts:
Katisha · 09/10/2009 20:43

Didn't we establish earlier that brother is picking her up at 10pm?

Pwsimerimew · 09/10/2009 20:43

I'm sitting comfortably too ........

scrimble · 09/10/2009 20:43

I'm amazed at how thick-skinned she is. Rendered, you have been so lovely about this whole thing.

FABIsInTraining · 09/10/2009 20:44
monkeysavingexpertdotcom · 09/10/2009 20:45

Heated, I've got a little tune in my head and I'm singing your post - "will she stayayay, or pack up her capers and go-oh-oh-oh?"

RenderedSpeechless · 09/10/2009 20:46

exactly katisha; i just read that in midst of minor wobble whether 10pm was just totally impractical.

no, no, she's a big girl. its TONIGHT - unconditionally!

OP posts:
Kayzr · 09/10/2009 20:47

Stick to your guns Rendered!!

justaboutautumn · 09/10/2009 20:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Katisha · 09/10/2009 20:49

There's still an hour and 20 mins - plenty of time to fry up a little something with capers and aubergines?

RenderedSpeechless · 09/10/2009 20:50

well, i may have been lovely about all this YESTERDAY, but today's today and i want her gone, and im not in a being in a lovely about this mood tonight.

(can you tell my temperature is rising?)

OP posts:
RenderedSpeechless · 09/10/2009 20:54

haha! children off to bed and have just said their 'goodbyes'. so, she HAS to go tonight-wouldnt want to confuse the children?

OP posts:
preciouslillywhite · 09/10/2009 20:57

what's happened? has she gone yet?? can anyone give me a brief synopsis so I don't have to read through the 9 pages in the middle?

Imisssleeping · 09/10/2009 20:59

1 hour to go.
Bye Bye Miss Italian Pie

JJ · 09/10/2009 21:00

Please tell me I'm not the only one who can't possibly leave the computer until she goes?

Good luck. I hope she leaves soon. Not sure I can stand the suspense much longer.

MaLopez · 09/10/2009 21:00

She is still here. Not sharing my brandy in the hipflask though.

Katisha · 09/10/2009 21:00

The countdown has begun.
T minus 60.

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