Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not understand why so many poor people...

1000 replies

nybom · 05/08/2009 09:22

...are being called "poor" if they can afford:

  • cigarettes/drugs
  • dogs
  • large amounts of takeaways/ready meals
  • ready cut fruit, brands, air freshners and other superfluous crap, kids drinks/other products specifically tailored to kids
  • to go out drinking
  • FF babies
  • to leave lights on, have electrical appliances on standby, not to use energy light bulbs, to keep the water running, to put on half a load of washing, to leave heating on at night
  • to maintain artificial nails, to have hair extensions
  • buy loads of beauty products
  • to leave their car engine on whilst going shopping/standing in a traffic jam
  • to have themed children's birthday parties with loads of props
  • and most of all: have CREDIT cards so they can overdraw

i'm talking of regular habits not just occasional behaviour...

several of my friends are on benefits, so the observations are firsthand and not just assumptions.

a friend of mine (single mum on benefits) got a party bus for her DSs last birthday party (besides loads of presents), this year he's getting a wii (and loads of other presents). WTF?

why don't these people simply save more?

i on the other hand spend less than 100 pounds on a family of four (whilst buying high quality, fresh, organic products) by buying 50% of my shopping reduced/offers, at local markets and a lot of things (like toiletries) from pound shops or discounters. we buy value toilet paper (amongst other things); and i go to the hairdresser twice a year, and only to the beautycian for special occasions such as weddings. the children don't get any toys or clothes from us, as there are enough family and friends who don't know what to buy for christmas/birthday parties. so the kids basically don't cost us anything. we have one credit card and we make sure NEVER to overdraw because of the high interest rates.

i simply don't get it...

OP posts:
FAQtothefuture · 05/08/2009 14:15

and you are still saying that's it's ok for the working rich to be irresponsible and crap at budgeting - but it's not ok for the poor to be crap at budgeting

StinkyFart · 05/08/2009 14:15

compulsory

Original poster
nybom · 05/08/2009 14:16

"She brought in things like FF vs BF which is a topic that brings out a very emotive response and then weakened her "argument" with ridiculous notions such as the precut apples."

i only mentioned precut fruit in the original post. someone else mentioned the precut apple after the BF/FF discussion later on, it wasn't me, look it up if you don't believe me.

VinegarTits
i have repeatedly rephrased my "point", i don't want to answer another time if noone cares to read it and prefers to carry on with the bantering...

OP posts:
VinegarTits · 05/08/2009 14:16

Skyblu you are talking about those only claiming benefits then? the op is about how poor people frittering away their money on pre cut fruit and air fresheners, if you want a debate about how people on benefits spend their money maybe you should start another thread

makedoandmend · 05/08/2009 14:16

Just to check FlighHattendant - did you mean to say you gave your kids WKD watered down or were you joking? (or is there a non alcoholic version of it?)

Sorry - will go back to lurking with look of on my face at OP

FAQtothefuture · 05/08/2009 14:17

and of course lets not forget that if you suddenly find yourself poor and on benefits ou then have to get rid of any gadgets and "luxuries" that you owned while money was ok.

And you're not allowed to budget furiously and save up over a long period of time for gadgets for your kids, any money they get for their birthdays must be put back into the family finance pot and they'r enot allowed to accept gifts of those things either...........

daftpunk · 05/08/2009 14:18

nybom...i think some people have a "oh fuck it" attitude...you know what i mean?...they haven't got much money so they spend what they have got on having a good time (drink/drugs/whatever)....people with "money" are careful in certain areas, but will think nothing of spending £60 an hour on horse riding lessons for dc....

notsoteenagemum · 05/08/2009 14:19

nybom is your revised post still based on first hand observations of friends or do you now admit you were generalising?

If you meant what theladyofthebathtub said why not say so sooner? rather than lurk waiting for someone to back you up.

expatinscotland · 05/08/2009 14:19

'and still be in the same situation when they finally retire.'

retire? i think most people other than the wealthy had better get rid of the notion that they'll be able to kick back without working for the last 30 years of their lives. because it ain't gonna happen.

at least working poor like us are under no delusions.

i sing first fri. of every month in a small pub, and i like the folk song i've learned for this month. particularly the line, 'forwards we rumble, that river and I/ all along your green valleys/I work till I die./travel this road until death sets me free . . . '

MmeLindt · 05/08/2009 14:19

fruit or apples. What is the difference? Precut apples are ok, but other fruit not?

And why bring FF vs BF into it? I have never met someone whose decision to on how to feed her baby was dictated by financial aspects.

FAQtothefuture · 05/08/2009 14:20

well that's a frigging daft way to spend money £60 on an hours riding lesson......I do my weekly shop for that amount .

irresponsible feckers

Mybox · 05/08/2009 14:20

Nybom - doesn't need to back up her post - people can just check out the local social housing areas.

expatinscotland · 05/08/2009 14:20

i see they've not got rid of 'CherylCole' and all her personas.

FAQtothefuture · 05/08/2009 14:22

well I know expat - but some are forced into early retirement because of ill health.......because of their low incomes throughout their life. That's if they make it to retirement age - in many areas of the UK you'll stastically lucky to make it to 60 let alone retirement age.

VinegarTits · 05/08/2009 14:22

Nybom stop namechanging to back yourself up

StinkyFart · 05/08/2009 14:22

what do you mean Mybox?

'people can just check out the local social housing areas.'

I don't understand

FAQtothefuture · 05/08/2009 14:23

so mybox - are the unfortunate sods losing their jobs at the moment supposed to get rid of all the things they've worked hard for before taking up their social housing after losing their homes because of their drop in income??

VinegarTits · 05/08/2009 14:23

Didnt you know they do guided tours of the local socialing housing networks? so the rich can check up on their spending

FAQtothefuture · 05/08/2009 14:24

VT - oh well at least we'll be ok then - as we don't live on an estate, or in social housing

pagwatch · 05/08/2009 14:25

FAQ

nybom won't answer that point - about financial irresponsibility in other 'classes'.
She won't respond to my post from the very first page

here ...

I think it is incredibly daft to assume stereotypical things about any group of people.
I suspect some people are poor because of very poor choices. But I suspect that many people have little experience of financial planning, have little ability to exert themselevs in terms of cooking and saving because they have neither the life experience nor the education to manage these things.

It would be like saying - why did so many comfortably paid people manage to accrue ridiculous and crippling levels of debt just because there was an economic boom? Why do so many people on higher than average wage make no pension provision? Why do people use credit cards at all?
The poor are notthe only socio-economic group to have exhibited finacial fuck wittery in recent years. We all are capeable because we are a) human and b) trying to have a normal life for our children

People do what they know and seek pleasure in the moment. And if you see no financial boom in the future the temptation to give your children the best you can must be over whelming.

It would be more becoming to be grateful that you have the education, ability and determination to manage your finances tbh

I have never cut and pasted my own comment before but I think it is pertinent but she won't respond. She is concentrating on arguingthat apples are not a fruit

Original poster
nybom · 05/08/2009 14:25

Mme Lindt

BF/FF - if you don't have enough money to buy food for the already exsisting family members, why CHOSE to FF? fair enough if you have enough money for the bare essentials of life (food, shelter, clothes), but WHY spend the money on FF if it could be spent in much better ways?

OP posts:
Mybox · 05/08/2009 14:25

Well I can't understand how people on benefits can give their kids all the expensive gadgets plus new clothes etc. How do they do it?

FAQtothefuture · 05/08/2009 14:26

god you've missed my point entirely - are you really that thick???

flatcapandpearls · 05/08/2009 14:26

Catalogues mybox.

VinegarTits · 05/08/2009 14:27

Yes you'll be ok FAQ, but how am i going to hide my damn 50 in flat screen tv? oh shit and theres the sky dish, maybe i could claim that Aliens have landed on my roof

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In
This thread is not accepting new messages.