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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be a bit annoyed that my cleaner made herself a cuppa?

544 replies

kwaker5 · 19/08/2009 20:01

Have had a cleaner for about 8 weeks. On first visit I offered her a cuppa as I was having one but she declined and said she always brought her own drinks with her [pointed to cool bag].

I usually let her in and clear off with the DCs while she's there but last week I came back a bit earlier than normal and noticed she'd made herself a brew.

I'm not really pissed off but it's niggling at me. Isn't there and unwritten rule that they shouldn't go in your cupboards/drawers?

OP posts:
KeepPassingTheOpenWindows · 20/08/2009 08:18

At least she isn't helping her self to a large G&T!

woodenchair · 20/08/2009 08:22

She had a teabag, some milk and maybe some sugar, don't be so tight.

Yes she went into your cupboards, but it was to find a teabag, not a rummage through our bedside table, it's totally different.

secretgardin · 20/08/2009 08:26

maybe thats where the op hides her large stash of money... or wacky backie....or both

sybilfaulty · 20/08/2009 08:28

Oh dear. You are not really upset about the teabag, milk and sugar are you? So she opened your cupboards for this - you had offered her a drink and presumably she thought it would be OK. It's tea not absinthe for goodness' sake. I am afraid I think you are being very unreasonable.

skihorse · 20/08/2009 08:32

YABTFU. Get a life.

I am at work today (sorry, it'd be difficult to explain the concept to you) and already I've had 3 drinks. Sacre bleu!

pooexplosions · 20/08/2009 08:33

I think you should call then police and report it as theft. I mean, that tbag probably cost half a penny, and 1p for a splas of milk.....

YAB the most U I'e ever seen on here, and thats some prize.

BouncingTurtle · 20/08/2009 08:36

Farking hell, if I had a cleaner, I'd be telling her to make herself a cuppa and giving her chocolate hobnobs! She'd deserve after cleaning up my pigsty house!

ibangthedrums · 20/08/2009 08:38

Our cleaner does our ironing and then puts it away in our wardrobes - how would you cope with that!!!!????

bubblagirl · 20/08/2009 08:41

personally i encourage anyone in my house to amke a cup of tea especially if someone is working there god i wouldn't dream of them not having a cup of tea after all they would be spending the day cleaning up after you a cup of tea should be a written rule

ive had workmen in and if i need to go out i say 'help yourself to tea and biscuits but if i hadn't and id come back to find they had a drink wouldn't bother me at all

MrsGladpuss · 20/08/2009 08:56

Dial 999. Immediately. Tell them you need to report the Char for theft. Make a list of all the items stolen. ie one tea bag (I do hope it wasn't the Earl Grey!), hot water, 10ml milk, one sugar lump.

Did she also use the best china? If so add in criminal damage. You won't want to use it after the help's mouth has been all over it.

And then write to your MP, petitioning for capital punishment to be brought back in for such crimes as those listed above.

Then I would see if there's a local support group you could join.

MojoLost · 20/08/2009 09:09

Don't know about this one.
My cleaner, comes in, we have a 5 minute chat, starts cleaning straight away, finishes in about 2.5 hours and then leaves, there is no time for cups of tea.

gagamama · 20/08/2009 09:13

Unless you keep your teabags tucked away behind your S&M gear or locked away in a combination safe, YABU! It's hardly rifling through your cupboards, it's not difficult to guess where a mug, tea bags and milk would be kept.

She probably does it every visit but clears up after herself before you get back. Not because she's and theiving, scheming tea-abuser, but because she's a sodding cleaner and that's just how they roll.

Stigaloid · 20/08/2009 09:17

I came home yesterday to discover that the cleaner had decided to try and clean teh carpets with washing up liquid that stained teh carpet and now looks much worse than it did before she started trying. Carpet looks ruined and i am a little . I appreciate she was just trying to keep herself busy and i blame myself because i tidied the kitchen myself the day before so she had less to do in there but i now have what looks like massive tea stains all over our hallway and it looks awful. Gah!

TheBolter · 20/08/2009 09:17

I'd be thrilled if my cleaner made herself a drink. She never accepts my offer of one and sometimes I worry for her, she works so bloody hard. As it is I don't think she charges enough and therefore I give her a 'bonus' most months!

Stigaloid · 20/08/2009 09:18

erm.. the not teh - sorry!

MorningTownRide · 20/08/2009 09:21

Conceivably, she is could be cleaning 5 or more houses a day.

Perhaps she thought "kwaker5 has offered me a cuppa before, she won't mind if I make myself one."

All this "oh they should work and leave" is crap. Cleaning people's houses is tiring and sometimes lonely.

A 'friendly' house that provides an oasis in the day is great.

dilemma456 · 20/08/2009 09:29

Message withdrawn

MiniMarmite · 20/08/2009 09:32

YABVU

I used to leave tea and biscuits out for mine until I realised they never had them.

They know where the things are though and I think I'd be quite pleased if I came home to find they'd had a cuppa. Friendly house as MorningTown says.

Happy cleaner = clean house in my view.

OrmIrian · 20/08/2009 09:42

Gawd! Don't you just hate it when the lower orders get uppity.

gasman · 20/08/2009 09:49

FGS totally unreasonable.

Any tradesman who comes to my house to do a job is welcome to a cup of tea or coffee.

I used to worry about my very hardworking cleaner who never seemed to stop for a break or eat very much.

GetOrfMoiLand · 20/08/2009 09:53

If she is working three hours or so she is entitled to a drink, for heaven's sake. What a mean spirited OP.

Oh. and also OP - god help you if you ever have to encounter a genuine problem in life.

MaybeAfterBreakfast · 20/08/2009 09:54

YABVU

Good cleaners are worth their weight in gold. Well worth treating her nicely if you want to hold on to her.

jumpingbeans · 20/08/2009 09:57

OMG, what is wrong with folk on here today, who the fuck do you think you are,clean your own crap up then see if you don't need a cup of tea.

kittywise · 20/08/2009 10:09

The way alot of the posts are written as if the cleaner is doing you a favour by cleaning up your stuff abd should be rewarded with refreshments!.

She is being paid, it is her job, she is not doing you a favour. If she wants a cup of tea then she should be doing it out of working hours. If you work for 3 hours you do not need a tea break fgs!

gasman · 20/08/2009 10:21

kitty

Have you tried to get and keep a decent cleaner in an area where there are lots of other middle class households who also want one?

Believe me. The cleaner is doing you a favour.

Mine was a complete star and I used to love coming home from work on the days that she came - clean house, clean sheets on beds, washing hung out (used to load machine on timer and she would empty).

She got sick and I've tried several agencies. None of them will even contemplate doing most of the above.