Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Children gone on Hols with ex and he wont answer the phone or let me speak to them!!! What can i do???

427 replies

Babywhiting · 23/07/2009 10:38

my 2 children have gone on their hols with my ex we have been seperated for 5 years and he asked if they could go with him he has only ever had them stay 2 nights with him in a row! had the odd night once or twice!

they went friday its now thursday and i have not been able to contact them! my dd has a mobile which i ring and it keeps ringing and the ex just cuts his phone off when i ring, ive sent messages saying id like to talk to the kids which he ignored till yesterday when he sent a message saying
"not got good signal will see if they want to talk to you later"

not a word back no call nothing!

i miss my kids and wish they had never gone! what do i do??

OP posts:
pleasechange · 23/07/2009 21:07

"yes she does" - you really think that a parent should have all the rights

but she used the court order as the reason she wouldn't accept any more calls than 2 per week! Does she think the judge has her phone tapped and that she'll be hauled up in court for allowing her children to talk to her father as often as they want ? No, don't think so. Convenient excuse I'd say

thesouthsbelle · 23/07/2009 21:09

then we will agree to disagree about this situation I think.

main thing is kids are OK.

Original poster
Babywhiting · 23/07/2009 21:09

omg allnew get a grip.. you must have a boring life to slate me this much!!!!

OP posts:
pleasechange · 23/07/2009 21:10

well you were happy to let you ex be slated and called a child abuser

thesouthsbelle · 23/07/2009 21:11

(and I don't think I said a parent should have all the rights, I said yes she does as in yes she does say that.) parenting unless in v v extream circs should be equal - however I do realise this is an ideal situation.

thesouthsbelle · 23/07/2009 21:13

you/we do not know the circs in which the OP seperated from her XH, and we shouldn't speculate about it all.

I will openly admit my EX was abusive to me, but he has never been to DS, however the minute he was I would say he was abusing my son, at that point our dynamics would change. as i'm sure it would for pretty much all parents.

skidoodle · 23/07/2009 21:18

allnew you don't know what the court order said or what kinds of arrangements are appropriate in this situation.

Your forensic examination of the op's utterances past and present in order to make some kind of case against her is starting to look a little unhinged.

OP - I'm so glad you got to talk to your children. That should set your mind at ease for a while.

pleasechange · 23/07/2009 21:26

skidoodle - I hardly think you can offer any insight when you yourself say that "I have never, ever heard of any responsible adult denying a parent contact with their children in this way"

pleasechange · 23/07/2009 21:28

skidoodle - I don't recall you saying dittany's calling the ex a child abuser was unhinged

Original poster
Babywhiting · 23/07/2009 21:32

allnew get a life love !!!!

OP posts:
pleasechange · 23/07/2009 21:35

thanks baby - hope you never get a DIL with the same views on parents' rights as you do

ilovemydogandmrobama · 23/07/2009 21:37

Baby -- what a relief for you! Haven't read all the thread, but maybe next time they go away with their dad, you could get them a pay as you go mobile to call you? Of course tell your ex, but he would be mad to object.

Haribosmummy · 23/07/2009 21:44

I'm going to post on the OP only.

As a a NCP (DH) and SM (me), we often take my DSDs away and have done so since they were 3 and 1.

We made sure they called their mum every day when they were as old as the OP's children.

I don't care what the legalities of it are, it's the common decent thing to do.

My DSDs are 14 and 11, they both have mobiles so we generally don't get involved in phone calls anymore, but will always provide a land line or information on flights / resorts we are taking.

It's just good parenting IMHO and I don't think the OP is being unreasonable at all.

wannaBe · 23/07/2009 21:47

so, during the course of this thread, the name and telephone number of the camp sight where the op's children are staying has been written, along with the name of the woman working at the campsight. All on a public website where anyone could find the information and call and speak to 'audrey' (who doesn't appear to be very discrete) and potentially gain access to the op's children.

way to go.

pleasechange · 23/07/2009 21:50

yes wannabe, and alongside that, allegations that the father is a child abuser. Great

Haribosmummy · 23/07/2009 21:51

Oohhh... I think I'll leave this thread now...

wannaBe · 23/07/2009 21:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

prettyfly1 · 23/07/2009 21:58

I am afraid that regardless of whom was right and wrong in this instance MN towers should remove this thread for breach of rl privacy - op you shouldnt have allowed that to happen - EXTREMELY unfair. I shall keep my opinions on the whole situation private as I think enough has been said on both sides but I think you need to take steps to have this thread removed for the privacy and well being of your children. It isnt acceptable to allow that to happen and certainly not the point of mumsnet.

ilovemydogandmrobama · 23/07/2009 22:04

If you think children could be identified, then report it.

wannaBe · 23/07/2009 22:13

I have reported it.

I think it's all to easy to forget that the internet isn't anonomous. And all too easy to write something that could identify someone without thinking about who could read it.

ilovemydogandmrobama · 23/07/2009 22:21

What voice are you using now WannaBe? Was going through my Mac voices and thought of you....

AnyFucker · 23/07/2009 22:23

have reported too

prettyfly1 · 23/07/2009 22:26

me too - before reading that others had.

hester · 23/07/2009 22:52

This thread is quite boggling.

Babywhiting, I'm really glad you've made contact with the children. Hope the holiday passes without further anxiety.

hellymelly · 23/07/2009 23:13

Babywhiting-can't believe the flack you've had here for simply wanting to connect with your very young children. anyway I am glad that things seem to be a bit better . All the very negative posters seem to be step parents,who seemingly couldn't be bothered to properly read your postings but just wanted to vent spleen at their partners' ex wives..